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Ten Things to Help You Move Forward When You Lose a Friend

Sep 08, 2017

One of the hardest things we experience in life is losing a close friend. It can be so difficult because just because we have a falling out with someone it doesn’t mean we stop caring for them. For some of us we may never fully move on from this friend while others will be less affected. Some people are just done when they are done and they don’t look back, while others are more subjective to the topic and taker longer to move on. While some people never move on, forever missing that friend. Well, it could be said that if they were really a "friend" they would be in your life. 

A broken friendship can feel like a broken heart. A broken friendship can feel like a broken heart.

Here are ten things you can do to help you move on:

1. Talk to Someone

You have a lot of feeling on the matter, this will be natural, therefore it Is important that you reach out to someone that you can trust and talk about it. Talking things through can be really helpful. It can make you see the pros and cons of being friends with that person, and perhaps make you realize negative aspects of the friendship that you didn’t see before. Talking to someone can also provide a huge support and comfort.

2. Hang out with other friends/Make an effort with family time

We all come from different family homes and structures, but generally, families love us no matter what so being around them is a huge support, especially if you come from a supportive family--their encouragement will mean a lot. You might even feel comfortable talking to your parents about this and getting their take on the matter. They will be the ones to make you feel better just give them a chance.

Spend time with people who you do get along with, to keep your self-esteem up and to remind yourself that you are not alone—don’t be alone. Losing one friend doesn’t mean you lose them all. Don’t get consumed with your loss to the point where you let it hold you down. Though it is okay to grief and grief the loss of the this person in your life. You are allowed to feel whatever emotion that you may experience as this wont be an easy time. 

3. Make new friends

Maybe you and your friend weren’t meant to hit it off, but there was probably a lack of chemistry there. Other people might be more compatible with you so don’t be scared to give them a chance. Try new things, meet new people, branch out and see what it does for you. Your group or individual set of friends is waiting for you. 

4. Get Caught up in a Hobby

Throw yourself into something you love doing and excel at it. Put your energy in places it should be. Create something. Plan an event. Start a project. The sky is the limit for all the things you could get into. Even if it’s video games or skateboarding, get wrapped up in the thing you enjoy to do and don’t look back. The past is the past, you can’t do anything to change it. You can try, but until people are ready, it’s a waste of time and it's better to give them space.

Not all friendships were build to last.Not all friendships were build to last.

5. Do your Homework/Do Something You Love

Often doing things that we love will remind us why we love being here. We know it Is impossible to get along with everyone, but it would be nice if people knew that sometimes this is just not possible. Doing something you love will put you in a better head space.  Keep loving flowing in your life despite whether there is any hate. We can’t force people to want to hang out with us, and we have to accept when we are not a good mix for people.

It might sound silly, but distraction is key when we are having big problems and doing your homework might help you get your mind off things. Focus on something. Lose your mind on something in a good way and prosper off of the results. It will feel so good sitting in class knowing you have done your homework, and if called upon you will have the answer. This will make you feel good about yourself and will be good for your self-esteem.

6. Work to Resolve it

If people are meant to be in your life they will be no matter what so sometimes it’s just about timing. In time, maybe, you could work it out.

 If you have it in you to give it time. A lot of people are quick to say “see ya” and not look back. It is important to talk it out. Some people are really stubborn and when they are done they are done. Not everyone believes in second chances, which is unfortunate because there clearly was something there that brought you two together from the start.

Losing your best friend is the hardest thing.Losing your best friend is the hardest thing.

7. Be You and Never Stop Being You

You are still loveable just the way that you are. Never let anyone make you feel like you aren’t good enough. If it means learning a lesson then let it be known that you’ve learned it, but know you are worthy of love exactly for who you are. Maybe one person doesn’t want to hang out with you, but other people will. If people are trying to turn them against you, then that’s terrible. No one should experience the effects of group antics.

8. Learn from Your Mistakes

Try not to repeat the same mistake with friends. Try to learn from your mistakes. Let them help you grow. It is natural that we will make the same mistakes over and over, but with the hope that eventually we do learn. For example, if people are taking advantage of you and not really respecting your opinion, perhaps you’ll stick with those who do. Our friends really need to make us feel good about ourselves. They have to make us feel wanted, valued and included. People should acknowledge when someone has learned from a mistake and give them a second chance.

Sometimes you're not invited into the conversaton. Sometimes you're not invited into the conversaton.

9. Keep Your Head Up

Sadly people come and go from our lives throughout our lives. That’s why it’s important to focus on things like family and school—things we can depend on. It hard because friendships never stop being dear to our heart, but they do change over time, and your close friends will change a lot at this age. It’s key to strive for harmony and to treat others with respect, but it can be hard to make commitments at a young age. Regardless, friends should be loyal, have your back and not be afraid to like you just because someone else doesn’t. 

10. Don’t worry about it

Some people we just never forget and always wonder about, regardless of the friendship status. If we stop becoming friends, it doesn’t mean that you suddenly stop caring. The truth is, if someone is meant to be in your life they are going to be no matter what.

When you meet a good friend, you will just know it.When you meet a good friend, you will just know it.

As we age, evolve and mature we start to learn who is true.True best friends are, just don’t forget the most valuable friend, which is yourself. You have to learn to be your own best friend. 

Have your say

Have you ever lost a friend before? What helped you get over it? Comment below!

 

4 Comments

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Do Your Friends Annoy You?

  • Yeah, my friends annoy me all the time.
  • Sometimes my friends can get on my nerves.
  • No, me and my friends usually get along really well.
  • I don't really have friends to annoy me.

Dear Dish-It In The Forums

rainbowpoptart
Goodness... I see where your mother is coming from: if you eat too much, no matter how healthy the food is, and don't work off the calories, you're going to gain weight. But she's being very obsessive and dramatic about it. There is nothing wrong with eating pizza or a cookie every now and then, and there's nothing wrong with relaxing from time to time either. As long as you aren't constantly eating junk and not burning the calories, then you do not have a problem. Eating unhealthy things every now and then does not make you fat. EATING every now and then does not make you fat. Try explaining this to her, calmly and patiently. Tell her that you don't want to be forced to do all of this exercising - being forced to exercise makes it a lot less interesting. Do not take "This is for your own good" for an answer; if you do not want to do it, it is NOT for your good. (This, of course, would be a different story if you were actually fat.) ALSO tell her that exercising too much and not satiating your cravings is JUST AS UNHEALTHY AS BEING FAT IS. If you were to not eat healthful meals and not snack every now and then, no matter how healthy or unhealthy the food is, plus exercise so frequently, you would not be healthy.  Eating is good for you, even if the food isn't. Eating too little and eating too much is not healthy. Exercise is good for you. Not exercising enough and exercising too much is not good for you. If you talking to her doesn't help, try telling another adult how you feel, and maybe they can help get it through to her. Regardless of what happens, take care of yourself. Moderate how much you eat, but don't limit yourself to less than you feel you need. Exercise, but don't do something you don't want to; working out should be fun. Good luck with everything. I'm really sorry that she makes you feel so badly about this.
reply about 23 hours
jake495
jake495 posted in Family Issues:
Make sure she knows its your body not hers In a respectful way of course
reply about 24 hours
ThePaleWalker636
I'm perfectly happy with myself. I'm around 5'6" and somewhere between 140-150 pounds, and I don't feel fat. But my mom is constantly telling me that I am, or, at least, that I'm going to be. She forces me to go to exercise classes because I don't like many sports, tries making me go on diets, but I don't want to. She tells me that if I continue the way I am, having an extra cookie once in a while and only eating cereal for breakfast, that I'll end up fat, and she makes sure to emphasize how horrible that is for a person to live with. She rolls her eyes and sighs whenever she sees me getting a snack, and just in general makes me feel awful for eating the things I like and for relaxing. I've told her that I don't want to do these things and that she makes me feel bad when she says things like that, but she swears it's for my own good and that I should never want to be fat, that it ruins people's lives. How should I deal with this?
reply 1 day
drowning
drowning posted in Friends:
"NS12" wrote: I meet this guy at a festival and we have been talking for the whole week and my mum has noticed I keep texting someone and I know I need to tell her but I don t know how I am going to tell her, I doubt she ll get angry or anything but he lives about 4/5 hours away from me. I know I need to tell her as I don t like keeping secrets from her. I know this was a bit ago, but I truly hope that you were able to be open with your mother. If you feel as if they won't get mad at you, then chances are that your guardian will not. Honesty is the best policy, and if you feel guilt keeping a secret, then it is one you probably shouldn't be keeping.
reply 2 days
drowning
I agree with @rainbowpoptart. You really shouldn't worry about relationships that much given your age. I promise, they're better things to worry about than boys and more secure romances occur later on in life anyways. But, given the situation, you shouldn't worry about either. The boy is unfaithful and so is your friend. If your best friend really valued your friendship, she would not have put it in a position that could end it. Don't waste your time on those who will not put you first just as you do for them; better people will come into your life and they are the ones who you should really worry about.
reply 2 days