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Dear Dish-it: How Do I Get A Boyfriend?

Mar 17, 2013

Dear Dish-it,

I can't get a boyfriend! I want one but no one likes me. I don't know what to do about this. Please tell me how to get a boyfriend.

Forever Alone

Dear Forever Alone,

First of all, let me assure you that you won't be alone forever. Just the fact that you're open to finding a boyfriend means that, eventually, one will come along. But there's a difference between being open to love and being desperate for it. Have you ever heard people say that they can never find something until they stop looking? The same applies to relationships. Sometimes, when you look too hard, you come off as desperate, and that will repel potential boyfriends.

Make Friends

You say that nobody likes you. How do you know for sure? Maybe there's a guy at school who secretly has a crush on you. If you know for a fact that no one likes you, that means you've probably been asking them out and getting rejected. Try to appear more easygoing. Stop worrying so much about getting a boyfriend. Get to know guys, possibly even as friends, and then it could turn into more.

Worth The Wait

You shouldn't be so concerned with getting just any boyfriend. Relationships are based on mutual affection. One day you'll find someone that you truly have feelings for, and he'll have those feelings for you. It may not be soon, but trust me, when you do find him, it'll be worth the wait!

Try Something New

For now, focus on the other positive things in your life: your family, your friends, your favorite hobbies. Try participating in a new sport or community activity. It's a great way to meet new friends (and potentially a boyfriend), as well as expand your horizons. It will make your life feel more full and enriching. Sometimes the desperate need for a relationship really stems from the feeling that something is missing from your life. Something fun or challenging. Something to keep you busy. So give it a try. And while doing this, keep yourself open to a relationship, but don't tell yourself that you need a boyfriend. Remember, no girl needs a guy to make her happy.

Have Your Say

Do you have any advice for Forever Alone? Tell us in our comment section below!

 

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Poll

Who's More Important - BF or BFF?

  • Your BFF is way more important.
  • You gotta stay loyal to your BF.
  • They are equally important.
  • I guess it depends on your situation.

Dear Dish-It In The Forums

drowning
"SatanslilDemon" wrote: Ok so I have a dilemma. I really, and I mean really like this guy. He's considerate of my mental wellbeing and health, plus he's really funny and sweet. He's respectful, loyal, and his hugs are the best ever(he's like a foot and 4 inches taller than me). the dilemma is, he'stwentyandI'mfifteenturningsixteensoon.... I'm not gonna even ask about dating him until i'm sixteen but I've called him in total anxiety attack crying my eyes out and he calmed me down and made me laugh, and I invited him to come see a choir performance so he spent the day with me... My mom ships us... but I'm a little worried because of the age difference  and experience difference and just, I don't want to miss the chance of being with him because of it. ​  any advice??? It's really nice that your mother supports it, that always helps!! I'm glad that your family enjoys his company as well. Being 16 while he's 20 is alright. It's a slight odd age gap. But, I think as long as you both are ready, it's alright. Make sure you're mature and safe with your choices though. Personally, I think you should wait until you're closer to at least, 17. But, as long as you two are smart about what you're doing, it should be alright when it come around to it.
reply about 7 hours
fitta
"Shygirl15" wrote:I really like this boy in my second period class but i dont know how to tell him because he knows that im transgender do whatever makes you feel comfortable or just wing it and tell him and if he tells you something because you're trans forget about him! He doesn't deserve you. But it's totally okay if you want to play it safe and not go up to him. You do you. :3 
reply about 8 hours
fitta
"SatanslilDemon" wrote: Ok so I have a dilemma. I really, and I mean really like this guy. He's considerate of my mental wellbeing and health, plus he's really funny and sweet. He's respectful, loyal, and his hugs are the best ever(he's like a foot and 4 inches taller than me). the dilemma is, he'stwentyandI'mfifteenturningsixteensoon.... I'm not gonna even ask about dating him until i'm sixteen but I've called him in total anxiety attack crying my eyes out and he calmed me down and made me laugh, and I invited him to come see a choir performance so he spent the day with me... My mom ships us... but I'm a little worried because of the age difference  and experience difference and just, I don't want to miss the chance of being with him because of it. ​  any advice??? i suggest you wait i mean you are going to be 16 that's way too young to be dating someone who is 4/5 years older than you,no? You can still talk to him when it comes to your anxiety attacks and all of that because I have those too every night so I know how it feels, but maybe you should wait. But at the end of the day it's your decision I'm just here to give advice 
reply about 8 hours
SatanslilDemon
Ok so I have a dilemma. I really, and I mean really like this guy. He's considerate of my mental wellbeing and health, plus he's really funny and sweet. He's respectful, loyal, and his hugs are the best ever(he's like a foot and 4 inches taller than me). the dilemma is, he'stwentyandI'mfifteenturningsixteensoon.... I'm not gonna even ask about dating him until i'm sixteen but I've called him in total anxiety attack crying my eyes out and he calmed me down and made me laugh, and I invited him to come see a choir performance so he spent the day with me... My mom ships us... but I'm a little worried because of the age difference  and experience difference and just, I don't want to miss the chance of being with him because of it. ​  any advice???
reply about 9 hours
SmartSunnyShadow
I feel like that too. My best friend will always hang out with her 'new friends' that I have a really bad opinion about. My friend will treat me rudely all the time and sometimes make fun of me with her friends. But, when I needed her the most in my life, she was there for me, and I told her how I felt. She says that she just wants to hang out with more people and apologized, people can be a little teasy at times.  Also, after seeing each other for a long time, people make new friends and start hanging out with them more, it doesn't mean that she doesn't like you.  This may be different for you, but just tell her about it, she will have to know you feelings at one point.  Hope I helped you. 
reply about 15 hours