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Dear Dish-It: My Girlfriend Puts Herself Down

Jan 16, 2012

 

Dear Dish-It,

My girlfriend is the most amazing ever: she’s smart, funny and treats people really well. But she always puts herself down. If she gets a question wrong in math that only the class nerd got right, she’ll say, “Oh, I’m so thick!” In art if something is out of proportion she’ll think she’s rubbish. I think it’s driving us apart; what can I do?

TheBoyfriend

Dear TB,

Sounds like your girlfriend really IS down on herself – but she’s not al;one. Lots of people (and, for some weird reason), many girls suffer from something called low self-esteem, where no matter how amazing they are, they always think that they could be better. Either that, or your girl is a perfectionist – she feels that she always has to get everything 100% right and, if she doesn’t, she beats herself up for it and doesn’t give herself any credit for doing a great job.

Stronger Self-Esteem

You sounds like a really caring boyfriend but, apart from reassuring your girlfriend that she’s great and that you like her exactly the way she is, I’m afraid that this self-esteem issue is one that only she can improve – and only if she wants to. If you talk to her about how her negativity about herself is affecting your relationship, she may be motivated to make a change. If so, there are things she can do to build her self-esteem up, including being kinder to herself and giving herself credit for doing her best.

Have Your Say

Has this ever happened to you? Got any good advice for TheBoyfriend? Leave your comment below!

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Comments

skatebourder45
im just like the girl and that pic is how i feel about me
commented: Sun Oct 13, 2013

JennyD

JennyD wrote:

That's your problem not mine
commented: Mon Aug 05, 2013

EddyJ

EddyJ wrote:

wow that guy is amazing
commented: Sun Jul 21, 2013

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Dear Dish-It in the forums

jakiah582
jakiah582 posted in Friends:
Thank you for your advice you really helped.  :)
reply about 4 hours
PInkpink_
PInkpink_ posted in Friends:
:O quite complicated  
reply about 6 hours
DJwwjd
DJwwjd posted in Family Issues:
try talking to you closest family about it...
reply about 6 hours
rainbowpoptart
rainbowpoptart posted in Style:
"Jelly3" wrote:Neither, I don't wear makeup. 
reply about 7 hours
selenagomez6123
selenagomez6123 posted in Style:
Lipstick :p 
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