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Dear Dish-it: My BFF's Dating My Ex

Dear Dish-it,


My second best friend in the whole entire world is still dating my ex. Me and him were really really really close and he seems to have moved on from me. But I still have very strong feelings for him. I have told my friend the way I feel about him but it’s not making a difference. But I still wanna be friends with her. I am an emotional wreck.


bubblegumkisses


Dear bubblegumkisses,


Wow – this is one of the toughest situations to be in when it comes to friendship/love. You want to be happy for your best friend, but you also feel hurt and confused about why she is dating your ex.


I think that the best thing to do is to talk to your friend. Get her one-on-one and tell her what’s been going on, being totally honest about how you feel. I know you said you’ve tried this before, but honestly, there’s no other way to get your feelings across, so you’re just going to have to try again. Just be honest and let her know it’s hurting your feelings. Try to make her understand that you’re being sincere – not jealous.


If it’s looking like she won’t even consider the possibility of taking a break with the guy or making a compromise with you until it’s worked out then consider maybe taking a mini break from her. It doesn’t mean she has to dump him right away because you say so, but she should at least be willing to tone it down or come up with some other idea to help you. It’s never cool when a girl picks a guy over a friend. If something changes though, and you decide you’re happy with them together, then still talk your concerns out to keep the communication open, but let her know she has your support.


Sound Off

Got any advice for bubblegumkisses? Have your say by leaving a comment below this story!


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Dear Dish-It In The Forums

jordand08
Sounds like you have a crush. 
reply about 2 hours
Kaori_46
Talk it through. Ask them out maybe? don't worry about it. It'll work out. If they like you as much as you them, you have nothing to worry about. :)
reply about 3 hours
PerksBeingABookworm
How do I stop thinking about this guy in my school? Like seriously it's pissing me off. Every time we're in the same room, I have this uncanny awareness of where he is and what he is doing. He makes me want to watch the door of the two classes we have together whenever he enters or leaves the room, he makes me look forward to Art and Spanish and disappointed when he isn't there despite the fact I don't even talk to him much. He makes butterflies surge in my stomach and my heart pound in my ears, he makes me so nervous when I'm around him and I have to keep myself from making shaky movements. He makes me want to stare, but I don't want people to know that I care. (And great, he just made me rhyme as well).And a series of coincidences have resulted in me having to interact with him in Art. Ex). We had to draw a # out of a hat and review someone else's artwork...guess whose I got? And my teacher randomly gave us new tables-so now he sits right across from me. ...this is driving me insane. What do I do? (And I'm praying to God right now that he doesn't go on Kidzworld-if he does I hope he doesn't put two and two-oh look fantastic I rhymed again. I'm not even trying make this STOP I'm not even writing rationally anymore)
reply about 3 hours
PerksBeingABookworm
"Dpsdps55" wrote:someone likes me and I like them but we dont know what 2 do... plz help!!! P.S if you help thanks soooo much I'm not exactly an expert on this but...why not talk it out with them? Get to know them better and figure out what you both want? I mean, you both apparently feel the same way, that's half the battle.  I can only assume you both are unsure what to do because you guys are hesitant about making a move and actually forming a relationship. I mean, I get it: relationships are scary; though I've never actually been in one, I know the thought of it can be. You're voluntarily making yourself vulnerable to another human being, you're letting someone in to your life in a way that you've never done before, a way that can leave you hurting or actually make your life better.  Humans fear the unknown and crave familiarity, and a new relationship is definitely new territory.  But just because there's the possibility of getting hurt doesn't mean you shouldn't try. Take that plunge into the unknown, let yourself fall, say Geronimo and dive into that waterfall (see what I did there?)-because you'll never know what could be unless you take a chance. 
reply about 3 hours
Dpsdps55
someone likes me and I like them but we dont know what 2 do... plz help!!! P.S if you help thanks soooo much
reply about 4 hours