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Dear Dish-It, I'm a Chronic Dater

Dear Dish-It, is here to whisper "ttyl after I've thought about this some more".

Dear Dish-It,

What do boyfriends and girlfriends talk about over the phone?

Dear korean4life,

You know... that's a great question. When you first get a GF/BF it can be really hard to figure out what to say to each other. You both know ya dig each other, but neither of you are used to chattin' it up with the opposite sex. I know peeps who call up their GF or BF and just listen to each other breathe cuz they can't think of one single thing to say other than "Hi." Here are some tips: If ya have some classes together, chat about that. Ask him/her if they thought the test was hard, if they hate the teach as much as you do, if they did the homework, etc. If you have mutual friends, gossip about them. Nothing evil, of course. You don't want your BF/GF to think they're dating a witch. It'll take a while but eventually you guys will be chattin' up a storm.

Dear Dish-It,

I have a really hard time hooking up with a guy and staying with him!!! I don't mean I can't get a boyfriend, but I just can't stand a guy for more than two weeks!!! All my friends are either in long-term relationships or they have a new guy every week. I am the only one who isn't in love with one guy or in love with two or three different guys each week. I never seem to find a guy I really like and when I do find a guy I think I like I try to find a way they are imperfect. My mom keeps saying it's because of previous probs with my dad and I am afraid of being hurt again, so I stay distant from guys. If what my mom said is true, how do I keep my problems with my dad from interfering with my social life? PLEASE GIVE ME SOME ADVICE!

Dear GymRat,

Well, it sounds like you and your mom have made a dent in your probs already. That's good. She's got some pretty good theories. Relationships with other guys in your life - like your dad - could totally effect the way you are with BFs. The key to stopping that, is being aware of it. Next time you've got a BF, and you catch yourself lookin' for problems (with him and the relationship,) talk yourself out of it. Start reminding yourself of all the good things about the dude that made you wanna go out with him in the first place (he's cute, good at sports, funny, etc.) instead of dwelling on the lil' issues (he burps, he's bad at math, he's got dorky shoes, etc.) Remember, everyone has faults.

Then again, the reason you're a chronic dater could be that you haven't found someone who is truly compatible with ya. You shouldn't settle for someone you aren't totally comfortable or in sync with. And, you don't have to date everyone that asks you out. Take your time and really get to know the person.

So, ya gotta burnin' question? Need some love directions? Thinkin' 'bout stuff like depression, sex,how ya feel 'bout YOURSELF (that's called "self-esteem"), boyfriends, girlfriends, losin' old friends, bullyin' or peer pressure, but too scared to ask the parents? Don't be scared to .

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    Friends grow apart as we grow up and change at different rates. It's fine to stop being friends, but it doesn't have to be in a mean way. The best thing to do is talk to her (nicely). You don't have to tell her she's being childish or you feel as if you've matured more. That would be terrible. Talk about things you guys like to do in common or make plans to try new things together. Or don't mention it at all, but don't just begin ignoring her. Eventually the friendship will fade the less time you spend together. 
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