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Dear Dish-It, My Mom's an Attention Seeker


Dear Dish-It, is here to whisper "ttyl after I've thought about this some more".


Dear Dish-It,

My mom is a bit... odd when it comes to men. She dates a lot, and has gotten pregnant three times from three different guys - the results being me, my sister, and brother - or perhaps I should say half-sister and half-brother. I've never met my dad, my parents broke up when mom was still pregnant, and apparently by the time I was born she had another boyfriend. I don't really get to see my sister because her dad took her and moved all the way across the state. When my mom's single, she's really depressed. She'll grab the nearest person and chew their ear off about how she MUST be ugly and stupid if no guys are dating her and starts going on about how maybe this is someone's way of telling her she shouldn't be living. My grandmom and I try to talk to her, snap her out of it, but it never changes until she finds another guy (which tends to be after a week or two of whining) or gets back with a previous one. I love my mother dearly, but her depression bouts seem rather attention-seeky. What should I do? Is there anything I CAN do? If not, I at least feel kinda better that I could tell this to somebody. It's not like I'm suicidal over it or anything, but it's all so annoying!
IrkenWaffle


Dear IrkenWaffle,

Props to you for being very mature about this difficult situation. Your mom is definitely not being a very positive role model for you by putting men and her love life ahead of your happiness and safety. Not only do her actions affect your day-to-day life, they also affect how you must view love and relationships. It's important to remember, despite the example that your mom is giving you, that you do not need a guy in your life to make you happy or feel special. Love is great, but just being with someone for the sake of having someone there isn't good. It ends up making you feel worse about yourself, not better. There's not a whole lot you can do to make your mom change her ways. But you can tell her how you feel. It sounds like you are pretty close to your grandmother, so maybe you can talk to her about how you are feeling as well. There is not really an easy answer on how to remedy this situation, but maybe you can spend some time staying with your grandma while your mom sorts her messy love life out. Instead of worrying about hurting your mom's feelings, start putting your needs first. She is your mom and should be looking out for your well-being before hers or her boyfriends. I hope this has helped! Good luck.


So, ya gotta burnin' question? Need some love directions? Thinkin' 'bout stuff like depression, sex,how ya feel 'bout YOURSELF (that's called "self-esteem"), boyfriends, girlfriends, losin' old friends, bullyin' or peer pressure, but too scared to ask the parents? Don't be scared to .


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  • 8 Comments

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    Dear Dish-It in the forums

    hugebear
    hugebear posted in Friends:
    Im sorry that you has such friends that seems to enjoy entertaining themselves by being mean to you.  They is just people that you hangs out with cos you says you hasnt anyone else to hang out with.... not friends.  I doesnt think you should think of them as friends either and then its gonna be easier to move on. Is there any way you can hang out with other people by eg [what other posters said] taking up the new activities? And you has friends on KW :) :D
    reply about 5 hours
    -Gwen9--
    -Gwen9-- posted in Friends:
    If they call you fat and stupid, they are not your friends. Your so called 'friends' are just using you. You need to find your truest friends. Clearly, they are not your truest friends.
    reply about 5 hours
    PrincessAmelia
    PrincessAmelia posted in Style:
    Normally just a hairband or clips on the either side of my side divided hair.
    reply about 10 hours
    PrincessAmelia
    PrincessAmelia posted in Friends:
    Society will not be soft to you always, just because YOU are soft. You must have a strong background. Also they are not your friends. You know what they are doing to you?They are packing a gift box looking all attractive (friendship) and filled with hurt ...like Pandora's box.  Just move on. Be alone n discover more of the world. Or just make new friends.I was in a state like you some months back. Now I moved on n I have 3 best friends. That time I thought too that they r my only friends. You will not find the world until you set out for the world.
    reply about 10 hours
    disney princess
    They are not your friends, really. You should leave them and move on. This might sound difficult, but being alone is better than being with an untrue friend. You'll make better friends soon, anyway. Plus, WE are here for you! :D
    reply about 11 hours

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