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Dear Dish-It, I Want To Date My BFF

Dear Dish-It,

Me and my BFF (who is a boy) have been told that we should go out so many times by other kids at school, but I don't know if he likes me in that way. I would love to go out with him, but I don't want to wreck our friendship. We've been round to each other’s houses loads, gone into town together, but does he like-like me???

DesperateCrush


Dear DesperateCrush,


Only one person can tell you if he “like-likes” you beyond friendship, and that’s your BFF himself. However, BEFORE you go ahead and tell him how you really feel, I have a bit of advice for you.


The first thing is, you need to sit down and have a long, hard think about the possible outcome of telling your best friend you like him or asking him if he likes you. And that is the possible end of your close friendship. If he doesn’t feel the deeper feelings you feel toward him, he may get scared and distance himself from you.


Of course, the opposite could be true, too. You could have the conversation with him and get a positive answer back. Which would be great, except it’s really not 100% guaranteed, is it?


What about casually bringing up the fact that other kids at school have been commenting on your close friendship and saying the two of you should be boyfriend and girlfriend? You could bring it up with him as a casual conversation with no strings attached and ask him how he feels about the rumours. The trick is not to let on how you feel until he tells you how he feels about it first. Maybe you could get a better understanding of his feelings about the situation this way?


Of course, he could be equally scared that you don’t like him back as more than a friend and keep his feelings bottled up. My best advice to you is to keep your radar on and try your best to feel out the situation without directly telling him your true feelings until you know his. You may be able to tell if he likes you or not by his body language, words and actions.


So, ya gotta burnin' question? Need some love directions? Thinkin' 'bout stuff like depression, sex,how ya feel 'bout YOURSELF (that's called "self-esteem"), boyfriends, girlfriends, losin' old friends, bullyin' or peer pressure, but too scared to ask the parents? Don't be scared to Dish-It here. Send all of your questions to deardish@kidzworld.com But 'member, if ya hang out in Chat with other Kidzworld members who know ya by your 'username', ya might wanna use a secret nickname when ya write in. That way no one'll ever know it's you. And, just in case ya don't know, Dish-It gets a lotta letters everyday, and she can't answer 'em all. So keep checkin' the column cuz she's prob'ly answerin' somethin' very similar to your question while you're out doin' somethin' else. K? And Thanks! Ya keep her outta trouble. Oh! And if ya've got words of wisdom you wanna share,We'll dish 'em up, too.


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  • 51 Comments

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    Dear Dish-It in the forums

    -Gwen9--
    -Gwen9-- posted in Friends:
    "jordand08" wrote:Thank you.You're welcome. :)
    reply about 4 hours
    donteatcarrots
    talk to the person you're closest too. yes, you said you don't get close with people, but there's probably one person who you speak to more often than others- talk to that person.
    reply about 6 hours
    donteatcarrots
    donteatcarrots posted in Friends:
    Don't worry too much- it's only your first relationship- but I'd sit down with him at one point, and discuss what makes you uncomfortable, eg; if you know what I mean...
    reply about 6 hours
    donteatcarrots
    donteatcarrots posted in Friends:
    Probably sound a little stereotypical, but the majority of boys don't really act like that... Ask him :p
    reply about 6 hours
    kittenkid
    First: WHATEVER YOU DO, DON'T KILL YOUSELF! When you get past this you'll be glad. Well, this is just my opinion, but I think you should first find someone, anyone, even if you don't trust them, if there're your parents talk to them about it. I bet a bunch of people have already told you this but there're right. Before you walk up to them, write down what you're going to say and then think of a few questions they might ask and write down the answers to them. Remember to tell them that it might take you a minute to think of an answer. Before you answer, think of the exact words you will say  before you say anything, and think in your mind about it. Think about wether it is a lie or not before you say it. If it gets out of you mouth before you realize it is a lie, don't be afraid to say so and just say the truth. Also, just try to find something you like to do that will take your mind off everything. If you really can't think of anything, try just practicing saying your feelings to yourself, or a pillow or something.  Hope this helps!
    reply about 8 hours

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