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Dear Dish-It, My BF Wants to Do Drugs


Dear Dish-It, is here to whisper "ttyl after I've thought about this some more".


Dear Dish-It,

My problem is that I like this boy! He is 19 and I am 15! But my friend also likes him! The thing is, she is 19 too. But he also has a girlfriend! Even so, I still want to be with him but I am trying to hook him and my friend up. She has been acting immature but he likes older girls anyway. The thing is, I don't care if he likes older girls, I still want to talk to him! So what should I do?
Tee-Tee

Dear Tee-Tee,

I think you knew the answer to your own question before you even asked it. Although some of your friends may be older than you, that doesn't mean it's a good idea to date a guy that's four years older than you are. It may not seem like a big difference, and it wouldn't be a big deal if you were a few years older, but the fact remains that you two are living in two entirely separate worlds right now. Whether your friend is acting immature or not, let her have this guy for now and keep your eyes peeled for some one a little closer to your own age. Believe me, there are cool guys your age out there!

Dear Dish-It,

My boyfriend wants to do some drugs. I don't like the word drug or anything or anyone that has anything to do with them, and I told him this. We've been dating since May and I have lots of feelings for him. I don't want to try and change anyone but I think that if he does this stuff, I would want to break up with him. The only problem is that it would be hard because my feelings for him have grown these past 7 months. Should he be respectful of my concerns or am I just being a nagging girlfriend?
katie

Dear katie,

You have every reason to feel uncomfortable about your boyfriend wanting to experiment with drugs and you should definitely voice your concerns. Tell him that not only are you uncomfortable hanging with people who use, you are also worried about his safety. The fact remains that drug experimentation is just that - experimentation. Everyone's body reacts totally differently to each and every drug and you can never predict what's going to happen. Although it'll be tough letting your guy go, you've gotta stand up for what you believe in and talk to your guy about his hasty decision. Have your boyfriend check out www.dare.com. It's a great resource on drugs, especially for teens, that may give your boyfriend something to stop and think about.


So, ya gotta burnin' question? Need some love directions? Thinkin' 'bout stuff like depression, sex,how ya feel 'bout YOURSELF (that's called "self-esteem"), boyfriends, girlfriends, losin' old friends, bullyin' or peer pressure, but too scared to ask the parents? Don't be scared to here. But 'member, if ya hang out in Chat with other Kidzworld members who know ya by your 'username', ya might wanna use a secret nickname when ya write in. That way no one'll ever know it's you. And, just in case ya don't know, Dish-It gets a lotta letters everyday, and she can't answer 'em all. So keep checkin' the column cuz she's prob'ly answerin' somethin' very similar to your question while you're out doin' somethin' else. K? And Thanks! Ya keep her outta trouble. Oh! And if ya've got words of wisdom you wanna share, We'll dish 'em up, too.


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'Fess Up! Do You Use Drugs?

  • I've dabbled in 'em.
  • I do 'em every weekend.
  • Never! I'm totally against them.
  • I tried 'em once, but would never do 'em again.

Dear Dish-It In The Forums

rainbowpoptart
Goodness... I see where your mother is coming from: if you eat too much, no matter how healthy the food is, and don't work off the calories, you're going to gain weight. But she's being very obsessive and dramatic about it. There is nothing wrong with eating pizza or a cookie every now and then, and there's nothing wrong with relaxing from time to time either. As long as you aren't constantly eating junk and not burning the calories, then you do not have a problem. Eating unhealthy things every now and then does not make you fat. EATING every now and then does not make you fat. Try explaining this to her, calmly and patiently. Tell her that you don't want to be forced to do all of this exercising - being forced to exercise makes it a lot less interesting. Do not take "This is for your own good" for an answer; if you do not want to do it, it is NOT for your good. (This, of course, would be a different story if you were actually fat.) ALSO tell her that exercising too much and not satiating your cravings is JUST AS UNHEALTHY AS BEING FAT IS. If you were to not eat healthful meals and not snack every now and then, no matter how healthy or unhealthy the food is, plus exercise so frequently, you would not be healthy.  Eating is good for you, even if the food isn't. Eating too little and eating too much is not healthy. Exercise is good for you. Not exercising enough and exercising too much is not good for you. If you talking to her doesn't help, try telling another adult how you feel, and maybe they can help get it through to her. Regardless of what happens, take care of yourself. Moderate how much you eat, but don't limit yourself to less than you feel you need. Exercise, but don't do something you don't want to; working out should be fun. Good luck with everything. I'm really sorry that she makes you feel so badly about this.
reply about 7 hours
jake495
jake495 posted in Family Issues:
Make sure she knows its your body not hers In a respectful way of course
reply about 8 hours
ThePaleWalker636
I'm perfectly happy with myself. I'm around 5'6" and somewhere between 140-150 pounds, and I don't feel fat. But my mom is constantly telling me that I am, or, at least, that I'm going to be. She forces me to go to exercise classes because I don't like many sports, tries making me go on diets, but I don't want to. She tells me that if I continue the way I am, having an extra cookie once in a while and only eating cereal for breakfast, that I'll end up fat, and she makes sure to emphasize how horrible that is for a person to live with. She rolls her eyes and sighs whenever she sees me getting a snack, and just in general makes me feel awful for eating the things I like and for relaxing. I've told her that I don't want to do these things and that she makes me feel bad when she says things like that, but she swears it's for my own good and that I should never want to be fat, that it ruins people's lives. How should I deal with this?
reply about 8 hours
drowning
drowning posted in Friends:
"NS12" wrote: I meet this guy at a festival and we have been talking for the whole week and my mum has noticed I keep texting someone and I know I need to tell her but I don t know how I am going to tell her, I doubt she ll get angry or anything but he lives about 4/5 hours away from me. I know I need to tell her as I don t like keeping secrets from her. I know this was a bit ago, but I truly hope that you were able to be open with your mother. If you feel as if they won't get mad at you, then chances are that your guardian will not. Honesty is the best policy, and if you feel guilt keeping a secret, then it is one you probably shouldn't be keeping.
reply 1 day
drowning
I agree with @rainbowpoptart. You really shouldn't worry about relationships that much given your age. I promise, they're better things to worry about than boys and more secure romances occur later on in life anyways. But, given the situation, you shouldn't worry about either. The boy is unfaithful and so is your friend. If your best friend really valued your friendship, she would not have put it in a position that could end it. Don't waste your time on those who will not put you first just as you do for them; better people will come into your life and they are the ones who you should really worry about.
reply 1 day