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Dear Dish-It, Does Race Matter?

Dear Dish-It,

I'm 14 and I've been with my boyfriend for four-and-a-half months now. However, there are some things I'm having trouble with. He's Asian American, and I'm European American, so many of my relatives are racist to him and call him "Ching Chong" and stuff, even though he's Hmong, not Chinese. They talk about how I shouldn't go out with him because we're different races. However, we both totally love each other, and the only problems are what other people think. Also, my dad doesn't think it's a real relationship since I'm so young. It bugs me. My boyfriend and I, though, have no problems with each other - he's totally sweet and loves me. I just want to know what to say to people when they diss us for being an interracial couple or that it isn't a real relationship cuz we're young.
Kee

Dear Kee,

I'm sorry to hear that your family is making things difficult for you and your guy. When you fall in love with someone, you can't help but hope that all the important people in your life (family and friends) will see why you are crazy about this person. Unfortunately, sometimes your fam disappoints you and you're left to decide how much their opinion matters to you. The way your fam is acting towards your BF is incredibly immature and inappropriate. There is no doubt in my mind that what you and your boyfriend have is a real relationship. Will it be the relationship you stay in for the rest of your life? Probably not - but that doesn't give your family the right to treat you or your BF with disrespect. Sit down with the 'rents and let them know how you feel about how they are treating your guy. They might not change the way they've been actin' but at least you can say you stood up for what's important to you. You're probably going to have to learn to let other people's comments slide off your back and just enjoy your relationship on your own. In the end, you're the one who's dating this guy and not the rest of the world, so just forget about what they have to say!

Dear Dish-It,

I really like this guy, but he's black and I am white. I really don't have a problem with that, but I don't know if I should have a problem. Also I want to ask him to the school dance that is coming up but I am so nervous that I can barely type. I asked my friend to do it for me. Was that a smart decision or should I ask him?
patricesgrrl03

Dear patricesgrrl03,

Why do you think you should have a problem with dating this dude because of his skin color? If he's cool and you think you two would click, then there's nothing else standing in your way. You're obviously mackin' on him, so why not ask him to the school dance yourself? It's usually best to leave the middleman (in this case, your friend,) out of your love life cuz it makes things less complicated. If you need a friend by your side when you actually ask this guy to the dance, that's cool, but try talking to him face-to-face if possible. Good Luck!

So, ya gotta burning question? Need some love directions? Thinking 'bout stuff like depression, sex,how ya feel 'bout YOURSELF (that's called "self-esteem"), boyfriends, girlfriends, losing old friends, bullying or peer pressure, but too scared to ask the parents? Don't be scared to here. But 'member, if ya hang out in Chat with other Kidzworld members who know ya by your 'username', ya might wanna use a secret nickname when ya write in. That way no one will ever know it's you. And, just in case ya don't know, Dish-It gets a lot of letters everyday, and she can't answer 'em all. So keep checking the column because she's probably answering something very similar to your question while you're out doing something else. K? And Thanks! Ya keep her outta trouble. Oh! And if you have got words of wisdom you wanna share, We'll dish 'em up, too.

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Dear Dish-It in the forums

OwlSalsa
OwlSalsa posted in Friends:
YEs I have been bullied. A lot. People who I think are my friends are back stabbers. They suddenly just like turn on me. I've had rumours spread about me and I was so sad. I hated being bullied. But the best thing to do if you are being bullied is to hold your head high and not cry. Because if you show a single tear that is what the bully wants And it will take you as an easy target and will bully you more and more and more and more. And bullies won't stop until you stand up to them.
reply about 7 hours
Tati-00
Tati-00 posted in Family Issues:
I would also talk to them and tell them how you feel. If they still say they are signing you up for the membership as a 13 year old and it scares you that much I would just tell them to leave you off the membership until you do turn 13.
reply about 10 hours
Tati-00
Tati-00 posted in Family Issues:
I think every house has some drama going on in it everyday. In my house my Mom is a divorced mother of 3 kids. My older sister is away at college but when she was here there were yelling matches between my mom and her about staying out too late and getting a speeding ticket. Also with my mom being the only one raising us she has to work full time leaving me to watch my little brother who is 10 after he gets home from school. There also can be some battles that go on there and my mom doesn't want to here it from me or him when she walks through the door after work. I just try to not make it all personal and chalk it up to the stress of everyday life.
reply about 10 hours
american_brit
"Tati-00" wrote:I would tell your mother no. I mean she shouldn't be like a dictator and force it on you. I hardly wear any make-up and my mom loves that.
reply about 11 hours
Tati-00
Tati-00 posted in Family Issues:
I would tell your mother No. I mean she shouldn't be like a dictator and force it on you. I hardly wear any make-up and my mom loves that.
reply about 11 hours

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