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Dear Dish-It: Desperate For A Boyfriend

Dear Dish-It,


My mom won't let me have a boyfriend until after college. I don't think it is right. I am currently IN LOVE. I don't know what to do. My cousin is two years older than me and she says I should only have a boyfriend when I am her age – that’s in two years for cryin' out loud! I can't wait that long! Should I date my love without tellin' my parents or just wait for more than 10 years to get a boyfriend? I’m very desperate to get one!


TheGirlWhoIsDesperateToGetABoyfriend or TGWIDTGAB


Dear TGWIDTGAB,


I wonder why your parents feel the way they do about dating? Have you and your parents actually sat down and discussed dating? Such a discussion would give your parents the opportunity to explain why they have concerns about dating at an early age. Such a discussion also would give you the opportunity to bring out some important points, such as the following.


1. Dating is an important part of growing up. It allows the adolescent to gain experience and social skills that actually will be helpful in avoiding risky situations in the future. You might explain that learning to deal with boys now might actually help you keep relationships appropriate.


2. Dating gives an adolescent the opportunity to form friendships with the opposite sex and to gain understanding of what boys are like. Actually, it is important to experience some of these relationships in order to make wise decisions about really important partnerships like MARRIAGE. Dating is learning how to know the difference between a not-so-good relationship and a really good (awesome) relationship that hopefully could be permanent.


3. It would be great to be able to go to mom and dad for advice during some of these dating experiences...again, preparing you for adult relationships.


4. It would be great to be able to call home for a ride if things get out of hand. This might not be possible if you have had no dating experience and start dating after you’re on your own (college or job). The best time for such discussions is before you start dating.


If you've got a burning question, need some love advice or find yourself thinking about things like sex, depression, self-esteem, boyfriends, girlfriends, best friends, bullying or peer pressure, don't hesitate to Dish-It here. Send your questions to deardish@kidzworld.com. And if you hang out in the chat rooms with other Kidzworld members who know you by your username, just send in your secret question using a different nickname if you want to stay anonymous – we promise that no one will ever know it's you. Remember: Dish-It gets a load of letters every day so it may take a while to reply to yours. Keep checking back for her reply, or watch for answered Dish-It questions that are similar to your own.


More Great Advice:

  • My Cheating Ex Is dating My BFF
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  • I’m Going Crazy Without A GF
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    Dear Dish-It In The Forums

    Kirsteeeeen
    This thread has been moved. Click here to see the new thread.
    reply 1 day
    Isabellax
    @nrfvltmrdftw06  :p :p
    reply 2 days
    nrfrvltmrdftw06
     @isabellax same
    reply 2 days
    Ashleexo
    Ashleexo posted in Family Issues:
    "Sophieex_" wrote:I'm not afraid of either of my parents. But if I could choose, my mom. I'm also not afraid of either of my parents at anytime.  But when I was 13 and under and in trouble, it would be my dad.
    reply 2 days
    country_girl19
    If you really want to get rid of the romantic feelings for him, just try picturing a future with him, and also asking these questions in your head, "Is he a good guy?" "Would we last?" But maybe he's acting awkward around you, because your friend asked him to Prom, but he might rather go with you, but doesn't know how to say anything about the situation. I would suggest talking to him about it, and if he is a jerk about it, don't bother. But talk to him first, and if he has the same feelings, then talk to your friend about it. I just want to warn you, that if you do this, you and others could get their feelings hurt. Crushes are a risky, scary thing in high school. Anyway, that's what I think you should do. If you don't want to do that, then follow what your intuition tells you.
    reply 3 days