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Dear Dish-It: My BFF's GF Hates Me

Dear Dish-It,

I’m a girl with a best friend who’s a guy. The problem is, his girlfriend doesn't like me and tries to make it hard for me to be around him. Once she told him to choose between me and her! He told her goodbye, but then they got back together. She’s not hateful to me all the time – I try to get along with her but it’s not always easy. When she’s mean, I usually just stay away from her – and my BFF comes with me, since he doesn’t like the way she acts, either. I’m totally frustrated with this situation – what should I do?

Confused Friend


Dear CF,


It seems to me like you’re stuck between a rock and a hard place (as the saying goes). On the one side, you want to stay close with your best friend and hang out with him. On the other side, he’s got what sounds like a very jealous girlfriend (jealous either of you or of your close friendship with her boyfriend – your BFF) who would rather you have nothing to do with her man. What do you do?


The answer is nothing. There’s nothing you can do and nothing you should do in this situation. Your best friend has chosen to be in a relationship with this girl, and you need to respect that (especially if he means as much to you as you say he does). You must be careful not to do anything that puts you in the middle of them or their relationship – which means stay out of it and stay away!


I’m sorry to be harsh, but this is the reality of the situation. Until your best friend decides to break up with his girlfriend (and, since it’s happened once before, I wouldn't be surprised to see it happen again, sooner or later) or she starts liking you and accepting your friendship with her man, you need to keep your nose out of their business and let their relationship run its course naturally – or you may be in jeopardy of losing a friend forever.


So, ya gotta burnin' question? Need some love directions? Thinkin' 'bout stuff like depression, sex,how ya feel 'bout YOURSELF (that's called "self-esteem"), boyfriends, girlfriends, losin' old friends, bullyin' or peer pressure, but too scared to ask the parents? Don't be scared to Dish-It here. Send all of your questions to deardish@kidzworld.com But 'member, if ya hang out in Chat with other Kidzworld members who know ya by your 'username', ya might wanna use a secret nickname when ya write in. That way no one'll ever know it's you. And, just in case ya don't know, Dish-It gets a lotta letters everyday, and she can't answer 'em all. So keep checkin' the column cuz she's prob'ly answerin' somethin' very similar to your question while you're out doin' somethin' else. K? And Thanks! Ya keep her outta trouble. Oh! And if ya've got words of wisdom you wanna share,We'll dish 'em up, too.




More Dish-It Advice:

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  • 3 Comments

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    Dear Dish-It in the forums

    HannahG
    HannahG posted in Family Issues:
    Talk to your parents about it. Tell them you didn't like your Christmas gift, and don't let your brother boss you around. Your parents can, your brother can't. Your parents gave you life, sorry to tell you but they can do anything they want if it's legal. But your brother can't. Let your parents know that you shouldn't have gotten in trouble for the stuff he doesn't. Tell them he makes you feel really awful and you don't like it. If they're good people they'll understand.
    reply about 6 hours
    HannahG
    HannahG posted in Friends:
    I would stop being friends with her. I mean she should understand that it'd be mean to do that. It's hard to help your friend get through a breakup when you're dating the same person. Plus you don't even know if she was trying to break you guys up so she could be with him.
    reply about 6 hours
    HannahG
    HannahG posted in Friends:
    You want to know if he likes you or not? Just ask him. It's not as bad as people say-I mean, it's a question. It looks like he does, so he probably does. It's not that big of a deal.
    reply about 6 hours
    HannahG
    HannahG posted in Friends:
    Talk to your friend. Tell her that this is the first guy that's ever liked you but you don't want her to get mad at you for stealing him from her. But understand she likes him too so don't get mad if she doesn't want you dating him. Nicely decide which of you should get him instead of the other. Chances are she might be thinking the same thing.
    reply about 6 hours
    Nisya-
    Nisya- posted in Style:
    messy bun. :3
    reply about 9 hours

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