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Dear Dish-It, I'm Not Ready for Sex

Dear Dish-It,

I really like this boy and he likes me. We were going together for a while - not too long, maybe four weeks. So, one day a friend of his that goes to his school told me he goes with some other girl and that's why he didn't show up last night. He also said the boy was only going with me because he wanted me to have sex with him but I'm not ready for sex. I'm only 13 but I really do like him. Should I do it or just find a guy who likes me for me, not for being fully developed at age 13?
Confused


Dear Confused,

You need to change your name to something more appropriate like CoolGurl or Totally-Together - cuz confused you ain't. You know exactly what you should and shouldn't do here... but let me reconfirm. Should you "do it" with this guy? No. Should you "just find a guy who likes you for you and not for being fully developed at age 13?" YES!


Being the first to develop in your class, or developing early, is tough but don't stress over it. It's just a normal bod-thing... but unfortunately it means a few more stares, smirks and maybe even some undesirable attention. This dude that you like - he's the poster-child for undesirable attention. First-off, he's a total player. Secondly, he's a scammer. You need to realize that the boy you thought was all that, isn't anything at all. Lose him and don't look back. And, girlfriend, good on you for knowing that just because your body is maturing doesn't mean that you're ready for sex.


Dear Dish-It,

I know these boys named James and Sandy. I don't know if they like me or not but they are always flirting and stuff. And neither one of them has asked me out. What's wrong with them?
bowwowqtpywife


Dear Dish-It,

I like this boy name Sandy but he does not seem to notice me when I want him to the most. He's always talking to me but that's not good enough. And I just can't ask him out because I am too scared. Every girl at my school seems to be able to ask Sandy out but me. Most my friends have gone with him but me. And I'm always writing him letters but he never responds and just keeps the letters in his bookbag or something like that. I wanna know how can I be down with my future beau? Please help me.
bowwowqtpywife


Dear Dish-It,

I told my friends I really hate this boy that I like named Sandy. Because I have wrote him so many letters telling him about me but he don't respond. And it is kinda of embarrassing.
bowwowqtpywife


Dear Dish-It,

I like dis boy named Sandy but I go up to him to ask him out but he always has a girlfriend when I do. And he is not lying because everybody knows when he has a girlfriend. Help!!!!!!!
bowwowqtpywife


Dear bowwowqtpywife,

Whoa girlfriend! That was longer and more confusing than any Days of Our Lives plotline! I think I can tell ya why Sandy and James aren't asking you out... but you may not want to hear it...
I think Sandy just isn't into ya girlfriend. Sorry. You say you write him all the time but he never responds, he's dated all your friends and when you ask him out he's always going out with someone else... Am I the only one that sees the big ol' signs here? You have a crush on someone who doesn't have a crush on you - trust me, it's not a big deal. It happens to all of us at some point or another in life. Don't let it get you down - but don't let it make you into a freak either. Tellin' peeps you carry big hate for him is not going to win you brownie points with anyone. Just take a deep breath, enjoy the friendship he's obviously willing to give and move on... gracefully.


Now as for James, maybe he just isn't ready for the dating scene. Remember, people develop emotionally (and physically) at their own pace. Flirtin' is one thing he may be good at and he may be comfortable with - but going out with someone could still be as scary as a Scream movie for him. Just relax and be his friend and see if things start to change gradually. And, girl, no dis' meant but you may not be ready for the datin' scene either. You sent me a ton of emails in a short time all with crazy emotions over two diff guys. You should relax a little and just let things happen naturally.


So, ya gotta burnin' question? Need some love directions? Thinkin' 'bout stuff like depression, sex,how ya feel 'bout YOURSELF (that's called "self-esteem"), boyfriends, girlfriends, losin' old friends, bullyin' or peer pressure, but too scared to ask the parents? Don't be scared to .


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#1 Sign He's Not Into You?

  • If he acts kinda cold when you chat him up, he ain't interested.
  • If he doesn't return your calls it's a HUGE hint.
  • He may think he's not into me, but given enough time, I can change his mind.
  • If he runs away screaming, I pretty much give up.

Dear Dish-It In The Forums

drowning
"SatanslilDemon" wrote: Ok so I have a dilemma. I really, and I mean really like this guy. He's considerate of my mental wellbeing and health, plus he's really funny and sweet. He's respectful, loyal, and his hugs are the best ever(he's like a foot and 4 inches taller than me). the dilemma is, he'stwentyandI'mfifteenturningsixteensoon.... I'm not gonna even ask about dating him until i'm sixteen but I've called him in total anxiety attack crying my eyes out and he calmed me down and made me laugh, and I invited him to come see a choir performance so he spent the day with me... My mom ships us... but I'm a little worried because of the age difference  and experience difference and just, I don't want to miss the chance of being with him because of it. ​  any advice??? It's really nice that your mother supports it, that always helps!! I'm glad that your family enjoys his company as well. Being 16 while he's 20 is alright. It's a slight odd age gap. But, I think as long as you both are ready, it's alright. Make sure you're mature and safe with your choices though. Personally, I think you should wait until you're closer to at least, 17. But, as long as you two are smart about what you're doing, it should be alright when it come around to it.
reply 2 days
fitta
"Shygirl15" wrote:I really like this boy in my second period class but i dont know how to tell him because he knows that im transgender do whatever makes you feel comfortable or just wing it and tell him and if he tells you something because you're trans forget about him! He doesn't deserve you. But it's totally okay if you want to play it safe and not go up to him. You do you. :3 
reply 2 days
fitta
"SatanslilDemon" wrote: Ok so I have a dilemma. I really, and I mean really like this guy. He's considerate of my mental wellbeing and health, plus he's really funny and sweet. He's respectful, loyal, and his hugs are the best ever(he's like a foot and 4 inches taller than me). the dilemma is, he'stwentyandI'mfifteenturningsixteensoon.... I'm not gonna even ask about dating him until i'm sixteen but I've called him in total anxiety attack crying my eyes out and he calmed me down and made me laugh, and I invited him to come see a choir performance so he spent the day with me... My mom ships us... but I'm a little worried because of the age difference  and experience difference and just, I don't want to miss the chance of being with him because of it. ​  any advice??? i suggest you wait i mean you are going to be 16 that's way too young to be dating someone who is 4/5 years older than you,no? You can still talk to him when it comes to your anxiety attacks and all of that because I have those too every night so I know how it feels, but maybe you should wait. But at the end of the day it's your decision I'm just here to give advice 
reply 2 days
SatanslilDemon
Ok so I have a dilemma. I really, and I mean really like this guy. He's considerate of my mental wellbeing and health, plus he's really funny and sweet. He's respectful, loyal, and his hugs are the best ever(he's like a foot and 4 inches taller than me). the dilemma is, he'stwentyandI'mfifteenturningsixteensoon.... I'm not gonna even ask about dating him until i'm sixteen but I've called him in total anxiety attack crying my eyes out and he calmed me down and made me laugh, and I invited him to come see a choir performance so he spent the day with me... My mom ships us... but I'm a little worried because of the age difference  and experience difference and just, I don't want to miss the chance of being with him because of it. ​  any advice???
reply 2 days
SmartSunnyShadow
I feel like that too. My best friend will always hang out with her 'new friends' that I have a really bad opinion about. My friend will treat me rudely all the time and sometimes make fun of me with her friends. But, when I needed her the most in my life, she was there for me, and I told her how I felt. She says that she just wants to hang out with more people and apologized, people can be a little teasy at times.  Also, after seeing each other for a long time, people make new friends and start hanging out with them more, it doesn't mean that she doesn't like you.  This may be different for you, but just tell her about it, she will have to know you feelings at one point.  Hope I helped you. 
reply 2 days