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Top 5 Confidence Boosters

Having confidence is the difference between feeling unstoppable and wishing no one will notice you. If you're tired of the latter and hoping to feel empowered and unstoppable at least some of the time, check out our top 5 confidence boosters that will instantly help you feel better about being in the spotlight (and may even encourage you to seek it out!)

#5 Find a role model

We are talking about a real person in your life -- not a supermodel, celebrity or pop star, but someone you know and admire. Someone who walks and talks with confidence, and whom you’re also comfortable with. It could be a friend, teacher, sibling, babysitter, aunt… as long as it’s someone you admire, respect, trust and already have a relationship with. You don’t have to recruit her to be your mentor or therapist. Simply ask her to keep you company shopping for back-to-school clothes, listen to you practice your debate speech, give you makeup advice or help you pick out some outfits from your closet.

#4 Find your Style

Steer clear of following any trend blindly and instead give any styles your own personal twist. Conforming and fitting in will just make you feel like everyone else. Fitting in but also having something that makes you unique will make you feel special. The best way we know how to do this is with a little makeover! Grab your BFF, older sibling, mom, or other confidence role model and schedule a head-to-toe image consulting. See what works about your look and what can use some updating, go through magazines or catalogs to see what styles catch your eye, and talk about what you love about yourself and what you'd like to change.

#3 Follow your Dreams

If you have a passion, an interest, a talent, or something that makes you tick, hold on tightly to it. Don’t give up because others say it’s unreasonable, unreachable or impractical. If you have a dream, find a way to nurture even a small part of it and make it a reality. Chip at it little by little each day, one brick at a time. Think it’s impossible? Well, as the White Queen in Alice in Wonderland said: “sometimes, I've believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast."

#2 Take Pride in your Looks

First off, practice good posture. Back straight, shoulders back, chin up and face the world head-on. Walking tall and straight makes you look – and feel – more confident. Having trouble remembering to stand straight? Try this: Every time you walk through a doorway, pull your shoulders back and look straight ahead. Make it a habit by practicing this a few times and you’ll have great posture within the week! Bonus points if you practice looking people in the eye when you speak -- not in a creepy, non-blinking, staring kind of way -- but in an "I am listening and I hear you" kind of way.

Next, clean up your act! Wash your hair as often as necessary for your hair type. There is no excuse for going to school (or anywhere) with greasy hair! Got frizzies? Tame your hair with leave-in conditioner, get the split ends of your hair trimmed often, even if you’re growing out your hair, and keep your hair (and fingernails, since we’re on the subject…) out of your mouth. Wear deodorant every day. Shower at least every other day. Wash your face morning and night and never skip brushing your teeth. Feeling good about how you look on the outside will make you more confident on the inside.

While you’re at it, take pride in your belongings and your surroundings, too. On your way out of your bedroom every morning, pull up the covers, straighten your bed, and always put your clothes away as you take them off. Ditch the habit of shoving papers into your backpack and throwing wrappers into your purse and take an extra few seconds to put things away properly. Taking care of yourself and your things shows you respect yourself, and when you look in the mirror, you’ll see and feel the difference!

#1 Love Yourself

“Focus on things you like about yourself,” suggests Glenn Wolff, a Social Worker and Family Therapist in Stamford, Connecticut. “Focus on your strengths and what you do well: a good violin player, lacrosse player, writing poetry…” whatever makes you unique, different or out of the ordinary makes you special. To remind you of that special quality you are proud of, find or create a symbol for it. It could be keeping a photo of someone who inspires you, a memento from a day that you were really proud of yourself, or a souvenir from a time you were at your happiest and most confident on hand to look at when you need it. Or it could be a secret symbol you draw or create with your hands when you need to find your inner power, self-love and confidence. One girl we spoke with secretly touches her thumbs and pointer fingers  together in the shape of a heart when something negative happens at school. “It reminds me that I love myself no matter what anyone else says or does, and that always keeps me going.”

Have your Say

What do you do to boost your confidence? Share your tips and tricks below!

 

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Dear Dish-It in the forums

astucieuse331
astucieuse331 posted in Friends:
I feel like that too! I know where you're coming from, but believe me, I've moved on. Those people? Bleh. Not worth my time, and certainly don't deserve me.  You described me exactly: good with people and friends, but don't have a best friend at all, and others really don't care whether I'm lonely or sad. Well, it might sound crazy, but guess what? I've found a friend in me instead of others. I've learned to accept that you can't please everyone, and that some of the fish in the sea aren't worth wasting your time on. So I've become independent, to learn to depend on myself more than to rely on others. Trust me, it works, and I think it'll work for you. But if you really need a friend, me and @alienincognito are here to talk to you if you need us! @alienincognito: LOL! DUDE! That's HOW I THINK! Whenever one of my friends talks behind my back or backstabs me, I'm like, "Ah, whatever, 'screw em, I'll let Karma take over! I ain't letting those negative peeps ruin my day." Maybe you, me, and hasti10 could start a group where we can talk to each other!  :) :D 8)
reply about 2 hours
astucieuse331
astucieuse331 posted in Friends:
I've always felt the same way. My one best friend gossiped behind my back, used me, all that girl stuff. She took me for advantage and we had a bunch of fights because of her finding a new friend and completely acting as if I didn't exist, and I told her to give me at least some attention every once in a while if she can't even continue to talk to me daily. And.. I lost her. Well, she lost me. We both lost each other. But then I realized.. it's the people that you least expect to be nice to you you'll find kindness in. Why? Based on personal experience, and I'll tell you the story: For my gym class, me and my peers were supposed to make a group for a dance. This was when my best friend had found a new friend already, and the time at which we had a few fights because of that. Of course, I relied on my best friend to count me in her dance group. At lunchtime, I sat together with my best friend, and we ate our lunches in silence. All of a sudden, I brought up the dance groups and asked her straightforwardly: "Can I join your group?" No reply. "Kelly, can I join your group?" No reply. "I mean, since our class is uneven, I found it fair that there'd be a group of five, you know?" None at all. Kelly ignored me straight off the bat, leaving me speechless. My mind raced with thoughts, and I thought, maybe it's not worth having Kelly as a friend. A few days later, we were playing Dodgeball for gym. I was on Kelly's team, and overheard her talking with her new friends about who to pick for the dance group. One of her friends mentioned me, and Kelly said: "Oh no, we shouldn't pick her because _____ (I don't know what she said then)." I was shocked, but was anticipating it, so when the time came to choose groups, I saw my friend, Luke, ask two girls, Cher and Bridgette, to join their group. Surprisingly, Cher and Bridgette actually accepted him, and so I thought, "Wow, if they accepted Luke, they might accept me aswell!" and so built up the courage to ask them if I could join. Even though Cher and Bridgette were mean to me sometimes, I knew that I had to risk it and see what'd happen. Afterall, rejection is just another opportunity to find a better group. Little did I know, it'd be the best choice of my life. They were so happy, and even thanked me for joining them! I was speechless once more; I never knew that the peers that I thought I would never be friends with would actually be my friends!  So yeah, that's what I learnt, and I never regretted learning that fact. Ever since then, though, I've learnt not to trust people as much as I used to anymore. I learnt that independency is what works for me, what I was meant for in terms of socializing or working. But, other things may work for you. If you still want a friend, you can be independent and wait for the right person. However, if you still want a real friend, you can wait, but still mingle (hang out) with other people! I I'm not going to make fun of you because I know how you've felt, just as I stated in my past problem before. But you can move on from those friends, they're not worth your time and certainly don't deserve you as a friend. Trust me, if it's meant to be, you'll definitely find a true friend. But if it's not, you may become like me, finding happiness in my own way. I want to remind you though-- you don't need someone to stay happy, or keep you company. This may sound silly, but you can even have your own invisible friends! I've had one, but that's very rarely for me. It's not silly though if you see the general idea; usually these friends are made from different dimensions of your personality or just because of will. There's a lot more fish in the sea, though, so I'm sure you'll find a true friend that's meant for you  :) Take care, and I hope you'll find a true friend soon!
reply 1 day
ts01
ts01 posted in Friends:
im so sorry you girls feel that way.true friends are there, its just easier to find users because they are more plentiful. dont give up, you will find real friends eventually
reply 1 day
lolflowergirl
lolflowergirl posted in Friends:
i feel alone too
reply 1 day
kayme123
kayme123 posted in Friends:
i know the feeling. but i got taken off a website instead of my friends. i can assure you they probably feel the same and are missing you, BUT its not worth dwelling over it. friends come and go without any choice in life and trust me, i lost the love of my life and my two of the best friends in the world. The thing is, you have to move on, because they wouldent want you feeling sad over them right? they'd want you to be the happy person you were when you were with them! for starters, i'll be your friend so your not scared to make some new ones. To be honest, i went through the exact same thing as you did and it DOES hurt very bad. But once you find some people that are willing to make you feel better, you know you've chosen the right friends again
reply 1 day

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