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Dear Dish-it: Help Me Get Over My Shyness

Dear Dish-it,


I am a really shy girl. Whenever I have to present a presentation to the class, I always a bad job at it. AND, I don't really have the courage to talk to make friends. Can you help me get out of my shyness?


shy-as-a-deer


Dear shy-as-a-deer,


Believe me - I know what it’s like to be a wallflower. People can seem very intimidating especially the first time you talk to them. What worked for me? Giving myself challenges to be more outgoing, doing the things I wasn’t so comfortable with and getting involved.


Get Your Goal On

Make being more outgoing a personal goal. When I was breaking out of my shell, I found it extremely rewarding to make up little challenges for myself. One of my faves was to talk to five different (and new) people and ask how their day was going during each school day. I found when I pushed myself out of my comfort zone doing activities like that, not only did I get closer to my goal, but I made more friends, too.


Front & Center

I also made a point to do more public speaking activities. These activities made me much more confident talking to a crowd and raising my voice. One of the most rewarding things I did was emceeing at my middle school talent show. At the end of the evening, when everyone applauded for me, I realized that I had done it. I wasn’t just the girl in the corner, and you don’t have to be either. Look for activities in your school and community that emphasize speaking and sign up for them. Confidence is most important thing to project.


Team Effort

The best thing any shy person can do is join a team. Go for a drama production or a sport. Both activities set you up with a core group of kids with - you guessed it - the same interests. Make it a personal goal to get to know each person in the ensemble by talking to them one-on-one. Good-bye timidity, hello new friends!


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  • A little - I can get kinda goofy in front of crushes.
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  • I wish I was a turtle and I had a shell I could hide in - all the time!

Dear Dish-It In The Forums

CoolerThanMyself
I'm a 12 year old girl with really strict parents! I do chores( even handling BLEACH sometimes) , I take care of my little brother, I'm in top set for all my classes- even on the gifted and talented register and I've only ever had 1 detention- and that was their fault anyway bc I was late( they drive). But, I'm still NEVER allowed out with my friends! My friends are all in top sets as well, are well behaved and all we literally would do is window shopping. I mean, there are my age smoking shisha and doing #####- they should be lucky I'm not a delinquent! But my parents always say I can't hang out. Not because they're worried about my safety, they just dont want me to go out.! Even sleepovers, my parents always say no because they ' haven't met the parents" but they make NO effort to do so. I'm losing out on knowing my friends better and whilst they're all making best friends, at school I'm just the person in the background- the left out friend. It hurts and most of the time I wish I was fostered or something. How can I make them loosen up? ( don't say anything about sneaking out because I chose life)
reply about 7 hours
Corps
Corps posted in Style:
Thank You Mate :)
reply about 13 hours
Kirsteeeeen
Kirsteeeeen posted in Friends:
Is there a particular reason or situation causing you to feel this way? I can't provide much advice other than talk to them about it. Communication is important.
reply 1 day
Arenl
Arenl posted in Friends:
He is a jerk, but then what ?? He is your best friend . Maybe you should tell him to sleep for an extra hour. It may be a lack of sleep.
reply 1 day
KittyCheshire
KittyCheshire posted in Friends:
My BFFEL (best friend for eternal life) is being a jerk after we have been friends for a long time. What should I do?
reply 1 day