Dear Dish-It: My BFF's GF Hates Me

Dear Dish-It,

I’m a girl with a best friend who’s a guy. The problem is, his girlfriend doesn't like me and tries to make it hard for me to be around him. Once she told him to choose between me and her! He told her goodbye, but then they got back together. She’s not hateful to me all the time – I try to get along with her but it’s not always easy. When she’s mean, I usually just stay away from her – and my BFF comes with me, since he doesn’t like the way she acts, either. I’m totally frustrated with this situation – what should I do?

Confused Friend

Dear CF,

It seems to me like you’re stuck between a rock and a hard place (as the saying goes). On the one side, you want to stay close with your best friend and hang out with him. On the other side, he’s got what sounds like a very jealous girlfriend (jealous either of you or of your close friendship with her boyfriend – your BFF) who would rather you have nothing to do with her man. What do you do?

The answer is nothing. There’s nothing you can do and nothing you should do in this situation. Your best friend has chosen to be in a relationship with this girl, and you need to respect that (especially if he means as much to you as you say he does). You must be careful not to do anything that puts you in the middle of them or their relationship – which means stay out of it and stay away!

I’m sorry to be harsh, but this is the reality of the situation. Until your best friend decides to break up with his girlfriend (and, since it’s happened once before, I wouldn't be surprised to see it happen again, sooner or later) or she starts liking you and accepting your friendship with her man, you need to keep your nose out of their business and let their relationship run its course naturally – or you may be in jeopardy of losing a friend forever.

So, ya gotta burnin' question? Need some love directions? Thinkin' 'bout stuff like depression, sex,how ya feel 'bout YOURSELF (that's called "self-esteem"), boyfriends, girlfriends, losin' old friends, bullyin' or peer pressure, but too scared to ask the parents? Don't be scared to Dish-It here. Send all of your questions to But 'member, if ya hang out in Chat with other Kidzworld members who know ya by your 'username', ya might wanna use a secret nickname when ya write in. That way no one'll ever know it's you. And, just in case ya don't know, Dish-It gets a lotta letters everyday, and she can't answer 'em all. So keep checkin' the column cuz she's prob'ly answerin' somethin' very similar to your question while you're out doin' somethin' else. K? And Thanks! Ya keep her outta trouble. Oh! And if ya've got words of wisdom you wanna share,We'll dish 'em up, too.

More Dish-It Advice:

  • It Really Hurt My Friend
  • How Do I Know If He Likes Me?
  • My BFF’s Ex Likes Me
  • I Cry Over Him
  • More Great Advice from Dish-It!

    latest videos


    How Often Do You Hang With Your BFF?

    • 24/7!
    • At least once a day.
    • A couple times a week after school.
    • Once a week - if we're lucky.

    related stories

    I'm pretty popular at school and my GF's not. I'm not trying to sound like a jer...

    Dear Dish-It in the forums

    Polarbear816 posted in Friends:
    Yeah me too
    reply about 2 hours
    pwetty576 posted in Friends:
    i do not have a best friend =( =( =(
    reply about 2 hours
    smartysatya posted in Friends:
    Emily164 , The_Stunner, Smilesapart, analissa , rida , etc etc etc
    reply about 3 hours
    kittenmeeoows posted in Friends:
    im about to move to the biggest school in the  state from like the smallest what do i do will i fit in 
    reply about 15 hours
    fake_smiles posted in Friends:
    Okay so basically I used to go to this school and I met some of the people who I wish to be life long friends with. Problem: All of them go to a different school Problem: I go to a dumb boarding school and only get to spend 1 day and a half with them when i come back on fridays before I leave to go to school on Sundays. I really hate this school too. My sister graduated high school from here and my other sister is in her last year here. After this year I'm going to be all alone at this school. I'll have to be going here for the next seven years since its a middle and high school and I'm only in middle school. Plus my sisters are the best students there. Every time I tell people I'm the sister of Stephanie and Siri,they automatically have high expectations of me. But mainly,I just want to know how to keep in touch with my best friends. We can't even have phones at school so I can't talk to them during the week. [s:sm3/1jw0]
    reply about 16 hours

    play online games