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Dish-It: 17 & Never Been Kissed

Dear Dish-It,

So I need advice. I'm almost 17 and never been kissed. I have plenty of guy friends and I'm always myself around them. When I like a guy, I flirt with him. I dress well, I’m not unfortunate-looking, I don't feel like I come off too strong at all. It just seems like every time I like a guy, he NEVER EVER likes me back. Rejection after rejection. I just can't take it anymore. I want someone to treat me right. I'm a chill girl, I play guitar, write music, guys dig girls like that, right? I just feel like I'm always my guy friends’ "music buddy" *sigh* I just want to know what’s wrong with me. All this rejection I guess is just hard to swallow sometimes …

Koko


Dear Koko,


I think deep down you know there’s nothing wrong with you at all. You just feel tired and anxious because something you want very badly doesn’t seem to be happening at the speed with which you want it to occur. Have you ever heard the saying, patience is a virtue? That means good things always come to those who have the patience to wait for them. I know this is the kind of advice you probably feel isn’t very useful but in any case, wait is just what you’re going to have to do.


In fact, I personally was about 16-and-a-half-or-so, not much younger than 17, when I got my very first kiss. I don’t recall being as anxious about it as you seem to be, but things may have been different back when I was in high school, or maybe I went to a school or was surrounded by friends that didn’t really place very much importance or focus on girl/boy relationships, dating or kissing. However, I do remember wondering if any guy I liked would ever like me back, and if I ever would get a first kiss, a first date, a first relationship …


The truth is, EVERYONE gets a first first kiss – if that statement can somehow reassure you, so you can stop focusing so much on getting that kiss and start focusing on doing stuff you love, hanging out with your friends and pursuing the guys you have crushes on in a normal, healthy way, I think you’ll find yourself in a much better place.


Trust me. A guy WILL like you back. You WILL eventually go on a date and have your first boyfriend. You will most likely go on to get married and have a family of your own, too. Most everyone does – everyone who wants those things, that is. And it doesn’t matter who you are or what kind of stuff you’re into or what you look like – there’s someone for everyone and if you just focus on being the best YOU that you can possibly be, some lucky guy is sure to notice and give you a great first kiss!


So STOP WORRYING! It’ll happen. There’s no sense in trying to rush life along – let each experience come to you in its own good time and you’ll see, your life, and all the experiences you’d like to have in it, will turn it exactly the way it was meant to!


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The Right Time for Your First Kiss?

  • When you are in love with someone.
  • When you're 15.
  • Not until you've finished high school.
  • When you're playing truth or dare.

Dear Dish-It In The Forums

drowning
drowning posted in Friends:
@country_girl19, I agree with Athena. She might not realize how she's making you feel and it's best to talk to her about it, if not it could get worse. If nothing changes after talking with her, then I think you should rethink things. @WatermelonCurlz, I don't really think you should hang around them that much. They don't listen to you or seem to really care about the fact that you've talked about getting different friends. I'm not saying to just cut them off all together, but I wouldn't stray from the idea of slowly distancing yourself.
reply about 4 hours
JazzyRox
JazzyRox posted in Friends:
"WatermelonCurlz" wrote:OMG! OK so, I have a group to 3 friends (not including me) and they love this video game that I'm not allowed to play. And they know that, so they talk about it purposely around me. Omg, ikr.When I ask to talk about something else the ignore me. So I say, I'm going to go find real friends, and they say, OK, like me care. And that's all they want to talk about, at recess, lunch, secretly in class, you name it thye do it. How do I get them to stop?   You should probably just stop talking to them and stuff. don't sit by them at lunch and don't hang out with them at recess. they sound like they are not good friends. if it gets worse, just tell your parents if they don't already know. idk how good i am at advise. hope this helped.  ~JazzyRox
reply about 4 hours
WatermelonCurlz
OMG!OK so, I have a group to 3 friends (not including me) and they love this video game that I'm not allowed to play. And they know that, so they talk about it purposely around me. Omg, ikr.When I ask to talk about something else the ignore me. So I say, I'm going to go find real friends, and they say, OK, like me care. And that's all they want to talk about, at recess, lunch, secretly in class, you name it thye do it. How do I get them to stop?
reply about 5 hours
Abbergrl
Well I strongly agree with you all. It's like, wow I never knew so many people had this problem!
reply 1 day
Abbergrl
Abbergrl posted in Friends:
A perfect friend is one who respects your feelings and doesn't make fun of them but helps you feel better, who can drive you only slightly insane, and who will try to save you from embarrassing situations by making you see the funny side. :) :D
reply 1 day