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Dear Dish-It: Bogus BF

Dear Dish-it,


I have a boyfriend, but he totally pretends we aren't dating! He asks me not to lean against him and I think he's embarrassed of me. All my friends tease us but it doesn't seem to bother him. What do I do?


Unhappy Girlfriend



Dear Unhappy Girlfriend,

Uh-oh. Your situation sounds sad. When you're in a good relationship with someone who cares about you, then there's no reason to hide it from the world! I wonder why your boyfriend pretends that the two of you aren't dating? Hmm...there could be several reasons, which we can definitely talk about, but, at the end of the day, I think it's pretty unfair and sorta hurtful that he acts like you're not his girlfriend...

Easily Embarrassed

You mentioned that you think your BF is embarrassed of you...well, I think you may be onto something, but I sure hope it's not YOU that he's embarrassed by. If it is, then I don't think he's a very nice guy and you probably should lose him and move on to someone who isn't embarrassed to be with you. But maybe it's more that he just gets embarrassed really easily? If he's the kind of guy who gets really red in the face when he's the center of attention, or if his friends make a lot of fun of him because he has a girlfriend, then he could just be pretending he's not in a relationship with you because he wants to avoid being teased by others.

Is He Immature?

Are you sure your boyfriend is mature enough to have a girlfriend? If he's still sort of immature, he might not be ready. And, if that's the case, what seems to you like him pretending he doesn't know you or that he's embarrassed by you may actually be a signal that he needs some more time to grow up or feel ready to be in a relationship with a girl.

Time to Talk

The bottom line is, you'll never really know why your boyfriend is acting the way he is until you ask him. I think it's definitely important to sit down with him (in private), and ask him why he acts like he doesn't know you or why he gets so embarrassed about your relationship. If his reasons are legit, then try to understand where he's coming from and see if you can work it out. But if he denies doing it and it seems like, after you talk, nothing is going to change, then it may be time for you to move on. If you really feel like you're an "Unhappy Girlfriend," then it's up to you to change that!

Sound Off

What do you think Unhappy Girlfriend should do? Have your say by leaving a comment below this story!


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Comments

Never-Shout-Alexa!
I feel ya girly :(
commented: Mon Dec 31, 2012

beautifulme40

beautifulme40 wrote:

I would dump him if i was u from wat u explainedbhe doesnt relly lik u
commented: Sat Aug 25, 2012

the real tab time
cool
commented: Mon Aug 06, 2012

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Dear Dish-It in the forums

jordand08
jordand08 posted in Friends:
"-Karpov-" wrote:I think jealousy would be if she were angry at you for being considered better than her. It sounds more like she's just disappointed, but it's impossible for you to know if you don't ask.  I agree here.
reply about 11 hours
-Karpov-
-Karpov- posted in Friends:
I think jealousy would be if she were angry at you for being considered better than her. It sounds more like she's just disappointed, but it's impossible for you to know if you don't ask. 
reply about 11 hours
B-who-u-r-and-SING
My best friend and I were really close before and hung out all the time, we were both in musicals and both got smaller parts, and if one of us got a bigger part, it was her. Then she took voice lessons with an amazing voice teacher and got a little better, she took lessons for about two weeks and then I decided to take lessons too. After about three weeks people were saying that I was an amazing singer and all of the sudden my maybe-best-friend hardly talks to me. She always seems really sad. (Keep in mind that my friend can't sing well) I don't know if she is jealous or what, and please don't think that i'm conceited by thinking she might be jealous I am just wondering. Please help!
reply about 11 hours
kaykay2002
"CocoC01" wrote: Sometimes things are n`t fair in life. Maybe you can try to find your cousin`s weakness or try your best to get along with her. After all, your cousin is still young. Grandparents tend to show more love to the younger ones because they are young and innocent.You`re 11 now, your grandmother might think that you`re more mature than your cousin: able to do whatever you want, able to make the right decision. Try to impress your grandmother with something that you`re good at ( I mean in the positive way) like joining debate/dancing/singing competitions--> try your best to achieve something and make them proud of you.   thanks but even when I was 5 6 and 7 she played favorites. I almost always get along with my cousin but sometimes I burst. my grandma always somehow finds out what I want and gives it my cousin and if my parents are around she treats us equally and that is another thing that makes me mad is she acts like the best grandma in front of my parents but the second they are gone she is a different person
reply about 13 hours
CocoC01
CocoC01 posted in Family Issues:
Sometimes things are n`t fair in life. Maybe you can try to find your cousin`s weakness or try your best to get along with her. After all, your cousin is still young. Grandparents tend to show more love to the younger ones because they are young and innocent.You`re 11 now, your grandmother might think that you`re more mature than your cousin: able to do whatever you want, able to make the right decision. Try to impress your grandmother with something that you`re good at ( I mean in the positive way) like joining debate/dancing/singing competitions--> try your best to achieve something and make them proud of you.
reply about 14 hours

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