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Dear Dish-It: My Best Friend's An Attention Seeker

Nov 23, 2012

Dear Dish-It,

Ever since boys started noticing my best friend, she’s been such an attention seeker. She tries to act overly confident and wears revealing clothes. One minute she’ll be my friend, and as soon as there are boys around, it’s like I don’t even exist. I try to talk to her and she only pretends to listen while looking over my head at the boys behind me. It’s hard to be around her because she’s always trying to compete with me. What should I do?

Overlooked

Dear Overlooked,

As much as your best friend tries to appear confident, the act of attention seeking usually stems from a lack of confidence. If she was truly confident in who she is, your best friend wouldn’t need to act differently when boys are around or wear revealing clothes just to get them to notice her.

Tell Her How You Feel

If you haven’t already, you should try talking to your friend about your feelings. Don’t accuse her of anything; that will only make her defensive and probably start a fight. Just tell her that you feel like she ignores you when there are boys around, and that it makes you upset.

Friendship is More Important

The only way for your friendship to truly work is for you to support each other. That means letting each other have your moment instead of competing for the spotlight. You don’t want to wind up as frenemies. You’ll have a long lasting friendship if you both understand that your relationship is more important than boys.

Have Your Say

Do you have any advice for Overlooked? Leave your comment below!

 

97 Comments

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What's Sure to Get His Attention?

  • Smile and giggle at all his jokes.
  • The bend-and-snap technique from Legally Blonde.
  • Follow him home from school every day - even though you live on the other side of town.
  • What's with the games? Just ask him out and stop playin' around already!

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Dear Dish-It in the forums

hugebear
hugebear posted in Family Issues:
You doesnt have to come out to your family until your ready and until they is ready too.  If you blurt it out it could be the shock.  You says that you think your Mums side of the family will be more supportive.  Has you got an Aunty or Uncle what you could discuss this with?  An adult member of your family what is most likely supportive  could probably give the best advises on how to tell your family and when and how and prepares you for how they will react. Good luck mate and takes your time :angel
reply about 3 hours
Mrawsomegamer
I think my mothers side of the family would be fine with it. It's my dad's side I'm most concerned about. My dad says some dreadfully terrible remarks about homosexual people. I think I'm not gunna tell him at all. Ever...  Either way. Thanks for the advice!
reply about 3 hours
Kirsteeeeen
If you don't think that you'll be in a safe situation (for example, your parents try to kick you out, or hurt you physically or emotionally) than you should definitely wait to tell them. I think you'll know when the time is right. We can't tell you how they'll react, but I bet you can sort of figure it out from how they feel and act about these topics.  Remember, you are not obligated to tell anybody at all. It's personal. Wait until you're for sure ready to tell them. And when you do, tell them the way in which it's easiest. Get your point across, offer resources, reassurance, and give them time. 
reply about 3 hours
Mrawsomegamer
Hey guys, so I do kinda have a personal issue, but I need to tell my family about it. Truth is, I'm not even sure how they'll even react. Very few of my friends know, only the ones I trust anyway... I'm gay. Or at least bisexual. I kinda had a thing for girls, but that was a long time ago. I think I'm fully gay. I have a very supportive boyfriend, who loves me with all his heart. But that's not what it's about; it's actually coming out to my family, whom I know some of them are quite homophobic. Homophobia runs in my family. Sorta...  It makes my stomach turn when I think about it. I sometimes look into the mirror, look at myself and think if my conscience suddenly made me decide I was gay, or if I was born with it. Science tells us that we are born that way, due to lack of man chemicals entering a boys brain when in development. I feel like I've chosen it (even though I know deep inside I haven't) to be gay, probably because of my family almost forcing me into getting a girlfriend and such. I come from a Catholic family, to make things even worse. I'm like the only practising person in my family, but somehow I feel that they'll use my Faith against me if I come out.  So, should I just wait until I'm older? How do I know when the time is right? How will they even react? How should I even say it?  Please help!
reply about 4 hours
Kirsteeeeen
Kirsteeeeen posted in Friends:
This thread has been moved. Click here to see the new thread.
reply about 5 hours

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