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Dear Dish-It, Why Don't Girls Treat Me Right? (pg. 2)


Dear Dish-It, is here to whisper "ttyl after I've thought about this some more".


Dear Lonely Pain,

You know how there are always those girls who are drawn to the guys who are the big jerks? They let their boyfriends treat them like crap, even though they're usually really sweet and friendly. It looks like you have gotten yourself trapped in a very similar dating pattern. I have no doubt that you're a great guy, but you aren't so great at making a stand for yourself. Relationships aren't just about being the sweetest guy who will do anything for their girl. It sounds like you are constantly attracting the girls who know you will do anything to make them happy - even if they treat you like crap. Your goal should be to be a great BF and a guy who can take time for himself and work on being a better person, not just a better boyfriend. The relationship you are in right now is never going to work if you don't make a stand for your own happiness. If your GF can't stop with the raggin' then you're going to have to send her packin'. And instead of worrying about having the perfect GF, worry about having fun with friends and family. You'll be much more likely to meet the one if you stop trying so hard!


Dear Dish-It,

I'm 16 and about a month ago a started dating this girl. She is smart, fun, and so incredibly beautiful. She has been in several relationships before me, and she was treated so badly. All of those guys were with her to get some "action" and she does not want to have sex before she is married. Most guys treat girls as if they are objects and that they are only there to please the guy. But I don't think they are there for that. Girls should be treated with the utmost respect that they deserve. I know that sounds like crap coming from a high school student (guy,) but I'm not like all the other guys. I treat my girl like a princess. Everything that we do together, I do for her. I try to put her before me. I've told her that I really care about her, and that I would never do anything to hurt her. Last Monday I took her out and I asked her if I ever annoyed her she said that I didn't but that I was weird. Weird in the sense that she has never seen a guy act as polite as I do. I asked her if that was a bad thing, she said it wasn't, but that it made her laugh!? I don't know if her intentions are genuine or not or if she is just using me. It would totally break my heart if she is. I don't want her to get hurt - she means so much to me. Please help if you can.
buzzed921


Dear buzzed921,

Sit down and take a couple deep breaths. Being in love for the first time can often be very overwhelming and sometimes you start to act a little out of the ordinary. You get paranoid for no reason and sometimes end up causing silly problems in your relationship that were never actually issues to begin with. Your girl is not using you and I'm sure her intentions are genuine. She probably just sees you trying too hard to make her happy, when the truth is, she's just happy bein' your girl. You don't need to put her feelings ahead of yours all the time and everything you do should not be to make her happy (you need to be happy too!) You need balance in a relationship or someone, (in this case your girlfriend,) is going to feel smothered. She already knows how great you are, that's why she's dating you in the first place. So stop with the drama, relax and be happy that you are with this super-fly girl.


So, ya gotta burnin' question? Need some love directions? Thinkin' 'bout stuff like depression, sex,how ya feel 'bout YOURSELF (that's called "self-esteem"), boyfriends, girlfriends, losin' old friends, bullyin' or peer pressure, but too scared to ask the parents? Don't be scared to .


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  • 7 Comments

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    Dear Dish-It in the forums

    astucieuse331
    astucieuse331 posted in Friends:
    I've always felt the same way. My one best friend gossiped behind my back, used me, all that girl stuff. She took me for advantage and we had a bunch of fights because of her finding a new friend and completely acting as if I didn't exist, and I told her to give me at least some attention every once in a while if she can't even continue to talk to me daily. And.. I lost her. Well, she lost me. We both lost each other. But then I realized.. it's the people that you least expect to be nice to you you'll find kindness in. Why? Based on personal experience, and I'll tell you the story: For my gym class, me and my peers were supposed to make a group for a dance. This was when my best friend had found a new friend already, and the time at which we had a few fights because of that. Of course, I relied on my best friend to count me in her dance group. At lunchtime, I sat together with my best friend, and we ate our lunches in silence. All of a sudden, I brought up the dance groups and asked her straightforwardly: "Can I join your group?" No reply. "Kelly, can I join your group?" No reply. "I mean, since our class is uneven, I found it fair that there'd be a group of five, you know?" None at all. Kelly ignored me straight off the bat, leaving me speechless. My mind raced with thoughts, and I thought, maybe it's not worth having Kelly as a friend. A few days later, we were playing Dodgeball for gym. I was on Kelly's team, and overheard her talking with her new friends about who to pick for the dance group. One of her friends mentioned me, and Kelly said: "Oh no, we shouldn't pick her because _____ (I don't know what she said then)." I was shocked, but was anticipating it, so when the time came to choose groups, I saw my friend, Luke, ask two girls, Cher and Bridgette, to join their group. Surprisingly, Cher and Bridgette actually accepted him, and so I thought, "Wow, if they accepted Luke, they might accept me aswell!" and so built up the courage to ask them if I could join. Even though Cher and Bridgette were mean to me sometimes, I knew that I had to risk it and see what'd happen. Afterall, rejection is just another opportunity to find a better group. Little did I know, it'd be the best choice of my life. They were so happy, and even thanked me for joining them! I was speechless once more; I never knew that the peers that I thought I would never be friends with would actually be my friends!  So yeah, that's what I learnt, and I never regretted learning that fact. Ever since then, though, I've learnt not to trust people as much as I used to anymore. I learnt that independency is what works for me, what I was meant for in terms of socializing or working. But, other things may work for you. If you still want a friend, you can be independent and wait for the right person. However, if you still want a real friend, you can wait, but still mingle (hang out) with other people! I I'm not going to make fun of you because I know how you've felt, just as I stated in my past problem before. But you can move on from those friends, they're not worth your time and certainly don't deserve you as a friend. Trust me, if it's meant to be, you'll definitely find a true friend. But if it's not, you may become like me, finding happiness in my own way. I want to remind you though-- you don't need someone to stay happy, or keep you company. This may sound silly, but you can even have your own invisible friends! I've had one, but that's very rarely for me. It's not silly though if you see the general idea; usually these friends are made from different dimensions of your personality or just because of will. There's a lot more fish in the sea, though, so I'm sure you'll find a true friend that's meant for you  :) Take care, and I hope you'll find a true friend soon!
    reply about 6 hours
    ts01
    ts01 posted in Friends:
    im so sorry you girls feel that way.true friends are there, its just easier to find users because they are more plentiful. dont give up, you will find real friends eventually
    reply about 7 hours
    lolflowergirl
    lolflowergirl posted in Friends:
    i feel alone too
    reply about 9 hours
    kayme123
    kayme123 posted in Friends:
    i know the feeling. but i got taken off a website instead of my friends. i can assure you they probably feel the same and are missing you, BUT its not worth dwelling over it. friends come and go without any choice in life and trust me, i lost the love of my life and my two of the best friends in the world. The thing is, you have to move on, because they wouldent want you feeling sad over them right? they'd want you to be the happy person you were when you were with them! for starters, i'll be your friend so your not scared to make some new ones. To be honest, i went through the exact same thing as you did and it DOES hurt very bad. But once you find some people that are willing to make you feel better, you know you've chosen the right friends again
    reply about 18 hours
    Irene_love
    Irene_love posted in Style:
    "1.am.3m0" wrote:Hey. Im also turning 15 soon. So dont worry you arent alone hahah. Start dressing for your shape and also find whats comfortable.  Because if you wear something that is uncomfortable you wont be happy and happiness is the best look :) Most of the time I wear jeans with a graphic tshirt or singlet and a cardigan or light jacket. Hoodies are great for winter. And I wear combat boots like doc martins and converse. Hope I helped somehow! :)
    reply about 19 hours

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