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Dear Dish-It: My Friends Are Being Abused

Dear Dish-it,


My friend and her sisters are being abused by their drunk dad. My best friend told me this and I know she wouldn't lie about this. She told me not to tell but I am scared it will get worse. What should I do?


Confused Lee


Dear Confused Lee,


Since you heard this information second-hand (meaning, you didn't hear it straight from the person or people who are supposedly being abused but, rather, from a friend of theirs (your BFF)), I think the first thing you need to do is double-check with your BFF and ask her why she thinks these girls are being abused by their dad. Abuse is a pretty serious allegation to make, and you do need to be sure that you have some reason to believe that it's really happening in your friends' home. I'm not saying your BFF would lie to you (or anyone) about this, but I hope you see the importance of trying to find out the truth before you take it to the next level.


The best way to find out the truth is to talk to the girls who are supposedly being abused themselves. If you don't feel comfortable asking, get your BFF to speak to them, or ask them together. (Also, if you feel uncomfortable about asking them about it, think of the alternative, which is NOT asking and letting the abuse - i9f it's really happening - continue.) Once you get some PROOF or EVIDENCE (which makes you believe for sure, for sure that something bad is going on in that home), then it's time to tell someone - an adult you can trust to do take the necessary actions to stop the abuse.


If you feel like it isn't your place or your right to tell anyone what's happening, get your BFF - who seems to be the person the girls went to when they needed to talk to someone about being abused - to do it or, again, do it together. Or, you can tell your friends that, if they're being abused, they need to tell an adult THEY can trust, like their mom, a school counselor, a help crisis line or a police officer. Explain to them that if they don't tell, then you're going to have to go to an adult yourself, because you should never know about someone being abused and not do anything about it.


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Poll

Do You Know Someone Who's Being Neglected?

  • My parents are constantly neglecting me.
  • My friend's parents are very neglectful.
  • Sometimes I feel neglected, but I know I've got it pretty good.
  • No, I don't know anyone who's being neglected.

Dear Dish-It In The Forums

Heyangelhere
My mom! She always watching my every move it's embarrassing sometimes and if I do such a little thing she'll yell at me! And her punishments aren't that bad but still afraid of my mom and for  my dad not so much but he can get mad and do things like mom but yea
reply about 2 hours
GhettoFish
Sure!
reply about 7 hours
Error44
Error44 posted in Friends:
"ValenciaRose" wrote:Well that decision is pretty easy to make. I would rather have one good friend then a lot of friends that I can't find a best friend. After all, if there's one person who knows you the most it's the one good friend that's always been there for you. I can't handle lots of friends who don't want to deal with my problems and only respect me for what they get in return. Thank you my friend, I am agree
reply about 10 hours
Castlemega
Pm me (: i know how you feel
reply 1 day
GhettoFish
Hey, I'm only 13 and I'm already sick of my life, and it's all because of my family, you'd think friends are likely to hurt your emotions some time and you have your family to love you and back you up, for me? No no that's not the case, I have by far the least caring family and that's that. I'm the youngest and my family all treat me like a slave. They don't let me sit at home and play on my PS4, my dad lives separate and my mum don't want me to go there and do nothing either. But they don't let me go out with my friends either not even see them, and I know my family deeply and I know it's cuz they don't want me to enjoy my self or have fun. My siblings will try to make my out as a bad person and a burden to the family. If I try explaining myself if they've got something wrong about me I get shouted out or ignored. And punished sometime for something that I probably didn't even do. And even if they can tell my bro or sis got something wrong about me the rest of the family still back them up to get me in the wrong. I have cried and cried at night hit myself and put physical pressure on my body because of the stress it gives me. I can't speak to my family about it because I'm not allowed my say in anything, I just get ignored or in trouble. I don't know what to do anymore and I think I am depressed because it hurts and what I'm going through stresses me and it gets really hard to try make myself feel happier and better, I am actually considering killing myself but I know it's not the right thing to do and just hurting myself is fine now. But I need your help now. What do I do for myself in this situation? Because I don't know what I can do myself right now. Help! Thanks
reply 1 day