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Dear Dish-It, My Ex Is Being A Jerk

Lose That Jerk Of An Ex

Dear Dish-It,

This month, my boyfriend broke up with me. It would have been four months if he'd let it last. But now he keeps being this total jerk. And the thing about him breaking up with me is, he didn't say it to my face and he didn't say it himself – one of my friends did. And then he says mean things and keeps going out with my BFFL's (not so much anymore). I want to ask him about the whole thing, but I don't want him to say something again or not listen or anything else. I'm so super scared. What can I do so I don't get my feelings crushed again?

TotallyHeartBroken


Dear TotallyHeartBroken,


I feel for you – I really do. I’ve been through it before, too. In fact, most of us will go through a heartbreak or two during our lives. It’s normal and natural and, even though you may not be able to see how this could be possible right now, it makes you a stronger and better person in the long run. Pain and hard times always have a way of doing that, because painful and difficult situations always present a hidden lesson to us. If we look hard enough and choose to learn from these lessons, we can come out the other side of pain stronger and better people than we were before.


Having said that, I know you’re feeling incredibly hurt and disappointed right now. I know you want to talk to your ex and find out all the answers to all your questions that keep lingering on in your mind. However, no matter how big a jerk he’s being or how much he continues to hurt you, I think you need to be the strongest you can be right now and try not to let anything he says or does affect you. In other words, I truly think you should just let this go and write this guy off. Don’t ever speak to him again if you can help it.


Trying to talk to your ex would only show him (and everyone else, including yourself) that you are not over him. That is the last thing you want to do. You ,main goal right now is getting over him – and that means moving on. And the best way I know how to do this is to end all contact and try your best to forget about the past.


Easier said than done, I know. But it’s doable – trust me! You just have to believe in yourself and rely on your friends and family a bit for the next little while. Believe that you deserve better than what this guy gave and is giving you. Believe that there are plenty of fish in the sea and that your relationship with your ex will by no means be your last. Hang out with your friends and family more, and talk to them when you are feeling blue. Talking to your ex about your feelings at this point will not make you feel any better. You need to surround yourself with people who love and care for you, and who wouldn’t in a million years do anything to hurt you.


Stay strong, and you’ll make it through this!


So, ya gotta burnin' question? Need some love directions? Thinkin' 'bout stuff like depression, sex,how ya feel 'bout YOURSELF (that's called "self-esteem"), boyfriends, girlfriends, losin' old friends, bullyin' or peer pressure, but too scared to ask the parents? Don't be scared to Dish-It here. Send all of your questions to deardish@kidzworld.com But 'member, if ya hang out in Chat with other Kidzworld members who know ya by your 'username', ya might wanna use a secret nickname when ya write in. That way no one'll ever know it's you. And, just in case ya don't know, Dish-It gets a lotta letters everyday, and she can't answer 'em all. So keep checkin' the column cuz she's prob'ly answerin' somethin' very similar to your question while you're out doin' somethin' else. K? And Thanks! Ya keep her outta trouble. Oh! And if ya've got words of wisdom you wanna share,We'll dish 'em up, too.


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Comments

desiray210

desiray210 wrote:

my ex is being a jerk bcz i wont call him
commented: Wed Oct 30, 2013

Kat_The_Gamer

Kat_The_Gamer wrote:

My ex is back in England...so glad I left, he cheated then questioned why I broke up wi...
commented: Sun Sep 15, 2013

JennyD

JennyD wrote:

Hopefully I won't go through one
commented: Sun Sep 15, 2013

there are 14 more comments

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Dear Dish-It in the forums

LostintheAbyss
Dear Dish-it, This is really strange for me to write to you because I have never done anything like this before but I need an outside POV from my situation and I need help. These days, I don't know what I'm doing or what tomorrow is going to bring. But before I get into how I feel, I am going to explain my situation a bit first. So let's get started. My family is a family of 6 though my oldest sibling has left the house to live else where because he's 26 years old. Anyway, I argue a lot in my family in fact there's fights everyday either with me or just between other family members. I don't remember a time that we didn't fight... Sad ain't it? But I try and not let it bother me. My mom and me have the best and worst relationship out there. At one time, we understand ourselves completely but then something happens and the arguments stop... It always ends with her angry and me frustrated, crying and angry... I have cried more in the past year and half (That is when it got worst) Then my entire lifespan so far. Plus since she had a bad childhood, she tries to make everything different from hers but she ALWAYS compares me to her. I am a different person than her and she just doesn't understand that! I always feel really bad after because she wants me to be the perfect child but I can't and I never will be. I am just me. Like today, I punched a wall because I just wanted to feel something else than sadness and worst thing is that I fake smiles and optimism at school so nobody knows. My friends don't understand even though I have told them but now I brush it off. It's not their life so they don't need to understand it. But that's my situation... Now that you have heard something about me, I need help. I'm sending myself in the abyss. I am losing control. I feel as if everything is slipping from my fingers and everything is falling apart. I don't know what's happening to me! I am losing myself and I don't know what to do! It's hard to keep up my grades, to make sure that everything is done, that I go to my activities after school. It feels so hard to do right now... I throw things and slam doors when I am super mad. I don't have anger issues but I keep in so many emotions that I explode when I can't take them anymore. My world seems to be crumbling before my eyes. My family is in debt, my parents might split and my brothers hate me. My dog, running, drawing and books are my only escape.  I don't know what to do... Sincerely LostintheAbyss
reply about 4 hours
hugebear
hugebear posted in Style:
snickers mkay and Im closing this thread now :) BR yush you is fabulous too mate :D
reply about 8 hours
Boysrock50
Boysrock50 posted in Style:
I'm fabulous :D
reply about 8 hours
Snickers147
Snickers147 posted in Style:
Kk 
reply about 8 hours
hugebear
hugebear posted in Style:
Your welcomes and I thinks that we can close this thread now mkay  :)
reply about 8 hours

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