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Dear Dish-it: My Mom Reads My Emails

Dear Dish-it,

OMG! I can’t stand it anymore! My mom reads my e-mails! It’s embarrassing cause my friends write to me about boys A LOT! I’ve told my friends to stop sending those kinds of e-mails but they won’t. They always send me messages asking me, “So who do you like?!” So I’m all freaked my mom will read those and wanna have a big talk with me. Help!


Dear lolfunni,

The first thing to do is to make sure your mom is really reading your e-mails. You wouldn’t want to accuse her of something she’s not actually doing – like being a snoop. If you’re sure, then the best thing is to talk to her about it. Without getting angry, try to explain to your mom why your privacy is important to you. Try something along the lines of, “Hey, mom, the e-mails my friends send me are sorta private, and it would make me pretty uncomfortable if you were reading them. I’d definitely like to share things that are going on in my life with you, but instead of reading my e-mails without my permission, do you think you could ask me first?”

Maybe if you’re more open with your mom, and talk to her about more of the stuff that’s happening in your life, she won’t feel she needs to look at your private messages in order to find out. That means filling her in on your feelings for boys, the changes your body is going through as you grow up, your relationships with your friends, etc. If you don’t hide stuff from your mom, she may feel more comfortable because she’ll know what’s going on with you. In other words, she won’t feel she has to be sneaky about finding out what’s happening in your life.

The other thing you can do is always remember to log out of your e-mail account. Meaning, after you’re done checking your e-mail, sign out so that whoever wants to use the computer next would have to know your username and password in order to sign back in and see all your messages. However, your mom may want to make sure you’re staying safe on the Internet by knowing your username and password. If that’s the case, then you’ll just have to talk to her and tell her how you feel.

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