Kw-halloween-logo-small

Dear Dish-It: Am I Still in Love With My Ex?

Dear Dish-It, 

I have a new boyfriend who I like very much. But when I’m with him, I can’t help comparing everything he does to my ex-boyfriend. Is this normal? Does it mean I’m still in love with my ex?

Confused

Dear Confused,

Comparing your current boyfriend to your ex is completely normal! It doesn’t mean that you’re still in love with your ex at all. Comparing is our way of figuring out if our current partner is more suited to us than the one we left behind.

Growing From Every Relationship

Every relationship we have in life is truly important for our personal growth, whether it lasts a year or only a month. Sharing with another person on an intimate level teaches us many things. We learn what kind of person we are in a relationship, the kind of person we want to be in a relationship, and the kind of partner we do and don’t want.

Comparing Boyfriends

If you’re comparing things like their kissing expertise and your ex comes out on top, don’t write your new man off just yet. Kissing is a skill just like cooking or playing a sport. Maybe your new guy hasn’t had as much practice. Or maybe the two of you just haven’t found your groove yet. However, if you’re comparing things like how he makes you feel special, how he treats you around his friends, and how respectful or reliable he is and your ex still comes out on top, that may simply mean that your current bf isn’t a good match for you.

Mental Checklist

You may still have feelings for your ex, especially if he was your first love, but that’s something only your heart can tell you. Comparing him to your current bf has nothing to do with those feelings. It’s a mental checklist that comes naturally to everyone. How else would we know what we want without comparing to what we once had? So don’t feel guilty about it, girl! It's all part of the learning process.

Have Your Say

Got any good advice for Confused? Leave your comment below!

  

>
>

readers voted!

Comments

Mayumi12

Mayumi12 wrote:

Can u please forget about this ex's
commented: Mon Sep 01, 2014

Mayumi12

Mayumi12 wrote:

Past is past... Why compare though
commented: Mon Sep 01, 2014

rescueheart

rescueheart wrote:

I just broke up with my boyfriend and i still love him
commented: Wed Jul 02, 2014

there are 288 more comments

Please login or register to add comments


like this article?
Sign up now to get more just like!

latest videos

Poll

Who's More Important - BF or BFF?

  • Your BFF is way more important.
  • You gotta stay loyal to your BF.
  • They are equally important.
  • I guess it depends on your situation.

related stories

Nikki asks: "My ex bf Mikey hates me because I'm going out with his cousin. What should I do?"
I was dating my best friend for about a week when she said I was too much like a brother to her a...
I can't get over my ex. How do I move on?
My ex wants to go back with me. I told him no I don't like you no more, but we can be friends. He...

Dear Dish-It in the forums

Charulata
Charulata posted in Style:
A small earring :) Nothing else in my body :p :D♥
reply about 5 hours
bernese7
bernese7 posted in Style:
how can i lighten my hair color without dying it?????????
reply about 18 hours
AlphaT
AlphaT posted in Family Issues:
"daredog" wrote:I told them why b it ALOT of gay and lesbians say they lost there friends.. but I want to be myself and I think myself is a lesbian thanks for support from everyone! :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D Well, that takes bravery, and I can admire that at least.
reply about 18 hours
Emma40
Emma40 posted in Friends:
So I like this guy in school. But I don't know if he likes me. How can I tell if he likes me? Does he like me?
reply about 22 hours
Bunnoo
Bunnoo posted in Friends:
(There is no such thing as perfect.) Someone who loves you is perfect enough.
reply 1 day

play online games

Candy-100

A great online version of the famous Candy Crush. This is the best game launched...

Big_icon_(7)

Have you ever fancied being a ranger like those fantasy characters you love so m...

Big_icon_(4)

You run across the city in a car chase with the police officers.

Big_icon_(6)

The evil master kidnapped all of your friends!

Ow_fright_ad_100x100

Explore the world or hang out with friends in your own condo. Get a unique look,...