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Dear Dish-It: My BF Is Moving

Dear Dish-It,


A common topic in life is: are you really in love? My answer? YES. I am in love with my boyfriend, Austin. We've been going out a few months but we've loved each other for years. He's an awesome guy. I'm 13, and he's turning 15 in September. Although he's older, our love for each other will never change. Now here's where the conflict comes in: his parents are going to divorce and he’s moving about an hour or two away. He'll still be going to my school, and soon he'll be able to drive. But it's summer, I barely see him, my mom doesn't seem to like him when he does come over and his dad is an abusive drunk. He's really unhappy about not seeing me enough. I am too! Every night I cry and cry about it, and so does he. We just get worse and worse, being apart from each other. Please help me! What can I do about this? How can I get through it?


Wounded_Soul


Dear WS,


Wow, I can tell you love Austin. I hope that he loves you back just as much, even if you are both moving into a time of your life that could turn out to be bittersweet. Unfortunately, you may not like my advice. I know you hope the two of you will be able to stay together despite the distance his move has created, but I must warn you: long-distance relationships are hard (as you know) and often don’t work out. All it takes is a little time and space and then you meet someone new and the old relationship seems like not much more than a memory …


I’m not saying it WON’T work out between the two of you. I’m just giving you a dose of reality. I firmly believe that if it’s meant to be then it will be and, instead of wasting your time crying, you should adopt the same belief – I’m positive it will give you more hope, no matter what the future brings.


Here’s the other thing. You and Austin are so lucky to live in a world of incredible communication technology – there’s no reason you can’t be in touch with each other even when you’re physically apart! I know nothing can replace actually being together in person, but you and Austin have all this technology in front of you. You can do video chat, talk on Skype for free, text 20 times a day (though I don't recommend it) or send long e-mails. While the odds are very much against this type of relationship, I've heard enough interesting stories in my life to realize that odds are just that — odds.


If you've got a burning question, need some love advice or find yourself thinking about things like sex, depression, self-esteem, boyfriends, girlfriends, best friends, bullying or peer pressure, don't hesitate to Dish-It here. Send your questions to deardish@kidzworld.com. And if you hang out in the chat rooms with other Kidzworld members who know you by your username, just send in your secret question using a different nickname if you want to stay anonymous – we promise that no one will ever know it's you. Remember: Dish-It gets a load of letters every day so it may take a while to reply to yours. Keep checking back for her reply, or watch for answered Dish-It questions that are similar to your own.


More Dish-It Advice:

  • My Parents Made Us Break Up
  • How Do I Get Over Being Cheated On?
  • How Do I Ask?
  • Am I In Love?
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    Dear Dish-It In The Forums

    EndlessDream
    EndlessDream posted in Style:
    You need breakfast and lunch. Starving yourself, even if you aren't hungry, makes you loose energy to the point you could pass out from not eating. Keep your diet healthy. For breakfast, at least have yogurt, fruit, and juice. Drink at least 4 full glasses of water a day. Trim down on the snacks. Everyone has different bodies and build. You may just be large-boned. And that's not bad! That makes you stronger and higher ability to gain muscle. Loosing weight doesn't happen over night. It can take months. 
    reply about 7 hours
    Nekogirl101
    Nekogirl101 posted in Style:
    For years my parents would tell me I'm skinny but compared to other people, my waist was bigger and I would always hide it. Though it was obvious I weighed more, I've only been doing this for a week and I didn't ever tell anyone what I was doing until my parents found out. I would skip lunch and breakfast and say I was full. I only ate a big dinner every night. Once my parents found out, they said it was unhealthy and if I didn't  stop, I would develop an eating disorder. I obviously listened to them, but I've tried as best as I can so far. I have barely lost any weight from exercise and my parents won't let me go on a diet because I already 'eat healthy enough'. I want to lose weight without exercising being 3/4s of my lifestyle. I know, I'm a lazy idiot for saying all this.
    reply about 8 hours
    rainbowpoptart
    Yes, purely for the fact that you should not "hate" your sister (or anyone, for that matter).  I'm guessing by "get in trouble for her", you mean she does something wrong and the blame is all put on you? Yeah, little siblings tend to do that a lot. My brother did for the longest time, until my parents found out how much a liar he is. She, hopefully, will grow out of this eventually. Either that, or your parent[s]/guardian[s] will eventually see through her. You lose your friends to her? By this do you mean your friends want to hang out with her and they want you to tag along and you don't? Or do you mean your friends chose your sister over you? If it's the latter, then perhaps you shouldn't have ever referred to those people as friends. You'll find friends who'll prefer you over your sister, I'm sure of it. The only thing I can tell you to do is try to get along with your sister. Every group of siblings has their cats and dogs moment in life, but they grow out of it (most of the time; there are, of course, circumstances where it doesn't work out that way). Please be grateful for your sister, even if you two fight a lot. You never know how much you need something until it's gone.
    reply 1 day
    liddielover
    i hate my little sister because i get introuble for her and lose my friends to her.is that wrong?
    reply 1 day
    skylar245
    skylar245 posted in Friends:
    "rainbowpoptart" wrote: "skylar245" wrote: Teacher said to wait for the Bus Driver and the counselor, she just talks to me and doesn't tell The Princible Then maybe try telling the principal yourself, and you should also report that the driver, teacher, and counselor haven't done anything to help you. If that fails, tell another trusted adult, like your mother. I'm sure someone you're close to would do their best to get justice. This is a major problem and it's a shame no one's done anything to help. ​No one listens to me anyway but my friends
    reply 3 days