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Dear Dish-It, I Want to Sleep With Him

Dear Dish-It gives advice on teen sex, boys, boyfriends, girls, girlfriends and crushes.
Dear Dish-It Advice on Sex

Dear Dish-It,

I want to sleep with this kid I believe I am in love with but I am scared. I am 14 and he is 17. I have known this kid for a year. We have been friends through thick and thin and we have gotten intimate. I really like him...I LOVE HIM! We have never gone out (been girlfriend and boyfriend) but he has always said he loves me and he has always been there for me. I want to sleep with him but then again I am scared! I really am not doing it for him. I want to do it! Should I go ahead and do it? How should I approach him and tell him I want to sleep with him? I am mostly afraid of gettin' pregnant. I can't get on birth control and condoms don't always work. My life would be OVER if I got pregnant....HELP PLEASE!
SwEeTnSeXcNaNa


Dear SwEeTnSeXcNaNa,

You're scared? Good. You should be. Having sex is a BIG deal. Seriously. It will change your life. It's good that you are worried about getting pregnant, but you should also be worried about STDs (Sexually Transmitted Diseases.) They can really make "your life OVER" - as in death. And you're right, condoms are not 100 percent safe... just so you know - no birth control method is 100 percent safe. So, you're putting yourself at risk for a possible pregnancy or STD anytime you have sex. Using birth control pills and condoms only reduces the risk, it doesn't take it away.


I think you need to chill. I'm glad you found a guy that you like and who is there for you when you need someone, but I don't think that you should have sex with him right away. You're 14 and he's 17 and that's a pretty big age gap right now... in some states it is even illegal for him to have sex with you. And besides, you sound a little too wigged-out. You'll probably always be a little scared the first time you have sex with someone, but you're too scared right now - it means you aren't ready. And why can't you get on birth control? Are you too scared to go to a doctor or a clinic? If you can't talk about it with a doctor and take the right precautions because you are too embarassed or shy or scared, you aren't ready.


Dear Dish-It,

My boyfriend's mom called to tell me not to have sex with her son. I'm not like that!!!
briansangel5


Dear briansangel5,

Well, are you having sex with her son? I'm not sure by what you mean when you say "I'm not like that!" You aren't the type to have sex with her son - or you aren't the type to stop having sex with her son just cuz she asked you to? I am gonna go out on a limb here and guess that you aren't the type to have sex with her son. If that's the case - then you need to tell Mrs. BF Mom that you aren't - and you wouldn't. It's okay to be a little offended by her assuming that you are "that type." Let her know you're kinda irked too. I mean, it's a little freaky that the mom would call you up and freak on ya. But... have you given her reason to think you two have had sex? And talk to the BF - find out wassup on his side.


Dear Dish-It,

Hey, I'm new here and I was wondering if you think this guy likes me? He tells me that my hair smells good every day and that my eyes are pretty. He goes around school singing "Hey you know you're soo fine!" We have been friends for a while and he just started acting like this. But, he is also the kind of guy to play jokes and I help him with his homework. I really need to know what you think. Thanks!
dancingdiva89


Dear Dancingdiva89,

What do you need - a neon sign? LOL! I'm kidding girlfriend, but seriously - where I stand the signs are pretty clear. This dude likes you. He may be a jokester, but I got a feeling that this isn't meant to be funny. Where's the punch line in telling you your hair smells good or your eyes are pretty? There isn't one - he just digs ya. So why not give him a compliment back next time? Tell him you like his shirt or his shoes or something. And while you're helping him with his homework take a break and chat him up. Talk about his hobbies, his interests, yours... you know - get the ball rolling! If you have something in common, then maybe you can hang together. This sounds like a definite love match to me. Good luck!


So, ya gotta burnin' question? Need some love directions? Thinkin' 'bout stuff like depression, sex,how ya feel 'bout YOURSELF (that's called "self-esteem"), boyfriends, girlfriends, losin' old friends, bullyin' or peer pressure, but too scared to ask the parents? Don't be scared to .

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Sex and Love - Are they Different?

  • Sex is physical. Having sex isn't saying I love you.
  • Having sex is saying you love someone.
  • Forget about love - I just wanna know what sex feels like.
  • I'm too young to have sex.

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Dear Dish-It in the forums

Dear Dish-It
Dear Dish-It posted in Friends:
Hi there! My most important advice would be to be yourself! live your life! do the things you want to do. If you've moved past what happened with your feelings for one another, just go and enjoy your time. If things are weird, it'll be because of her, not you. Stay positive and calm and I'm sure you'll have fun!   Hope you have a good time!
reply about 6 hours
cargirl296
cargirl296 posted in Style:
I think that rubber band bracelets are totally in right now. And they are easy to make on a loom! Head scarves are also in as well. Hope you found this helpful!
reply about 9 hours
Dear Dish-It
Wow! This sounds so frustrating! Maybe talk to your mom about what's going on. Ask her why she's doing it. She might just be worried about your safety online. More and more there are unsafe people talking to kids on the internet. I'm sure your mom just has your best interest at heart. See if you two can agree on how to keep you safe online!   Good luck!
reply about 9 hours
Bloody Wings
Bloody Wings posted in Friends:
ignore her be the cool kind of guy dont talk to her even if she comes and talk with you. well thats my opinion
reply about 13 hours
FloraTheWolf
FloraTheWolf posted in Friends:
One thing that I have noticed is that a lot of people seem to think they should have a boyfriend or a girlfriend as soon as possible, but they don't need to until its the right time just for them. You don't have to be forced to fall in love with someone if you don't want to. Let love come in its own time. And to keep away from any problems with her if she may become mean, try just forgetting about what happened and treat her like a normal person you know, and try to avoid any arguments. If she becomes mean, maybe just walk away for a bit. And if she is still being mean, maybe confront her asking what you have ever done to make her this way towards you. If you have done nothing, then she will have no reason to be mad at you so its not your problem she is being mean so you don't have to be stressed about it. I hope this helps! :)
reply about 13 hours

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