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Dear Dish-It: My Crush Has a Broken Heart

November 16, 2012

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Dear Dish-It,

There is this guy in my class who I like and I think he likes me back, but I’m not sure if he’ll ask me out. His last girlfriend broke up with him and he was pretty devastated. I think he is scared to ask me out because he’s afraid I’ll reject him. Should I talk to him about it and try to make him feel better or convince him that I wouldn't do that to him?

Confused Lover

Dear Confused Lover,

When a guy gets his heart broken, it can take him a while to heal. If his last relationship ended recently you may need to give it some time. You don’t want to wind up as the rebound girl. Those relationships rarely work out. But if you really like this guy, don’t disappear off his radar either. You don’t want another girl swooping in for the kill while you’re giving him space.

To Chase or Not To Chase

You can still hang out with him but make sure you don’t wind up in the friend zone. Flirt, girl, flirt! If he seems like he’s had enough time to heal his broken heart, then try to figure out what type of guy he is. Some guys like the chase, some like to be chased. Look back at his last relationship? Who did the pursuing? Him or his ex? If he likes the chase, then flirt, show confidence (guys like that), and let him come to you. If he likes to be chased, then tell him how you feel.

Your Feelings May Change

I suggest not trying to convince him that you wouldn’t break his heart. That puts you in a very difficult position if you do start dating him and then realize that he’s not the guy for you. Ultimately, you have to do what’s best for you, even if he does get hurt again. Break ups and heartbreaks are a part of life that everyone faces at some point. But they exist to help us to learn and grow and become stronger people. 

Have Your Say

Do you have any advice for Confused Lover? Leave your comment below!

 

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