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Dear Dish-it: Help Me Get Over My Shyness

Dear Dish-it,


I am a really shy girl. Whenever I have to present a presentation to the class, I always a bad job at it. AND, I don't really have the courage to talk to make friends. Can you help me get out of my shyness?


shy-as-a-deer


Dear shy-as-a-deer,


Believe me - I know what it’s like to be a wallflower. People can seem very intimidating especially the first time you talk to them. What worked for me? Giving myself challenges to be more outgoing, doing the things I wasn’t so comfortable with and getting involved.


Get Your Goal On

Make being more outgoing a personal goal. When I was breaking out of my shell, I found it extremely rewarding to make up little challenges for myself. One of my faves was to talk to five different (and new) people and ask how their day was going during each school day. I found when I pushed myself out of my comfort zone doing activities like that, not only did I get closer to my goal, but I made more friends, too.


Front & Center

I also made a point to do more public speaking activities. These activities made me much more confident talking to a crowd and raising my voice. One of the most rewarding things I did was emceeing at my middle school talent show. At the end of the evening, when everyone applauded for me, I realized that I had done it. I wasn’t just the girl in the corner, and you don’t have to be either. Look for activities in your school and community that emphasize speaking and sign up for them. Confidence is most important thing to project.


Team Effort

The best thing any shy person can do is join a team. Go for a drama production or a sport. Both activities set you up with a core group of kids with - you guessed it - the same interests. Make it a personal goal to get to know each person in the ensemble by talking to them one-on-one. Good-bye timidity, hello new friends!


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Are You Shy? Vote!

  • A little - I can get kinda goofy in front of crushes.
  • Nope! I love being the center of attention!
  • I wish I was a turtle and I had a shell I could hide in - all the time!

Dear Dish-It In The Forums

drowning
"SatanslilDemon" wrote: Ok so I have a dilemma. I really, and I mean really like this guy. He's considerate of my mental wellbeing and health, plus he's really funny and sweet. He's respectful, loyal, and his hugs are the best ever(he's like a foot and 4 inches taller than me). the dilemma is, he'stwentyandI'mfifteenturningsixteensoon.... I'm not gonna even ask about dating him until i'm sixteen but I've called him in total anxiety attack crying my eyes out and he calmed me down and made me laugh, and I invited him to come see a choir performance so he spent the day with me... My mom ships us... but I'm a little worried because of the age difference  and experience difference and just, I don't want to miss the chance of being with him because of it. ​  any advice??? It's really nice that your mother supports it, that always helps!! I'm glad that your family enjoys his company as well. Being 16 while he's 20 is alright. It's a slight odd age gap. But, I think as long as you both are ready, it's alright. Make sure you're mature and safe with your choices though. Personally, I think you should wait until you're closer to at least, 17. But, as long as you two are smart about what you're doing, it should be alright when it come around to it.
reply 1 day
fitta
"Shygirl15" wrote:I really like this boy in my second period class but i dont know how to tell him because he knows that im transgender do whatever makes you feel comfortable or just wing it and tell him and if he tells you something because you're trans forget about him! He doesn't deserve you. But it's totally okay if you want to play it safe and not go up to him. You do you. :3 
reply 1 day
fitta
"SatanslilDemon" wrote: Ok so I have a dilemma. I really, and I mean really like this guy. He's considerate of my mental wellbeing and health, plus he's really funny and sweet. He's respectful, loyal, and his hugs are the best ever(he's like a foot and 4 inches taller than me). the dilemma is, he'stwentyandI'mfifteenturningsixteensoon.... I'm not gonna even ask about dating him until i'm sixteen but I've called him in total anxiety attack crying my eyes out and he calmed me down and made me laugh, and I invited him to come see a choir performance so he spent the day with me... My mom ships us... but I'm a little worried because of the age difference  and experience difference and just, I don't want to miss the chance of being with him because of it. ​  any advice??? i suggest you wait i mean you are going to be 16 that's way too young to be dating someone who is 4/5 years older than you,no? You can still talk to him when it comes to your anxiety attacks and all of that because I have those too every night so I know how it feels, but maybe you should wait. But at the end of the day it's your decision I'm just here to give advice 
reply 1 day
SatanslilDemon
Ok so I have a dilemma. I really, and I mean really like this guy. He's considerate of my mental wellbeing and health, plus he's really funny and sweet. He's respectful, loyal, and his hugs are the best ever(he's like a foot and 4 inches taller than me). the dilemma is, he'stwentyandI'mfifteenturningsixteensoon.... I'm not gonna even ask about dating him until i'm sixteen but I've called him in total anxiety attack crying my eyes out and he calmed me down and made me laugh, and I invited him to come see a choir performance so he spent the day with me... My mom ships us... but I'm a little worried because of the age difference  and experience difference and just, I don't want to miss the chance of being with him because of it. ​  any advice???
reply 1 day
SmartSunnyShadow
I feel like that too. My best friend will always hang out with her 'new friends' that I have a really bad opinion about. My friend will treat me rudely all the time and sometimes make fun of me with her friends. But, when I needed her the most in my life, she was there for me, and I told her how I felt. She says that she just wants to hang out with more people and apologized, people can be a little teasy at times.  Also, after seeing each other for a long time, people make new friends and start hanging out with them more, it doesn't mean that she doesn't like you.  This may be different for you, but just tell her about it, she will have to know you feelings at one point.  Hope I helped you. 
reply 2 days