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Dear Dish-It: My Friends Are Being Abused

Dear Dish-it,


My friend and her sisters are being abused by their drunk dad. My best friend told me this and I know she wouldn't lie about this. She told me not to tell but I am scared it will get worse. What should I do?


Confused Lee


Dear Confused Lee,


Since you heard this information second-hand (meaning, you didn't hear it straight from the person or people who are supposedly being abused but, rather, from a friend of theirs (your BFF)), I think the first thing you need to do is double-check with your BFF and ask her why she thinks these girls are being abused by their dad. Abuse is a pretty serious allegation to make, and you do need to be sure that you have some reason to believe that it's really happening in your friends' home. I'm not saying your BFF would lie to you (or anyone) about this, but I hope you see the importance of trying to find out the truth before you take it to the next level.


The best way to find out the truth is to talk to the girls who are supposedly being abused themselves. If you don't feel comfortable asking, get your BFF to speak to them, or ask them together. (Also, if you feel uncomfortable about asking them about it, think of the alternative, which is NOT asking and letting the abuse - i9f it's really happening - continue.) Once you get some PROOF or EVIDENCE (which makes you believe for sure, for sure that something bad is going on in that home), then it's time to tell someone - an adult you can trust to do take the necessary actions to stop the abuse.


If you feel like it isn't your place or your right to tell anyone what's happening, get your BFF - who seems to be the person the girls went to when they needed to talk to someone about being abused - to do it or, again, do it together. Or, you can tell your friends that, if they're being abused, they need to tell an adult THEY can trust, like their mom, a school counselor, a help crisis line or a police officer. Explain to them that if they don't tell, then you're going to have to go to an adult yourself, because you should never know about someone being abused and not do anything about it.


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Poll

Do You Know Someone Who's Being Neglected?

  • My parents are constantly neglecting me.
  • My friend's parents are very neglectful.
  • Sometimes I feel neglected, but I know I've got it pretty good.
  • No, I don't know anyone who's being neglected.

Dear Dish-It In The Forums

yugimutoz
just message him about the situation over text or social media! tell him you still want to be friends & you don't want to let things be so awkward anymore between you two. ^__^
reply about 9 hours
SimplyAda
Gurlll, i also can't start conversations either. Well since it's summer? Do you know his social media... like Twitter or Instagram? You can try messaging him about how you feel. I know it seems crazy but just try. Or just confront him in person when you see him in seventh grade. Confidence is key. If he still continues to ignore you  and avoid you, then he's not worth your time gurll. Just ignore him. And focus on your goals and get big and make sure that he regrets avoiding you.  lol you don't have to do all of that, but good luck   :)
reply about 9 hours
SimplyAda
SimplyAda posted in Friends:
Yes. They were fake anyways and disrespectful. Had to cut them off.
reply about 9 hours
NightSpoon
Try asking him about his hobbies, whats up, etc. normal stuff. You guys might find some interesting stuff about each other or even more.
reply 1 day
MeowAllDay
So ever since last Monday my crush has been ignoring me, and I didn't want to push him into talking. We smile and wave but that's about it. I don't know how to get a conversation started. I do compliment, and that never works, but I also asked him what his school profile picture was. He answered and the conversation stopped there. Oh, and I don't think I mentioned that my bff doesn't really like him at all.
reply 1 day