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Dear Dish-It: My BF Is Moving

Dear Dish-It,


A common topic in life is: are you really in love? My answer? YES. I am in love with my boyfriend, Austin. We've been going out a few months but we've loved each other for years. He's an awesome guy. I'm 13, and he's turning 15 in September. Although he's older, our love for each other will never change. Now here's where the conflict comes in: his parents are going to divorce and he’s moving about an hour or two away. He'll still be going to my school, and soon he'll be able to drive. But it's summer, I barely see him, my mom doesn't seem to like him when he does come over and his dad is an abusive drunk. He's really unhappy about not seeing me enough. I am too! Every night I cry and cry about it, and so does he. We just get worse and worse, being apart from each other. Please help me! What can I do about this? How can I get through it?


Wounded_Soul


Dear WS,


Wow, I can tell you love Austin. I hope that he loves you back just as much, even if you are both moving into a time of your life that could turn out to be bittersweet. Unfortunately, you may not like my advice. I know you hope the two of you will be able to stay together despite the distance his move has created, but I must warn you: long-distance relationships are hard (as you know) and often don’t work out. All it takes is a little time and space and then you meet someone new and the old relationship seems like not much more than a memory …


I’m not saying it WON’T work out between the two of you. I’m just giving you a dose of reality. I firmly believe that if it’s meant to be then it will be and, instead of wasting your time crying, you should adopt the same belief – I’m positive it will give you more hope, no matter what the future brings.


Here’s the other thing. You and Austin are so lucky to live in a world of incredible communication technology – there’s no reason you can’t be in touch with each other even when you’re physically apart! I know nothing can replace actually being together in person, but you and Austin have all this technology in front of you. You can do video chat, talk on Skype for free, text 20 times a day (though I don't recommend it) or send long e-mails. While the odds are very much against this type of relationship, I've heard enough interesting stories in my life to realize that odds are just that — odds.


If you've got a burning question, need some love advice or find yourself thinking about things like sex, depression, self-esteem, boyfriends, girlfriends, best friends, bullying or peer pressure, don't hesitate to Dish-It here. Send your questions to deardish@kidzworld.com. And if you hang out in the chat rooms with other Kidzworld members who know you by your username, just send in your secret question using a different nickname if you want to stay anonymous – we promise that no one will ever know it's you. Remember: Dish-It gets a load of letters every day so it may take a while to reply to yours. Keep checking back for her reply, or watch for answered Dish-It questions that are similar to your own.


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  • 9 Comments

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    Dear Dish-It in the forums

    moongemowl
    moongemowl posted in Friends:
    Okay, I've NEVER posted anything about my friends before, so bear with me. I've known that me and my BFF have the same crush since we met in 5th grade. But it always seems that my BFF is closer to him than I'll ever be. They went to 2 school dances together while I'm still in the friend zone with my crush. I pretend to not care but I really do care. I've never been in this situation before and don't know what to do about it. Should I tell my BFF how I feel or wait this whole thing out? Or even forget my crush being my crush and find a new crush? HELP!!!!!   :love :confused
    reply about 5 hours
    jordand08
    Maybe that's the only line that needs to be said? You don't have to write down a whole paragraph explaining about how you feel. Sometimes, one word or one sentence can be enough. :p but I don't know. Maybe I have no clue what I'm talking about. :p
    reply about 5 hours
    jordand08
    You'll have to remember, your parents love you, with that being said. If you feel like you can talk to them and they're reasonable, go ahead. But if you feel like waiting it's up to you. I think your family will support you, because they do love you. Maybe they'll be upset at first, but they'll come around, everyone does eventually. Is there anyone in your family that knows, like a cousin? Maybe you can ask for their opinion if you should tell your parents, and family. However, it's up to you. and remember, your parents care and love you.
    reply about 5 hours
    hugebear
    hugebear posted in Family Issues:
    You doesnt have to come out to your family until your ready and until they is ready too.  If you blurt it out it could be the shock.  You says that you think your Mums side of the family will be more supportive.  Has you got an Aunty or Uncle what you could discuss this with?  An adult member of your family what is most likely supportive  could probably give the best advises on how to tell your family and when and how and prepares you for how they will react. Good luck mate and takes your time :angel
    reply about 11 hours
    Mrawsomegamer
    I think my mothers side of the family would be fine with it. It's my dad's side I'm most concerned about. My dad says some dreadfully terrible remarks about homosexual people. I think I'm not gunna tell him at all. Ever...  Either way. Thanks for the advice!
    reply about 11 hours

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