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Dear Dish-It: I’m Secretly Depressed

Dear Dish-it,

I’m depressed but nobody knows. I act like a crazy, fun, happy girl,but under all that I’m sad and lonely...I can’t keep lying to my friends when I’m in the bathroom stall crying. Should I wait until it goes away or should I tell them…and how?

Leah123

DepressionDealing With Depression

Dear Leah123,

I know just how you feel. I’ve felt down a lot of times, too, and it’s been hard keeping my feelings hidden from everyone around me. But what’s even harder, I think, is dealing with the blues yourself when you’re not even sure why it’s happening!

You’re Not Alone

First thing’s first: you’re not alone in how you feel. Depression is really common, affecting about 1 in 8 teens. It also seems to affect more girls than guys. No one really knows what causes depression. It may have to do with your genes (if your mom or dad suffers from depression, you may be more likely to get the blues than some of your friends), something bad that happens in your life (like moving or changing schools), being stressed out – sometimes depression is even caused by a medical condition.

Depression vs. Sadness

It’s important, also, to understand the difference betwee depression and regular sadness. Everyone has their ups and down – sadness is a totally natural emotion. Things like arguing with friends, breaking up with your boyfriend, getting a bad mark on a test or having to deal with your best friend moving away can all make you feel sad, hurt or disappointed. But it usually doesn’t last very long and you eventually feel better.

Depression is more than feeling down in the dumps every so often. It’s a strong mood that lasts for weeks, months or even longer and it gets in the way of your normal life. You may feel more tired or you may not be motivated to do the things you normally like to do. It may even make you pull away from the people around you – but this will only make you feel more lonely, making the depression worse.

Getting Help

Now for some good news: depression is totally treatable! About 80% of people who get help for their depression end up feeling much better than they did before! The best way to get help is to talk to your parents or some other adult that you trust (a close family friend, your fave aunt, a school counselor or your family doctor) about how you’ve been feeling. While your friends definitely care about you and will be there for you if you need them, they won’t be able to explain why you’re feeling like you do and they won’t be able to find a solution that will help you. An adult may be better able to help you figure out what’s happening inside your head, and find a way to make it better.

Types of Treatment

While there are prescription medications out there for depression (only your family doctor can decide whether you need to try any of these, and he or she will then write you a prescription), it doesn’t even have to be about that. Sometimes just talking about your life and feelings with a counselor or a therapist once a week or so can help a lot! Other things have also been shown to make depression better: exercising, getting outside more, painting, changing the way you eat are all thing that can help to change your mood!

Don’t Wait

One thing’s for sure: you shouldn't wait and hope your feeling of sadness and depression will just go away on their own. After you talk to an adult and get the help you need, you may feel more confident about letting your friends in on your feelings, or you may not even feel the need to explain anything to them because you’ll likely be feeling better than you did before!

Have Your Say

What do you think Leah123 should do? Do you know how she feels and have some advice for her? Leave your comment below!

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How Do You Deal With Depression?

  • I hole up in my room and listen to angry music.
  • I fill my face with Chunky Monkey ice cream.
  • I get all my frustration out on paper by writing poetry.
  • I'm never depressed.

Dear Dish-It In The Forums

ShySleepySky
ShySleepySky posted in Style:
It's important to think about why you are wanting to wear the makeup. If you are wanting it to impress someone, then chances are makeup is not the solution. When you are in middle school the need to impress escalates greatly. You do not always need to impress people with your looks. Impress them with your mind, blow them away with how good you are in a certain topic or how fast you read your assigned readings. Being pretty is something everyone strives to be, but how about being pretty smart, pretty funny, pretty kind, pretty helpful. There's all kinds of pretty. Now, if you are doing your makeup because it's fun and something you enjoy doing then by all means do it. Makeup can be an art, no matter what people say. I have many friends who's general art skills have increased because they can do their winged eyeliner perfectly, or their contour is just right. The point to all this is simple. Do the makeup for you, not for others. Please talk to your mom respectively about the topic and see if she changes her mind, and please do not be discouraged if she doesn't.  I hope this helps. 
reply about 4 hours
blackveilbrides15
yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
reply about 12 hours
BestiesFesties
BestiesFesties posted in Style:
that's right sis great words xx
reply about 13 hours
IndigoTiger19
IndigoTiger19 posted in Style:
dont need it too pretty for it :)
reply about 14 hours
H3LLSCRIVVER
H3LLSCRIVVER posted in Friends:
Thank u
reply about 16 hours