Kw-logo-smaller

Dear Dish-It: My Girlfriend Puts Herself Down

Jan 16, 2012

 

Dear Dish-It,

My girlfriend is the most amazing ever: she’s smart, funny and treats people really well. But she always puts herself down. If she gets a question wrong in math that only the class nerd got right, she’ll say, “Oh, I’m so thick!” In art if something is out of proportion she’ll think she’s rubbish. I think it’s driving us apart; what can I do?

TheBoyfriend

Dear TB,

Sounds like your girlfriend really IS down on herself – but she’s not al;one. Lots of people (and, for some weird reason), many girls suffer from something called low self-esteem, where no matter how amazing they are, they always think that they could be better. Either that, or your girl is a perfectionist – she feels that she always has to get everything 100% right and, if she doesn’t, she beats herself up for it and doesn’t give herself any credit for doing a great job.

Stronger Self-Esteem

You sounds like a really caring boyfriend but, apart from reassuring your girlfriend that she’s great and that you like her exactly the way she is, I’m afraid that this self-esteem issue is one that only she can improve – and only if she wants to. If you talk to her about how her negativity about herself is affecting your relationship, she may be motivated to make a change. If so, there are things she can do to build her self-esteem up, including being kinder to herself and giving herself credit for doing her best.

Have Your Say

Has this ever happened to you? Got any good advice for TheBoyfriend? Leave your comment below!

Related Stories
166 Comments

latest videos

F1029189582234

Do You Think You're Hot or Not?

  • I'm good-looking... enough.
  • I'm pretty cute, if I do say so myself.
  • I am one hot, sexy, babe-alicious catch!
  • I'm not very attractive at all.

related stories

Micro_kiera_micro
flat chest asks: "I’m gonna be a freshman in high school next year and I have way smaller boobs t...
heartbroken asks: "I had this crush and soon the popular girls found out. Then one of them told h...
I have low self-esteem and my classmates’ teasing doesn’t help. I know I'm not ugly, but no one e...

Dear Dish-It in the forums

AlphaNino
AlphaNino posted in Friends:
Dear Dish-It Theres a girl in my class that always gives me hugs, When we play a game in class she always comes to sit next to me. Does She Like Me or is it just she's a really good friend? Please Help me .
reply about 5 hours
Valoniak34
this   ###.####################.###  has like sum good stories to,i read ur post here and im happy that ur not hushed about the subjet like sooo many 
reply about 8 hours
electricatheist
If you're willing to face the consequences, then yes. I know a lot of people say violence is never the answer, but in truth it sometimes is. If you really want somebody to leave you alone, then fight. If you win, it shows that you're dominant over that person and hopefully he/she will leave you alone.
reply about 13 hours
DisneyanimeLover
Lovely advice. Than you. I found this quite helpful.
reply about 14 hours
donteatcarrots
donteatcarrots posted in Friends:
Honestly, I think it's better to get your feelings out sooner rather than later- maybe ask him why he's being mean to you... Though, don't say it in such a way that annoys boys... If you know what I mean.
reply about 14 hours

play online games