Kw-logo-smaller

Dear Dish-It: My Girlfriend Puts Herself Down

Jan 16, 2012

 

Dear Dish-It,

My girlfriend is the most amazing ever: she’s smart, funny and treats people really well. But she always puts herself down. If she gets a question wrong in math that only the class nerd got right, she’ll say, “Oh, I’m so thick!” In art if something is out of proportion she’ll think she’s rubbish. I think it’s driving us apart; what can I do?

TheBoyfriend

Dear TB,

Sounds like your girlfriend really IS down on herself – but she’s not al;one. Lots of people (and, for some weird reason), many girls suffer from something called low self-esteem, where no matter how amazing they are, they always think that they could be better. Either that, or your girl is a perfectionist – she feels that she always has to get everything 100% right and, if she doesn’t, she beats herself up for it and doesn’t give herself any credit for doing a great job.

Stronger Self-Esteem

You sounds like a really caring boyfriend but, apart from reassuring your girlfriend that she’s great and that you like her exactly the way she is, I’m afraid that this self-esteem issue is one that only she can improve – and only if she wants to. If you talk to her about how her negativity about herself is affecting your relationship, she may be motivated to make a change. If so, there are things she can do to build her self-esteem up, including being kinder to herself and giving herself credit for doing her best.

Have Your Say

Has this ever happened to you? Got any good advice for TheBoyfriend? Leave your comment below!

Related Stories
166 Comments

latest videos

F1029189582234

Do You Think You're Hot or Not?

  • I'm good-looking... enough.
  • I'm pretty cute, if I do say so myself.
  • I am one hot, sexy, babe-alicious catch!
  • I'm not very attractive at all.

related stories

Micro_kiera_micro
flat chest asks: "I’m gonna be a freshman in high school next year and I have way smaller boobs t...
heartbroken asks: "I had this crush and soon the popular girls found out. Then one of them told h...
I have low self-esteem and my classmates’ teasing doesn’t help. I know I'm not ugly, but no one e...

Dear Dish-It in the forums

CloudNineGirl
CloudNineGirl posted in Friends:
Aw, so cute! :)
reply about 4 hours
usagimodoki
usagimodoki posted in Friends:
Forever alone ;_;*Sneef Sneef*
reply about 11 hours
Fox7Fabsome
Fox7Fabsome posted in Friends:
"Tldc_Julisha" wrote:I just don't think I should be alive anymore and people bully me and cyber bully me for so long that I think its time to give up is what my friend texted me No you have so much to live for. I never meet you but still
reply 1 day
Kirsteeeeen
Kirsteeeeen posted in Style:
Go with whatever you feel most comfortable with, and is best suited for the event. 
reply 1 day
Kirsteeeeen
Kirsteeeeen posted in Friends:
If you're having issues on KW then you can always report, ignore/delete, and block the person! Also let the moderators/admin know you're having issues! Same goes with most other places online.  It's also a good idea to tell an adult; you don't deserve to go through this! Whether it be a parent, a friends parent, teacher, principal, counsellor, family member, police officer, any trusted adult!  Unfortunately we here cannot stop what is going on for you, but we can remind you that you can get through this and things will get better. Keep your head up, and stand up for yourself. Take care. :)
reply 1 day

play online games