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Dear Dish-It: My Mom Won’t Let Me Grow Up

Jun 18, 2012

Dear Dish-It,

My mom is really scared about me growing up, and I’ve gotten to the age where I need ‘womanly’ advice. What should I do?

Allconfused

Dear Allconfused,

It sounds like it’s time for you and your mom to have “the talk.” What I mean is, it’s time for you to tell your mother that you are growing up (whether she wants you to or not) – and you would really like her to be there to help you through it!

Make an Appointment

It may seem silly cause it’s your mom, but if you’re going to have a serious conversation with her about this then you may want to book some time together where you’ll be left alone to chat without any distractions. If it helps, you may even want to write down some of the things you want to say to her before you meet; that way you’ll be organized and come across sounding mature and respectful.

Put Yourself in Her Shoes

While your goal is definitely to make your mom see things from your perspective, it will help if you can also try to put yourself in her shoes. It’s hard for her to lose her “baby,” and you need to be sensitive to that when you are explaining things to her. Tell her that you understand that she’s worried about your relationship changing, but assure her that you love her and tell her that, no matter what stage of life you’re in, she’ll always be your mom and you hope that she’ll always be there for you.

Ask Questions

If you need her advice about some of the things you’re currently going through, now may or may not be the best time to ask. If you see that your mom is still having a bit of trouble accepting the fact that you are growing up, give her some time to process it and wait a bit before approaching her again. She needs some time to get used to the idea and, if you let her have it, I’m sure she’ll eventually come around and be there to support you on your journey to adulthood!

Have Your Say

Got any good advice for Allconfused? Leave your comment below!

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Most Embarrassing Thing?

  • Tripping down a flight of stairs.
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Dear Dish-It In The Forums

Ashleexo
Ashleexo posted in Family Issues:
"Sophieex_" wrote:I'm not afraid of either of my parents. But if I could choose, my mom. I'm also not afraid of either of my parents at anytime.  But when I was 13 and under and in trouble, it would be my dad.
reply 16 minutes
Arenl
Hey ... I want advice from Dear Dish It .. But I'm unable to figure out how to ask her ... can you guys tell me how ? Thank you :)
reply about 2 hours
AnnaOfExquizurd
Okay, @Abbergrl I'm glad I could help! :D
reply about 9 hours
Abbergrl
Abbergrl posted in Friends:
Thanks @AnnaOfExquizurd that may be very useful to me. And it sounds cool too! :D I thought about just thinking about the positives but didn't really work. I'll try this too!
reply about 9 hours
Abbergrl
Abbergrl posted in Friends:
"Kawaiiqueen389" wrote:My bff is being taken away from me by another girl in our year who is mean to me ...  I really miss her .. What shall I do? That's terrible and has happened and will probably happen with me again. I think you should try being nice to that mean girl even though you don't really like her. If she makes a joke about you just try to laugh at it, don't be hurt by it or make a mean comment back. :)
reply about 9 hours