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Dear Dish-it: My Boyfriend and I Don't Talk

Jul 12, 2013

Dear Dish-it,

I've been going out with a boy from my class for a few weeks now. He's fun and talkative when we're in a group, but when we're alone, he barely talks. All we do is watch movies or kissIt's so awkward! Please help me!

Desperate for Convo

Dear Desperate for Convo,

New relationships are often awkward. It usually takes a while for both partners to feel comfortable enough to open up. Some people talk non-stop to avoid awkward silences, while others don't know how to fill them. It sounds like your relationship is the latter.

Talk About Him

All it takes is the right question to get the ball rolling. Most guys like to talk about themselves (who doesn't?!), so ask him about his life, his friendships, his family, the sports he plays or enjoys, the TV shows he watches, or even the food he eats at home! Even shy guys can talk your ear off if you give them the right topic. 

Reminisce

If that doesn't work, bring up a situation from your past when you were both present: a funny moment in class, something you did with your group of friends, the troublemaker's latest attention-grab at school, your teacher's funny habits or the projects you're working on in class.

Play A Game

If he's still tongue-tied, suggest an activity that would require him to use his words. Put the movie aside and bust out a board game like Clue or Monopoly or, best of all, Cranium. That way you'll have to play charades, sing some humdingers as well as read and answer questions. 

Be Honest

Still not working? If you've tried everything and he's still not responding, it's time to be honest. Come clean. Tell him that you want to get to know him better, but you're having a hard time. Tell him that for your relationship to grow, you need to communicate. After all, open communication is the cornerstone of a relationship. If he has a problem with that, maybe it's time to find someone new.

Have Your Say

Do you have any advice for Desperate for Convo? Tell us in our comment section below!

 

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Comments

Cheygirl731

Cheygirl731 wrote:

But just not enough or not about anything
commented: Tue Jul 29, 2014

Cheygirl731

Cheygirl731 wrote:

But just not enough or not about anything
commented: Tue Jul 29, 2014

Sweetie924

Sweetie924 wrote:

We Talk .. But
commented: Tue Jul 29, 2014

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Dear Dish-It in the forums

kaykay2002
kaykay2002 posted in Friends:
"Wooper1255" wrote:No. Just no. Mr. Face does not approve this. ._.Okay, okay, let's get serious.Your best friend BULLYING you? And loves it when you get mad? What the heck? SHE'S NOT EVEN YOUR FRIEND!You should have a talk with your best friend. No seriously, she doesn't have any friends cause she's a bully and no one likes to be friends with a bully...You should tell your best friend that she NEEDS to change her attitude! She needs to be more nicer to others also.Also, a best friend is: Caring, Kind, Loyal, Nice, Thoughtful, and will stand up for you against bullies, will be there if you're upset, maybe they'll even CRY with you!A best friend is totally NOT: Someone who bullies you, Someone who likes it when your madYou should ask her any of the following questions:Are you Okay?Why are you bullying me? You're my friend.Is something wrong like family issues?Questions like that are good because there may be a reason for bullying. She could be suffering from depression, or is confused or lonely. Just talk to her. Have a discussion with her. Also, you should talk to other people. Ask them why they aren't friends with your best friend. Then maybe, after they tell you what they don't like about her, you can go back to your best friend and tell her the things she needs to improve on. Also, if necessary, tell an adult like your mom, a teacher, consular, or her mom.Whatever you think will solve this conflict between you and your best friend well... just go for it. But think about the outcome too.Hope I helped, I might add some tips and suggestions to you. :3  your right and the only reason I have put up with her this long is because her dad died but I cant stand her anymore so but seriously I feel like there is another reason bcuz she has had people confront her saying "u know what I have put up wit this for a while and I have told u to stop and u don't listen and I know your dad died but that doesn't mean u can treat people like that "  but she still does it and for the past 3 yrs. I have put up with it but not anymore I will talk to her about it. Thanks.
reply about 7 hours
Wooper1255
Wooper1255 posted in Friends:
You NEED to tell your parents or HER parents about her attitude, this is abuse from your OWN best friend! Tell an adult, don't be afraid, it's not even SILLY to tell an adult, this is serious, she is HURTING you! Tell someone before things get out of hand and she REALLY hurts you! D=
reply about 8 hours
Wooper1255
Wooper1255 posted in Friends:
No. Just no. Mr. Face does not approve this. ._. Okay, okay, let's get serious. Your best friend BULLYING you? And loves it when you get mad? What the heck? SHE'S NOT EVEN YOUR FRIEND! You should have a talk with your best friend. No seriously, she doesn't have any friends cause she's a bully and no one likes to be friends with a bully... You should tell your best friend that she NEEDS to change her attitude! She needs to be more nicer to others also. Also, a best friend is: Caring, Kind, Loyal, Nice, Thoughtful, and will stand up for you against bullies, will be there if you're upset, maybe they'll even CRY with you! A best friend is totally NOT: Someone who bullies you, Someone who likes it when your mad You should ask her any of the following questions: Are you Okay? Why are you bullying me? You're my friend. Is something wrong like family issues? Questions like that are good because there may be a reason for bullying. She could be suffering from depression, or is confused or lonely. Just talk to her. Have a discussion with her. Also, you should talk to other people. Ask them why they aren't friends with your best friend. Then maybe, after they tell you what they don't like about her, you can go back to your best friend and tell her the things she needs to improve on. Also, if necessary, tell an adult like your mom, a teacher, consular, or her mom. Whatever you think will solve this conflict between you and your best friend well... just go for it. But think about the outcome too. Hope I helped, I might add some tips and suggestions to you. :3
reply about 8 hours
Boysrock50
Boysrock50 posted in Friends:
Yeah I had a friend in the same situation as you, he was too scared to say anything so we spoke for him. Now the 'friend' has changed and hes our mate. Just tell her straight and firmly, its the only way
reply about 8 hours
kaykay2002
kaykay2002 posted in Friends:
"Boysrock50" wrote:She is obviously NOT your best friend.I wouldn't even call her a friendShe is a bully who thinks she can have her own wayShe thinks she can control you like you're her follower because she the truth is she needs youBe smart and leave her because she's only going to keep you down and then one day she will find  friends just like her and she will just ignore you forever, thinking shes too cool for you.I would either:Tell her straight that she needs to make her own friends because you don't want to be friends anymoreor:Tell her that you don't like what she does and either she changes her ways and acts more like a friend, or you cant be friends anymore.I'm not trying to be harsh, I'm being wise and you should be wise too. Thanks I actually might try that but she is really stubborn and will not take no for an answer I have tried just ignoring her but he will kick, hit, or punch me to get attention. my parents also don't like her bcuz she is bossy. I also have to go to summer camp with her for the next 2 weeks and w have to be buddies for it so i think i might die
reply about 8 hours

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