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Dear Dish-It: My BFF Is Gay

It's OK If Your Friend Is Gay

Dear Dish-It,

My BFF told me she wanted to get together with another girl. I thought she was joking, so I said, “I’m into guys, so...” And she answered, “Well, I’m not.” She asked me if that was a problem. I lied and said no. The truth is, I don't really have a problem with it except I'm a girl and it’s a little awkward. Also, my dad is very Christian and I’m scared if I tell him my BFF is gay he won’t let me hang out with her anymore. What should I do?

true2myself


Dear true2myself,


I hope you don’t really have a problem with your BFF liking girls or, perhaps, being gay. The fact that you are a girl shouldn’t matter (it certainly doesn’t mean that she is crushing on you – most likely, she still considers you just a friend and always will). Neither should it matter what your parents’ beliefs are. You are your own person and you need to decide what is right and wrong on your own. The only thing that matters in this situation is that you continue to be a good, caring and understanding friend, and that you continue to support your BFF in anything she chooses to feel or do (as long as it doesn’t hurt anyone else, that is), just as she would support you. As for your father, well, I don’t really understand why your friend’s sexuality is something you would need to discuss with him. If he asks about it, you may have to tell him the truth, but if he doesn’t ask, it doesn’t seem like it’s any of his business. The only person who should reveal information about her sexuality to anyone else is your BFF. It’s simply not your place to tell other people on her behalf, without her permission. I hope that helps.


So, ya gotta burnin' question? Need some love directions? Thinkin' 'bout stuff like depression, sex,how ya feel 'bout YOURSELF (that's called "self-esteem"), boyfriends, girlfriends, losin' old friends, bullyin' or peer pressure, but too scared to ask the parents? Don't be scared to Dish-It here. Send all of your questions to deardish@kidzworld.com But 'member, if ya hang out in Chat with other Kidzworld members who know ya by your 'username', ya might wanna use a secret nickname when ya write in. That way no one'll ever know it's you. And, just in case ya don't know, Dish-It gets a lotta letters everyday, and she can't answer 'em all. So keep checkin' the column cuz she's prob'ly answerin' somethin' very similar to your question while you're out doin' somethin' else. K? And Thanks! Ya keep her outta trouble. Oh! And if ya've got words of wisdom you wanna share,We'll dish 'em up, too.


More Dish-It Advice:

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    Comments

    QueenOfScare

    QueenOfScare wrote:

    that doesn't mean that we can't be ourselves. you can believe what you want, she can be...
    commented: Tue Jan 21, 2014

    QueenOfScare

    QueenOfScare wrote:

    your dad's wrong. people should be who they are. accept that she is who she is, support...
    commented: Tue Jan 21, 2014

    msprettymama

    msprettymama wrote:

    I luv gay ppl n the proper term 4 a girl is lesbian thts really offensive
    commented: Tue Jan 21, 2014

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    american_brit
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    Hi Jaera!      sisihastwobunnies is right. It's perfectly fine for you to have a crush, but you're a little young for a "love life." Don't worry though! Someday, if it's meant to be (Ha ^-^) you'll find the one who's just right for you. Until then, it's great to have good guy friends -and in years to come if one of those friendships develop into something more, then props to you (:  Future advice: You have to understand that feelings aren't always mutual. You may like someone and they'll see you only as a friend -or vice versa.  THIS IS OKAY.  It may hurt, but that's just proof that you'll have to move on. Something better is ahead,  you simply haven't gotten there yet (: Having patience can be hard, but it's worth it. Good luck! -And I hoped this helped!                                    Wishing you the best,                                             american_brit ^-^
    reply 19 minutes
    hugebear
    hugebear posted in Family Issues:
    I want to own a pony  You want to own a pony it was dirty and smelly  All animals has their own unique smell and its how animals smell. You was feeling ill so it could of smelt even worse I felt low in the class You was ill and its understandable that you was feeling awful I feel really nervous about going tomorrow for a proper riding day. Me suggestion is to ask the stables for the horse you would feel more comfortables riding I think it's 8 hours 15 minutes!  I knows you think there wont be breaks but there will be and probably about every hour or so.  Dont worry about this. Yay you got all jodphurs and boots and your all set. Me suggestion is go along tomorrow and relax and enjoy it.  Sure it does costs money to go there but your parents wouldnt be organising it if they hadnt got the money to pay.  If you doesnt like it after you tried it then say you dont wanna go again. It does sounds epical though and good luck for tomorrow  :angel
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    ElfyKathy
    I went to own a pony day but I got the start of a short illness and I was scared and it was dirty and smelly and I felt low in the class but I was oldest on the biggest horse and now I feel really nervous about going tomorrow for a proper riding day. I think it's 8 hours 15 minutes! That's like, school with no break or lunch and four extra lessons! I acted excited cause I got rosettes and lollies and mum took me out for jodpurs and boots but now I feel a bit sick and tight and wobbly even though it was fun on wednesday and I have 3 sort of friends there already and the horse I rode, Bob, was great! Mum's in Wales and having a nice time so I don't want to dull her and I talked to Dad but he said 'don't worry I don't know what mum will think sorry'. I don't want to say no or quit later on cause: I'll feel bad to Bob The stables is just up the road so when I see the owner (who's real nice to me) or the instructor (who's at my school) I'll feel bad for saying no I don't want to join you I feel like mum will be disappointed cause she used to adore riding and had 2 horses and a pony I always begged to ride since I was 3 and so it's been over a decade! It costs cash. Cash, cash, cash. From mum and dad's pockets. Cash.  
    reply about 2 hours
    american_brit
    american_brit posted in Friends:
    "noordinarygirl" wrote: Have you ever heard the saying, "Life is not about finding yourself, but creating yourself"? You already have traits, quirks, gifts, and talents put in you by God, and you just need to "put yourself out there" to discover what they are and what you can do with them. Don't worry so much about knowing who you are right now, you'll find that out in time. Just try to become the best you can be with what you have." Exactly ^-^ I don't think I could explain it any better. "_ALizB_" wrote:So pretty much what y'all are saying is, give it time?  Basically. Take time to learn about yourself. *What do you like to do? *What're dreams? *What're you scared of? *What makes you laugh? *What upsets you? *Are you happy? Why or why not? *What would you like to change? Can you? If so, what're you going to do about it? *Etcetera *Etcetera Life's a time to ask questions. You have to understand though, it doesn't always offer clear answers -but they're there; not always easily seen, but always there.  
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    hugebear
    hugebear posted in Friends:
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