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Dear Dish-It: My Friend Is Acting Jealous

Dear Dish-It,

I’ve had a really good friend in my life for the past two years. I value and appreciate her so much. My mom even says she’s her third daughter. But ever since I started hanging out with a new girl in my class my old friend has been acting jealous. I tried talking to her about it, but she yelled at me and said she hates my new friend. I don’t think she has any right to tell me who to hang out with but I don’t want to lose her as a friend. How do I make this better?

HNH


Dear HNH,


Dealing with a jealous friend isn't easy. It can be downright frustrating. Find out how to make the best of the situation, be fair to yourself and your friend, and, if possible, preserve the friendship. It can be done!


If you’re sure the jealousy is coming from the fact that you’ve started to become close to another girl, try to be empathetic: Imagine you're your friend or how you'd feel in the same situation.


Try not to say or do things that will make your friend feel frustrated. This will only fan the flames of the jealousy.


It’s perfectly OK to show that you're happy about your new friendship and your life in general, but be sure to show interest and excitement about things going on in your friend's life, too.


Sometimes jealousy is mixed with a lot of anger. If your efforts to listen to your friend and encourage her aren't working, give her some time to cool off. She may need to work out their feelings alone or with someone who's not the object of her jealousy.


Recruit some extra support for yourself, too: Another friend or a relative may be able to help you sort out your feelings about being the object of your friend's jealousy. A lot of people feel bad about making someone else jealous, so be sure to remind yourself why you're a good person, too!


So, ya gotta burnin' question? Need some love directions? Thinkin' 'bout stuff like depression, sex,how ya feel 'bout YOURSELF (that's called "self-esteem"), boyfriends, girlfriends, losin' old friends, bullyin' or peer pressure, but too scared to ask the parents? Don't be scared to Dish-It here. Send all of your questions to deardish@kidzworld.com But 'member, if ya hang out in Chat with other Kidzworld members who know ya by your 'username', ya might wanna use a secret nickname when ya write in. That way no one'll ever know it's you. And, just in case ya don't know, Dish-It gets a lotta letters everyday, and she can't answer 'em all. So keep checkin' the column cuz she's prob'ly answerin' somethin' very similar to your question while you're out doin' somethin' else. K? And Thanks! Ya keep her outta trouble. Oh! And if ya've got words of wisdom you wanna share,We'll dish 'em up, too.




More Dish-It Advice:

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    Dear Dish-It In The Forums

    Cutepandicorn
    Don't hate your little sister. You're lucky you have one. I wish I have one. I have 3 older brothers. I do things like that to them if they ignore me and don't play with me because I feel left out and I want attention. Maybe your sister is doing that so you hang with her more.
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    labimba posted in Style:
    Neko girl I have to get back in shape for September if u want we can be training buddies!  :)  
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    animallover468
    animallover468 posted in Style:
    EndlessDream is right. Skipping breakfast and lunch can result in stomach ulcers and sudden weight gain (had personal experience...), ESPECIALLY skipping breakfast! You have to incorporate exercise in your daily routine. Stomach and body fat is mostly caused by lack of exercise, and maybe that means you need to do toning exercises. Try doing simple exercise videos like the 3-mile powerwalk on YouTube (trust me, I sweat like crazy when I do those workouts). Anything that gets you sweating, is the kind of exercise you need to do.  I hated working out when I first started my weight loss journey too. I would always start wheezing every time I started working out. But after pushing through everyday, I think working out is one of the best stress busters I've ever had!  If you want to lower your appetite though, I suggest eating a full lunch and breakfast and skipping your dinner. If you can't skip dinner, then at least try aiming for an early dinner, around 5:30 or 6:00. Your body needs time to digest at least 4 hours before you sleep. I started gaining weight around puberty when I was 12, it could be the same for you too.  But honestly, there's nothing wrong with having consciousness about your weight. Now starving yourself and dieting is BAD, but there's nothing wrong with changing your lifestyle in order to be fit. It's a good thing that kids start caring about their health, and the earlier you start, the better off you are. 
    reply 1 day
    EndlessDream
    EndlessDream posted in Style:
    You need breakfast and lunch. Starving yourself, even if you aren't hungry, makes you loose energy to the point you could pass out from not eating. Keep your diet healthy. For breakfast, at least have yogurt, fruit, and juice. Drink at least 4 full glasses of water a day. Trim down on the snacks. Everyone has different bodies and build. You may just be large-boned. And that's not bad! That makes you stronger and higher ability to gain muscle. Loosing weight doesn't happen over night. It can take months. 
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    Nekogirl101
    Nekogirl101 posted in Style:
    For years my parents would tell me I'm skinny but compared to other people, my waist was bigger and I would always hide it. Though it was obvious I weighed more, I've only been doing this for a week and I didn't ever tell anyone what I was doing until my parents found out. I would skip lunch and breakfast and say I was full. I only ate a big dinner every night. Once my parents found out, they said it was unhealthy and if I didn't  stop, I would develop an eating disorder. I obviously listened to them, but I've tried as best as I can so far. I have barely lost any weight from exercise and my parents won't let me go on a diet because I already 'eat healthy enough'. I want to lose weight without exercising being 3/4s of my lifestyle. I know, I'm a lazy idiot for saying all this.
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