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Dear Dish-It: My BFF's GF Hates Me

Dear Dish-It,

I’m a girl with a best friend who’s a guy. The problem is, his girlfriend doesn't like me and tries to make it hard for me to be around him. Once she told him to choose between me and her! He told her goodbye, but then they got back together. She’s not hateful to me all the time – I try to get along with her but it’s not always easy. When she’s mean, I usually just stay away from her – and my BFF comes with me, since he doesn’t like the way she acts, either. I’m totally frustrated with this situation – what should I do?

Confused Friend


Dear CF,


It seems to me like you’re stuck between a rock and a hard place (as the saying goes). On the one side, you want to stay close with your best friend and hang out with him. On the other side, he’s got what sounds like a very jealous girlfriend (jealous either of you or of your close friendship with her boyfriend – your BFF) who would rather you have nothing to do with her man. What do you do?


The answer is nothing. There’s nothing you can do and nothing you should do in this situation. Your best friend has chosen to be in a relationship with this girl, and you need to respect that (especially if he means as much to you as you say he does). You must be careful not to do anything that puts you in the middle of them or their relationship – which means stay out of it and stay away!


I’m sorry to be harsh, but this is the reality of the situation. Until your best friend decides to break up with his girlfriend (and, since it’s happened once before, I wouldn't be surprised to see it happen again, sooner or later) or she starts liking you and accepting your friendship with her man, you need to keep your nose out of their business and let their relationship run its course naturally – or you may be in jeopardy of losing a friend forever.


So, ya gotta burnin' question? Need some love directions? Thinkin' 'bout stuff like depression, sex,how ya feel 'bout YOURSELF (that's called "self-esteem"), boyfriends, girlfriends, losin' old friends, bullyin' or peer pressure, but too scared to ask the parents? Don't be scared to Dish-It here. Send all of your questions to deardish@kidzworld.com But 'member, if ya hang out in Chat with other Kidzworld members who know ya by your 'username', ya might wanna use a secret nickname when ya write in. That way no one'll ever know it's you. And, just in case ya don't know, Dish-It gets a lotta letters everyday, and she can't answer 'em all. So keep checkin' the column cuz she's prob'ly answerin' somethin' very similar to your question while you're out doin' somethin' else. K? And Thanks! Ya keep her outta trouble. Oh! And if ya've got words of wisdom you wanna share,We'll dish 'em up, too.




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    Dear Dish-It in the forums

    AnneS12
    AnneS12 posted in Family Issues:
    Well That is your choice who you want to stay with.Nobody can force you about it.When your parents see a family<a data-cke-saved-href=" lawyer, then he will ask you whom do you want to stay with and jury will decide.So dont worry .
    reply about 23 hours
    worldqweencc
    worldqweencc posted in Friends:
    I'm not quiet sure what's a real friend and what's a fake one anymore. I know when there's a friend who's only a school friend rather than an 'outside' friend as well, but at the same time it makes me so confused. Here's my story: There's a girl named Xian. We had a unique way of becoming friends ... but it clicked. For the whole year I've been trying to keep in contact with her ... but she's not very willing to try and put in any effort to stay in contact with me. Her personality is beyond sweet, and her skills at art are even better. If she was to have an award, it would be a giant trophy with her face plastered on it and big bold letters listing 'Nicest Girl In The World!' ... Its just ... she lied to me.  I was all about this friendship. I was ... i'll admit ... sort of a lost puppy following around her owner.  So, I got her this T-Shirt she really wanted for her birthday, and not long her birthday was mine, April First. I was expecting at least a letter, or maybe even something cheap. It didn't really matter to me.  But on my birthday she didn't even come to school. Nor when she got back did she ever say sorry, or give me any be-lated gift of any sort.  That should have been my first clue. Even my mother started catching on. My second clue was she even told me she was oblivious and wasn't good at keeping in contact. I thought she was joking. How could a friendship so sweet be tossed out just like that? My third one was near the end of school, one of her friends in elementary was bragging about the plushies she got from Xian. Apparently she had four from her.  Xian had originally told me it was AGAINST her religion to give out gifts to other people. I knew she wasn't lying about her religion in general, because I met her mom on a field trip and she was quiet ... different. But I didn't understand why Xian had gotten so many small plushies for her, and yet not a single small stamp for me? My last clue was the last day of school. She didn't even try to say good-bye or even hang out with me for that matter. I know what you're thinking. "Girl, you've gotta be kidding me if you can't see that she has no intention of being your friend!" But this girl was the nicest to me. She stood next to me during harsh times, and comforted me when I was down. She told me I was important.  And you don't get many friends to do those special things to you. It was rare to have a friend make me feel so tall and worthy.  ... So ... I can't understand ... why'd she do all that .... and suddenly ... just ... walk away ...
    reply 1 day
    catsandpizza
    catsandpizza posted in Style:
    American Apparel croptop, Juicy Couture velvet sweatpants and Uggs
    reply 2 days
    Heyyyyy_
    Heyyyyy_ posted in Friends:
    "donteatcarrots" wrote:I dunno, looks like something more than being friends is going on here. It's probably best to ask her face-to-face though, before jumping to conclusions. ^^^
    reply 2 days
    catsandpizza
    catsandpizza posted in Friends:
    depends 
    reply 2 days

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