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Dear Dish-It: I'm A Loner

Dear Dish-It,

For most of my school life, I have been a loner. In Grade 3 I became friends with someone just so I wouldn't be lonely. But she wasn’t as loyal to me as a true friend should be, leaving me alone at recess almost all the time and then asking if she could come over to my house after school. Now that I’m in Grade 7, I have actually started hanging out with the other girls in my class. They’re really nice to me but I'm starting to wonder if they just feel sorry for me? I’ll never know for sure unless I ask them about it, but if I do, they may be offended. Can you please help?

PartyGirl847


Dear PartyGirl847,


In my opinion, the friends you have made in Grade 7 are really your friends. They don’t pity you or feel sorry for you. They actually, genuinely and sincerely like you and want to hang out with you.


The problem here isn’t anyone else – it’s you. Not that you’re a bad person or anything – you’re not. But I think you have a low opinion of yourself – something called low self-esteem.


I think the best thing to do in this situation is to believe in yourself more. Think about all the good things there are about you – including the fact that you can be and are a great, true, loyal friend. Why would anyone not want to hang out with you and spend time with you? You’re a great person!


The more you believe this and other good things about yourself, the closer you’ll become with your new friends and the more good people and friends you will attract into your life. Start liking yourself more, and I guarantee other people will like you more and more, too.


So, ya gotta burnin' question? Need some love directions? Thinkin' 'bout stuff like depression, sex,how ya feel 'bout YOURSELF (that's called "self-esteem"), boyfriends, girlfriends, losin' old friends, bullyin' or peer pressure, but too scared to ask the parents? Don't be scared to Dish-It here. Send all of your questions to deardish@kidzworld.com But 'member, if ya hang out in Chat with other Kidzworld members who know ya by your 'username', ya might wanna use a secret nickname when ya write in. That way no one'll ever know it's you. And, just in case ya don't know, Dish-It gets a lotta letters everyday, and she can't answer 'em all. So keep checkin' the column cuz she's prob'ly answerin' somethin' very similar to your question while you're out doin' somethin' else. K? And Thanks! Ya keep her outta trouble. Oh! And if ya've got words of wisdom you wanna share,We'll dish 'em up, too.


More Dish-It Advice:

  • I’m A Loner
  • I’m A Loser
  • My Friends Are Mean
  • I Wish I Wasn’t Mean
  • More Great Advice from Dish-It!
  • 34 Comments

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    Dear Dish-It In The Forums

    Kirsteeeeen
    This is going to sound completely cliche, but the best thing is to just be yourself. You'll make friends no problem. People can tell when you're being genuine or not, and they definitely appreciate you for who you are more than if you tried to be someone else. You got this, it'll be a fun and exciting experience. :)
    reply 1 day
    Kirsteeeeen
    I am so sorry for your loss. It must be tough going through this at the moment, losing someone is always a difficult situation. Grief can be unsettling and uncomfortable, but is a normal and necessary part of grieving and getting yourself through these types of things. I encourage you to continue to remember her, whether it be through stories or drawings or other ways you might express your good memories together. You could also do something in her memory such as plant a tree. Healing from loss takes time. There's no magic fix that'll make you feel better overnight. You just have to let yourself go through the process and eventually you will feel better. I promise. I'm also here if you feel like talking about it at any time, just send me a request.
    reply 1 day
    Kirsteeeeen
    Kirsteeeeen posted in Style:
    On a typical day I wear a pair of ripped jeans and either a hoodie or jacket, and a snapback. The opposite would probably be a dress lmao.
    reply 1 day
    Kirsteeeeen
    Kirsteeeeen posted in Style:
    I also love expensive clothing. Brand names are my thing. But I always shop either during sale times or at second hand stores. Sales are my best friend, honestly. It might be frustrating to wait, but it's worth it in the end. Shop only on sale racks in big stores, and scout out smaller second hand stores that often carry brand names, never worn, but for a cheaper price.
    reply 1 day
    StopItGetSomeHelp
    Hello! I'm in need of urgent advice. The guy I have a crush on and I were best friends around two years ago. Somebody told him that I like him, and now he avoids me like the plague... I really just want to be friends with him again even if he doesn't like me back. What should I do? I'm quite an awkward girl, and I can't make conversation for the life of me. We're going into seventh grade, and I haven't talked to him nor seen him all summer. Please help!
    reply 3 days