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Dear Dish-It: Bogus BF

Oct 31, 2010

Dear Dish-it,


I have a boyfriend, but he totally pretends we aren't dating! He asks me not to lean against him and I think he's embarrassed of me. All my friends tease us but it doesn't seem to bother him. What do I do?


Unhappy Girlfriend



Dear Unhappy Girlfriend,

Uh-oh. Your situation sounds sad. When you're in a good relationship with someone who cares about you, then there's no reason to hide it from the world! I wonder why your boyfriend pretends that the two of you aren't dating? Hmm...there could be several reasons, which we can definitely talk about, but, at the end of the day, I think it's pretty unfair and sorta hurtful that he acts like you're not his girlfriend...

Easily Embarrassed

You mentioned that you think your BF is embarrassed of you...well, I think you may be onto something, but I sure hope it's not YOU that he's embarrassed by. If it is, then I don't think he's a very nice guy and you probably should lose him and move on to someone who isn't embarrassed to be with you. But maybe it's more that he just gets embarrassed really easily? If he's the kind of guy who gets really red in the face when he's the center of attention, or if his friends make a lot of fun of him because he has a girlfriend, then he could just be pretending he's not in a relationship with you because he wants to avoid being teased by others.

Is He Immature?

Are you sure your boyfriend is mature enough to have a girlfriend? If he's still sort of immature, he might not be ready. And, if that's the case, what seems to you like him pretending he doesn't know you or that he's embarrassed by you may actually be a signal that he needs some more time to grow up or feel ready to be in a relationship with a girl.

Time to Talk

The bottom line is, you'll never really know why your boyfriend is acting the way he is until you ask him. I think it's definitely important to sit down with him (in private), and ask him why he acts like he doesn't know you or why he gets so embarrassed about your relationship. If his reasons are legit, then try to understand where he's coming from and see if you can work it out. But if he denies doing it and it seems like, after you talk, nothing is going to change, then it may be time for you to move on. If you really feel like you're an "Unhappy Girlfriend," then it's up to you to change that!

Sound Off

What do you think Unhappy Girlfriend should do? Have your say by leaving a comment below this story!


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