Dear Dish-It: Bogus BF

Dear Dish-it,

I have a boyfriend, but he totally pretends we aren't dating! He asks me not to lean against him and I think he's embarrassed of me. All my friends tease us but it doesn't seem to bother him. What do I do?

Unhappy Girlfriend

Dear Unhappy Girlfriend,

Uh-oh. Your situation sounds sad. When you're in a good relationship with someone who cares about you, then there's no reason to hide it from the world! I wonder why your boyfriend pretends that the two of you aren't dating? Hmm...there could be several reasons, which we can definitely talk about, but, at the end of the day, I think it's pretty unfair and sorta hurtful that he acts like you're not his girlfriend...

Easily Embarrassed

You mentioned that you think your BF is embarrassed of you...well, I think you may be onto something, but I sure hope it's not YOU that he's embarrassed by. If it is, then I don't think he's a very nice guy and you probably should lose him and move on to someone who isn't embarrassed to be with you. But maybe it's more that he just gets embarrassed really easily? If he's the kind of guy who gets really red in the face when he's the center of attention, or if his friends make a lot of fun of him because he has a girlfriend, then he could just be pretending he's not in a relationship with you because he wants to avoid being teased by others.

Is He Immature?

Are you sure your boyfriend is mature enough to have a girlfriend? If he's still sort of immature, he might not be ready. And, if that's the case, what seems to you like him pretending he doesn't know you or that he's embarrassed by you may actually be a signal that he needs some more time to grow up or feel ready to be in a relationship with a girl.

Time to Talk

The bottom line is, you'll never really know why your boyfriend is acting the way he is until you ask him. I think it's definitely important to sit down with him (in private), and ask him why he acts like he doesn't know you or why he gets so embarrassed about your relationship. If his reasons are legit, then try to understand where he's coming from and see if you can work it out. But if he denies doing it and it seems like, after you talk, nothing is going to change, then it may be time for you to move on. If you really feel like you're an "Unhappy Girlfriend," then it's up to you to change that!

Sound Off

What do you think Unhappy Girlfriend should do? Have your say by leaving a comment below this story!

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Dear Dish-It in the forums

Delancy posted in Friends:
Calm down. Ignore her. You are YOU, don't let anyone change you. If someone hurts, cry a river and build a bridge over it cx
reply 1 day
hello dish-it i hope i not bothering rita im 16 year old and i have autism.i get bullyed a lot. this has been happening online.this girl said that i was crazy and that freddie mercury (queen lead singer) wouldnt love me cause i have autism.i am queen and freddie mercury's #1 fan.the girl said no body would believe me and it made me so upset i had a autistic meltdown.what do i do,please help.  
reply 1 day
EndlessDream posted in Friends:
Hmmm....Then she mustn't be necessarily "using" you, if she is not getting something in return ( As far as we know of). However, It does sound like she is being extremely unfair. That just might be how she is. Not exactly loyal to anyone. Well, try to talk to her about it and tell her how you feel. And, if it doesn't work out, then she might not be a great friend to hang around with, and maybe you will find someone else who enjoys your company. I hope this helps, and good luck :)
reply 3 days
XxIHateMathxX posted in Friends:
No not really. Like I said, one minute she's all smiley and then she doesn't even look at me. Most of the time I see her with Daniela and Andrea. Today she was asking me if I was going to hang out with her, Daniela, Andrea and Luisa during recess. When I told her that I was 'going to have to think' she was like, "Whatever." and ran off to catch up with the Threesome. Thanks. :)
reply 3 days
EndlessDream posted in Friends:
Is she asking you to do things for her? Like help with homework, carry her books and so on?
reply 3 days

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