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Dear Dish-It: I’m Secretly Depressed

Dear Dish-it,

I’m depressed but nobody knows. I act like a crazy, fun, happy girl,but under all that I’m sad and lonely...I can’t keep lying to my friends when I’m in the bathroom stall crying. Should I wait until it goes away or should I tell them…and how?

Leah123

Dealing With DepressionDealing With Depression

Dear Leah123,

I know just how you feel. I’ve felt down a lot of times, too, and it’s been hard keeping my feelings hidden from everyone around me. But what’s even harder, I think, is dealing with the blues yourself when you’re not even sure why it’s happening!

You’re Not Alone

First thing’s first: you’re not alone in how you feel. Depression is really common, affecting about 1 in 8 teens. It also seems to affect more girls than guys. No one really knows what causes depression. It may have to do with your genes (if your mom or dad suffers from depression, you may be more likely to get the blues than some of your friends), something bad that happens in your life (like moving or changing schools), being stressed out – sometimes depression is even caused by a medical condition.

Depression vs. Sadness

It’s important, also, to understand the difference betwee depression and regular sadness. Everyone has their ups and down – sadness is a totally natural emotion. Things like arguing with friends, breaking up with your boyfriend, getting a bad mark on a test or having to deal with your best friend moving away can all make you feel sad, hurt or disappointed. But it usually doesn’t last very long and you eventually feel better.

Depression is more than feeling down in the dumps every so often. It’s a strong mood that lasts for weeks, months or even longer and it gets in the way of your normal life. You may feel more tired or you may not be motivated to do the things you normally like to do. It may even make you pull away from the people around you – but this will only make you feel more lonely, making the depression worse.

Getting Help

Now for some good news: depression is totally treatable! About 80% of people who get help for their depression end up feeling much better than they did before! The best way to get help is to talk to your parents or some other adult that you trust (a close family friend, your fave aunt, a school counselor or your family doctor) about how you’ve been feeling. While your friends definitely care about you and will be there for you if you need them, they won’t be able to explain why you’re feeling like you do and they won’t be able to find a solution that will help you. An adult may be better able to help you figure out what’s happening inside your head, and find a way to make it better.

Types of Treatment

While there are prescription medications out there for depression (only your family doctor can decide whether you need to try any of these, and he or she will then write you a prescription), it doesn’t even have to be about that. Sometimes just talking about your life and feelings with a counselor or a therapist once a week or so can help a lot! Other things have also been shown to make depression better: exercising, getting outside more, painting, changing the way you eat are all thing that can help to change your mood!

Don’t Wait

One thing’s for sure: you shouldn't wait and hope your feeling of sadness and depression will just go away on their own. After you talk to an adult and get the help you need, you may feel more confident about letting your friends in on your feelings, or you may not even feel the need to explain anything to them because you’ll likely be feeling better than you did before!

Have Your Say

What do you think Leah123 should do? Do you know how she feels and have some advice for her? Leave your comment below!

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How Do You Deal With Depression?

  • I hole up in my room and listen to angry music.
  • I fill my face with Chunky Monkey ice cream.
  • I get all my frustration out on paper by writing poetry.
  • I'm never depressed.

Dear Dish-It In The Forums

vwala_12
vwala_12 posted in Friends:
I guess I mean I have been in a lot of drama since the school year started I also recommend if the bullying gets worst tell someone and don’t just walk away it will be worst if you do and if there gonna beat you up just run and tell a teacher or tell your parent so always keep alert!
reply 16 minutes
SnowAngel15
SnowAngel15 posted in Friends:
Monday-Friday, I have to deal with this girl, now none of you know me, so you can't really say I don't do this, but I'll just say it anyway, I don't like being mean, and I HATE talking bad about people I rarely ever do it, but this is just something I can't even fathom. Two of my best friends just got hurt because of her. You'd think that being in an ONLINE SCHOOL this would never happen but it did and it did not go well. I'm a straight A student, I'm a sophomore and I take both 10th grade and 11th grade courses, I'm also doing Advanced Honors and next year I hope to be able to do college courses AND high school courses, anyway. This girl joined our school last year she acts cool like she does all this stuff and every guy falls for it but I've thrown little tests here and there and she's even admitted to me that most of the things she claims to do are lies. She always bullies my friends and I get involved but then my other classmates try to say "You're being mean to her leave her alone!" I of course don't care if she's mean to me but my friends are off limits. So then she starts asking me for help with her school because  I help other students in my free time she was refusing to listen and didn't do well on the quiz and she tells me "I THOUGHT you were supposed to help!?" So she kept asking me for help now I love my teachers and respect them she asked one of them to come into the room because she refused to listen to me, and I was polite and nice like usual and she said "You sure do like your teachers." I called her on it and she was shocked I did. Then I was helping two of my best friends. They are friends with her but I don't get involved, now this girl let's call her Maggie likes the guy let's call him John. John liked her and told me to tell Maggie and I did they were about to get together when this girl the bully begged him to date her instead. He said yes, now this bully has a new boyfriend every other week, and he started being mean to Maggie after he started dating the bully. She just dumped him when he tried to come back into Maggie's life I started snapping him out and being very crude towards him. Is what I did right?
reply about 4 hours
vwala_12
vwala_12 posted in Family Issues:
They mean what does there family think about them
reply 1 day
vwala_12
vwala_12 posted in Family Issues:
I think you come out great even though I don’t have any you do you and people will love your personali
reply 1 day
NightSpoon
Okay lots of fandoms out there going up to these forum posts above but, tell your family plenty of nice things out there with the fandom you're in. If they don't like it, its their lost. Their opinion is their lost woopdedoo. But if they're all disgusted and trying to force you to """""live like a normal being"""""(Realize everyone's different and I doubt this would happen), dont mind to them. You be you. Whatever makes you happy and joyful about something.
reply 1 day