Top 5 Confidence Boosters

Having confidence is the difference between feeling unstoppable and wishing no one will notice you. If you're tired of the latter and hoping to feel empowered and unstoppable at least some of the time, check out our top 5 confidence boosters that will instantly help you feel better about being in the spotlight (and may even encourage you to seek it out!)

#5 Find a role model

We are talking about a real person in your life -- not a supermodel, celebrity or pop star, but someone you know and admire. Someone who walks and talks with confidence, and whom you’re also comfortable with. It could be a friend, teacher, sibling, babysitter, aunt… as long as it’s someone you admire, respect, trust and already have a relationship with. You don’t have to recruit her to be your mentor or therapist. Simply ask her to keep you company shopping for back-to-school clothes, listen to you practice your debate speech, give you makeup advice or help you pick out some outfits from your closet.

#4 Find your Style

Steer clear of following any trend blindly and instead give any styles your own personal twist. Conforming and fitting in will just make you feel like everyone else. Fitting in but also having something that makes you unique will make you feel special. The best way we know how to do this is with a little makeover! Grab your BFF, older sibling, mom, or other confidence role model and schedule a head-to-toe image consulting. See what works about your look and what can use some updating, go through magazines or catalogs to see what styles catch your eye, and talk about what you love about yourself and what you'd like to change.

#3 Follow your Dreams

If you have a passion, an interest, a talent, or something that makes you tick, hold on tightly to it. Don’t give up because others say it’s unreasonable, unreachable or impractical. If you have a dream, find a way to nurture even a small part of it and make it a reality. Chip at it little by little each day, one brick at a time. Think it’s impossible? Well, as the White Queen in Alice in Wonderland said: “sometimes, I've believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast."

#2 Take Pride in your Looks

First off, practice good posture. Back straight, shoulders back, chin up and face the world head-on. Walking tall and straight makes you look – and feel – more confident. Having trouble remembering to stand straight? Try this: Every time you walk through a doorway, pull your shoulders back and look straight ahead. Make it a habit by practicing this a few times and you’ll have great posture within the week! Bonus points if you practice looking people in the eye when you speak -- not in a creepy, non-blinking, staring kind of way -- but in an "I am listening and I hear you" kind of way.

Next, clean up your act! Wash your hair as often as necessary for your hair type. There is no excuse for going to school (or anywhere) with greasy hair! Got frizzies? Tame your hair with leave-in conditioner, get the split ends of your hair trimmed often, even if you’re growing out your hair, and keep your hair (and fingernails, since we’re on the subject…) out of your mouth. Wear deodorant every day. Shower at least every other day. Wash your face morning and night and never skip brushing your teeth. Feeling good about how you look on the outside will make you more confident on the inside.

While you’re at it, take pride in your belongings and your surroundings, too. On your way out of your bedroom every morning, pull up the covers, straighten your bed, and always put your clothes away as you take them off. Ditch the habit of shoving papers into your backpack and throwing wrappers into your purse and take an extra few seconds to put things away properly. Taking care of yourself and your things shows you respect yourself, and when you look in the mirror, you’ll see and feel the difference!

#1 Love Yourself

“Focus on things you like about yourself,” suggests Glenn Wolff, a Social Worker and Family Therapist in Stamford, Connecticut. “Focus on your strengths and what you do well: a good violin player, lacrosse player, writing poetry…” whatever makes you unique, different or out of the ordinary makes you special. To remind you of that special quality you are proud of, find or create a symbol for it. It could be keeping a photo of someone who inspires you, a memento from a day that you were really proud of yourself, or a souvenir from a time you were at your happiest and most confident on hand to look at when you need it. Or it could be a secret symbol you draw or create with your hands when you need to find your inner power, self-love and confidence. One girl we spoke with secretly touches her thumbs and pointer fingers  together in the shape of a heart when something negative happens at school. “It reminds me that I love myself no matter what anyone else says or does, and that always keeps me going.”

Have your Say

What do you do to boost your confidence? Share your tips and tricks below!



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Dear Dish-It in the forums

EndlessDream posted in Friends:
Hmmm....Then she mustn't be necessarily "using" you, if she is not getting something in return ( As far as we know of). However, It does sound like she is being extremely unfair. That just might be how she is. Not exactly loyal to anyone. Well, try to talk to her about it and tell her how you feel. And, if it doesn't work out, then she might not be a great friend to hang around with, and maybe you will find someone else who enjoys your company. I hope this helps, and good luck :)
reply about 2 hours
XxIHateMathxX posted in Friends:
No not really. Like I said, one minute she's all smiley and then she doesn't even look at me. Most of the time I see her with Daniela and Andrea. Today she was asking me if I was going to hang out with her, Daniela, Andrea and Luisa during recess. When I told her that I was 'going to have to think' she was like, "Whatever." and ran off to catch up with the Threesome. Thanks. :)
reply about 2 hours
EndlessDream posted in Friends:
Is she asking you to do things for her? Like help with homework, carry her books and so on?
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XxIHateMathxX posted in Friends:
This is gonna be long:   I have this 'friend' Amelia. She and I bonded really fast last year and we've become inseparable.   But lately she's blowing me off and my other best friend Belen told me: Amelia is actually using you. She does this to new kids at school, especially from foreign countries. She thinks because you're Chinese and the Chinese teacher's daughter, you'll help her. She's also using you as a backup friend - a substitute. There's this new girl Daniela, who Amelia thinks is her new best friend. She thinks that when Daniela stop hanging out with her, she'll have you.   The thing is, Daniela is pretty nice and she probably doesn't know all the trouble she's causing. Belen's old 'best friend' Andrea is doing the same to her.   I also learned that Amelia is seemingly the 'most popular girl in school' because she's mean to everyone. She always passes by the little kids' classrooms and hugs them & stuff. They seem to love her, but now I know it's because they think if they're nice they won't get bullied.   Maybe she WAS using me but I dunno. Belen says that each kid in the entire school has a bad story about Amelia and something she did to them. I said, "Then how was she so nice to me last year?" Then Belen was all like, "She was using you."   I don't know if she's telling the truth. She and Amelia are deadly enemies and she might be making up the whole Amelia story just to get back at her. Although Amelia has been dropping a few signs that she IS using me as a substitute friend.   Sometimes when I walk in, she'll be like "OOOOHHH! CASSANDRA! HI! HOW ARE YOU! C'MON, LOOK AT THIS! WE'RE GONNA HAVE SOOOO MUCH FUN TOGETHER ..."   And other times I'm like, "Hey, Amelia!" and she says, "Oh. Huh? Yeah, hi ..."  Once during PE we had to sit down and on the way to the gym, she was chatting with me in a BBBBFFFF way. But then when we had to partner up she said with Andrea, Daniela and someone else who I forgot.   I don't know what to do. It's just so weird. Even though now I know she MIGHT be using me (I'm not sure if she really is) it just seems WEIRD. Even for a supposed ##### she was my possibly fake best friend for the whole of last year. It's WEIRD to suddenly switch.   I don't even know if this should be happening. We've only just started 5th grade. Doesn't this WEIRD #### start happening around middle school? Thank you, everyone who will help in advance. P.S. Please include flirting advice. - A Girl Who Might Just Lose Her Possibly Fake Best Friend
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Okay I have school today and my hair is not sitting how I want it to. But my mum says it is sitting fine WHEN ITS NOT! SHE IS NOT LISTENING what do i do?
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