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Dear Dish-It, My Mom Embarrasses Me!


Dear Dish-It, is here to whisper "ttyl after I've thought about this some more".


Dear Dish-It,

My mom is so embarrassing when it comes to puberty. Even when I got my first bra she was so fussy and told the whole street. I mean, it's not as if she's old or anything, I'm 13 and she's 38, but now I'm too embarrassed to wear a bra. I'm absolutely petrified of when I start my period - she will embarrass me to bits. She's already saying all this stuff about us being the "ladies of the house" and I will be too scared to tell her when I start my period. It would be great if I had an older sister, then my mom might not be so embarrassing about it. It's like she's excited about me starting puberty! No one else I've spoke to seems to have the same problem and I'm even scared to shave my legs in case she sees me and gets embarrassing again! Please, please, please help!
tinerbex13


Dear tinerbex13,

Your friends may not have encountered the same reactions from their moms about puberty, but that doesn't mean you're alone. Your mom's "embarrassing" actions are just her way of showing her love. Puberty can be a scary and embarrassing time in your life, but for your mom it means that you're not a little girl anymore. Most likely, she remembers going through puberty as a really exciting time in her life so she is naturally excited for you to experience the same things. Although you may not want her to run up and down the block telling all the neighbors about your new bra, it is much better to have a mom who is open and honest about all this stuff.


Puberty is not something to be ashamed of - all women have to go through it at some point in their lives so you may as well embrace it. You're not going to ward it off by not wearing a bra or withholding information from your mom. Just accept that you've hit that point in your life and make the best of it. Most importantly, talk to your mom. Tell her that her over-the-top antics kind of embarrass you and try to figure out a way that she can talk to you about these things without you getting freaked out. Hope this helped - good luck!


Tell your mom to stop it. If it embarrasses you, then why are you writing it online if you dont want anyone to know? Tell your mom how you feel. Tell her that you can't stand it when she embarrasses you like that. Tell her that you know she is proud of you and that you respect her but she needs to hold some stuff in. My mom was the same way!

Kidz Submit by:

Nickname: nikkij93
Age: 13

So, ya gotta burnin' question? Need some love directions? Thinkin' 'bout stuff like depression, sex,how ya feel 'bout YOURSELF (that's called "self-esteem"), boyfriends, girlfriends, losin' old friends, bullyin' or peer pressure, but too scared to ask the parents? Don't be scared to .


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    Dear Dish-It In The Forums

    PARTYHAT
    PARTYHAT posted in Family Issues:
    hey,  im so sorry about that, but one thing this reminds me of is my grandpa. he passed away when my dad was 12 years old and i never got to see him, he sounds soo nice. keep going  :thumbsup
    reply about 7 hours
    Littkekawaiiigirl
    I have a friend, she was so nice and funny when my best friend and I met her on the first day of school. As months passed she started getting annoying. The way she texts, acts, and talks is starting to get annoying. Then she is becoming such a drama queen now. What should I do?
    reply about 10 hours
    Kirsteeeeen
    Thank you for sharing something that has helped you cope with loss, and I'm sorry that you lost your friend and had to go through the grief and pain. I don't know what it is like, but I know there are a lot of people who do and would appreciate that you shared that way of coping. I hope that you are continuing to find more ways to deal with it, and don't forget those good memories you have with her. They'll always be yours to cherish.
    reply about 11 hours
    Kirsteeeeen
    Hi Wonderfulcalico, I'm sorry to hear you're in such a bad situation. It must be tough, and it must be having a profound negative impact on you and those around you. It sounds like your mom has some things she needs to work out. But know that this behaviour from your parents is not okay. You shouldn't have to be subjected to this type of environment, which is toxic for your health physically and mentally. It also sounds like it is physically dangerous and it is making you live in fear, which is not okay. It is NOT your fault. If you feel that you are being abused, please get another trusted adult involved. Don't act on things that make you feel unsafe or confront your parents directly if you know they will act in a dangerous way. Your safety is number one. Try contacting another adult such as a teacher, a nurse, a doctor, a worship leader, social worker, child protective services, or call the police. Remember that 911 is also an option in any emergency, and that includes yourself being in danger from physical abuse. You can also call Your Life, Your Voice at 1-800-448-3000 , message them online, or even text them, or contact another local help line that you know. Please take care of yourself and stay safe. I know you may not want to do any of these things, and it's okay to feel that way, but also remember how important your safety is and make that a priority. 
    reply about 11 hours
    KayKayZ
    KayKayZ posted in Friends:
    Hmm, okay, well I'll try to give you the best advice that I can, Error. So you say you don't like your friend for a number of reasons: Liar, bad influence, uses swear words, too blunt, etc. I feel like some of these could be over-looked, such as the swearing and the 'bad influence' part. Really, all you have to do is just not copy her actions, and they won't be influential at all. If you disagree, it shouldn't be hard to just refuse to follow in her steps. However, lying isn't the best quality I would look for in a friend.  She doesn't seem like an enjoyable person to be around in general, which is why you are making this post, obviously. But I'm gonna ask you something here. Don't you think that, in a way, you're lying too? You're pretending to be her friend solely for purposes of monetary value because, I assume, your family cannot pay for or get you to gymnastic class themselves. If this is true, that's kind of bad, isn't it? It sounds like, to me, that your friendship isn't exactly a healthy relationship at all. But I'm gonna sympathize with you, since I know gymnastics must be important to you, and you wouldn't be doing this if you didn't have a good reason. So, what should you do about it? Well, personally I think there are a few things you could do. You could stop being her friend, therefore no longer having to deal with her; but in the process lose access to your gymnastics class and have to look for it in another way. On the flip side, you could continue to put up with her, which would probably not be in your best interests, but you'd still get to attend your class. Or, you could try talking to her about it. Ask her what she really thinks of your friendship, if she actually values you as her friend. Maybe you two can talk about problems that you're having with each other and work on fixing them. This option could have negative effects, since she might want to stop being your friend or things could become very awkward after that. But it's probably your best bet to be honest with her, as you'd hope she would be with you. How about if you tried being really nice to her? Kindness is contagious, and perhaps if you treat her well enough, she'll start doing the same to you. I feel like maybe if you complimented her, told her things that you really like about her, maybe even got her gifts or made her food once in a while, that she would come to appreciate you and all that you do for her. And in turn, she might start to respect you more herself, and become a good friend. That's about all I can say. If you're close enough with her mom, maybe you could even try asking her about her daughter and see if she can give you any advice. Hopefully that helped in some way, but if it didn't, maybe it at least made you think? I hope your problem gets resolved, Error, and you can be content with the outcome of it. :-)
    reply 4 days