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Dear Dish-It: My Boyfriend Wants To Kiss

Dear Dish-It,

My boyfriend asked me when we were going to kiss. We are only in the 5th grade. What should I tell him?

Confused


First KissFirst Kiss

Dear Confused,

If you're not ready to take your relationship to a more physical level, don't. The right guy will understand if all you can handle right now is flirty smiles and holding hands.

Also, an important thing is not to be confused by what you read in books or see in movies. Dating or having a boyfriend doesn't mean that you HAVE to kiss. Rather, dating is a chance to get to know the guy you're going out with. Once you know each other better, you may decide you don't want to have a romantic or physical relationship with him after all. And most important of all is to remember that when it comes to physical things like kissing, you're in charge. You don't have to do anything that doesn't feel right for you.

Here are some more good tips for those who have Never Been Kissed and don't feel quite ready for it, yet:

  • Whether it's French kissing, making out or going to first base, don't let yourself be rushed into anything. Do only what you're sure you really want to do. After all, you're only in Grade 5. You've got plenty of time ahead of you - wait until you're sure.
  • Ask yourself how you feel about your boyfriend. Is he someone you trust? Will he start rumors or gossip about you? Are you considering kissing him because you really care about him or because you're curious to try it?
  • Are you just trying to prove you're grown up or to become more popular?
  • Don't let yourself fall for lines like, "If you really liked me, you'd make out with me," or "Everyone else is doing it." If your boyfriend is handing you one of these lines, turn it around and tell him, "If you really cared about ME, you wouldn't pressure me into doing anything I don't want to do."

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277 Comments

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The Right Time for Your First Kiss?

  • When you are in love with someone.
  • When you're 15.
  • Not until you've finished high school.
  • When you're playing truth or dare.

Dear Dish-It In The Forums

drowning
"SatanslilDemon" wrote: Ok so I have a dilemma. I really, and I mean really like this guy. He's considerate of my mental wellbeing and health, plus he's really funny and sweet. He's respectful, loyal, and his hugs are the best ever(he's like a foot and 4 inches taller than me). the dilemma is, he'stwentyandI'mfifteenturningsixteensoon.... I'm not gonna even ask about dating him until i'm sixteen but I've called him in total anxiety attack crying my eyes out and he calmed me down and made me laugh, and I invited him to come see a choir performance so he spent the day with me... My mom ships us... but I'm a little worried because of the age difference  and experience difference and just, I don't want to miss the chance of being with him because of it. ​  any advice??? It's really nice that your mother supports it, that always helps!! I'm glad that your family enjoys his company as well. Being 16 while he's 20 is alright. It's a slight odd age gap. But, I think as long as you both are ready, it's alright. Make sure you're mature and safe with your choices though. Personally, I think you should wait until you're closer to at least, 17. But, as long as you two are smart about what you're doing, it should be alright when it come around to it.
reply about 23 hours
fitta
"Shygirl15" wrote:I really like this boy in my second period class but i dont know how to tell him because he knows that im transgender do whatever makes you feel comfortable or just wing it and tell him and if he tells you something because you're trans forget about him! He doesn't deserve you. But it's totally okay if you want to play it safe and not go up to him. You do you. :3 
reply 1 day
fitta
"SatanslilDemon" wrote: Ok so I have a dilemma. I really, and I mean really like this guy. He's considerate of my mental wellbeing and health, plus he's really funny and sweet. He's respectful, loyal, and his hugs are the best ever(he's like a foot and 4 inches taller than me). the dilemma is, he'stwentyandI'mfifteenturningsixteensoon.... I'm not gonna even ask about dating him until i'm sixteen but I've called him in total anxiety attack crying my eyes out and he calmed me down and made me laugh, and I invited him to come see a choir performance so he spent the day with me... My mom ships us... but I'm a little worried because of the age difference  and experience difference and just, I don't want to miss the chance of being with him because of it. ​  any advice??? i suggest you wait i mean you are going to be 16 that's way too young to be dating someone who is 4/5 years older than you,no? You can still talk to him when it comes to your anxiety attacks and all of that because I have those too every night so I know how it feels, but maybe you should wait. But at the end of the day it's your decision I'm just here to give advice 
reply 1 day
SatanslilDemon
Ok so I have a dilemma. I really, and I mean really like this guy. He's considerate of my mental wellbeing and health, plus he's really funny and sweet. He's respectful, loyal, and his hugs are the best ever(he's like a foot and 4 inches taller than me). the dilemma is, he'stwentyandI'mfifteenturningsixteensoon.... I'm not gonna even ask about dating him until i'm sixteen but I've called him in total anxiety attack crying my eyes out and he calmed me down and made me laugh, and I invited him to come see a choir performance so he spent the day with me... My mom ships us... but I'm a little worried because of the age difference  and experience difference and just, I don't want to miss the chance of being with him because of it. ​  any advice???
reply 1 day
SmartSunnyShadow
I feel like that too. My best friend will always hang out with her 'new friends' that I have a really bad opinion about. My friend will treat me rudely all the time and sometimes make fun of me with her friends. But, when I needed her the most in my life, she was there for me, and I told her how I felt. She says that she just wants to hang out with more people and apologized, people can be a little teasy at times.  Also, after seeing each other for a long time, people make new friends and start hanging out with them more, it doesn't mean that she doesn't like you.  This may be different for you, but just tell her about it, she will have to know you feelings at one point.  Hope I helped you. 
reply 1 day