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Dear Dish-It, It Goes Against All My Beliefs


Dear Dish-It, is here to whisper "ttyl after I've thought about this some more".


Dear Dish-It,

I've been thinking about sex but it stands against everything I believe in, especially religion-wise. My boyfriend has been really stressing me about this - he says if I really love him I'll do it. But I have a bad feeling about it. Should I dump him and find someone who isn't so obsessed with sex, or should I just give him what he wants? I mean everyone's doing it, so why shouldn't I be one of them? But my faith towards God is telling me no. What should I do?
SCARED


Dear SCARED,

I can tell from your letter that you already know the answer to your question. But, you're trying to talk yourself into thinking it's okay to give into your BF's requests in order to hold onto him. Here's my advice: Don't. Any guy who uses the line, "You'd do it if you loved me" is not worth staying with. Your guy is manipulative and clearly has no respect for you or your beliefs. And no, everyone is NOT doing it. There are a ton of peeps out there who aren't having sex for various reasons - be it because of religious beliefs or something else, waiting is a smart move. Stick to your faith and kick this boy to the curb - he's only going to bring you down.


So, ya gotta burnin' question? Need some love directions? Thinkin' 'bout stuff like depression, sex,how ya feel 'bout YOURSELF (that's called "self-esteem"), boyfriends, girlfriends, losin' old friends, bullyin' or peer pressure, but too scared to ask the parents? Don't be scared to .


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Poll-4

Does Peer Pressure Influence You?

  • Yes, I'm totally influenced by what others tell me to do.
  • Not really - but sometimes I follow the crowd.
  • I used to be, but not anymore.
  • No way! I don't care what anyone else wants me to do.

Dear Dish-It In The Forums

PotterDrinksWater
While engagement isn't illegal for juveniles, marriage is as you can already tell. Judging by your feelings, I don't think the relationship will last long enough for him to be able to wait. I heard some courts will allow it, depending on location. Knowing whether her engagement is okay is a tricky thing. She seems pretty confident in the relationship. As for your own feelings, how well do you know him? Do you have any knowledge about him outside their love life? Do her parents know anything about him? If you don't now the answers, don't be afraid to ask them to her or her parents. I'm also a 16-year-old girl and I don't feel comfortable with it. Many young adults have a hard time understanding the transition from  teen to adult, but if he's put his problems on her, that's a bad sign. I don't think 5 months is long enough in my opinion and I think this could lead to making bad habits in a relationship. I appreciate that you're trying to help your friend be safe. Hopefully some of her closest people will help her with you. They don't necessarily have to steer her against him, but they should help guide her into deciding what's best ad how to carry on from that.
reply about 8 hours
CaptJolee
CaptJolee posted in Friends:
I don't even think that legal for a adult to marry a teen I think you should ask that part to make sure my theory is correct
reply about 11 hours
Boysrock50
Boysrock50 posted in Friends:
Do your parents know her parents? Maybe you could get your parents to speak to hers. Or if not, maybe tell her parents yourself that you're concerned. Try speaking to her and making sure she's 100% sure about what she's doing?
reply about 12 hours
KittyChes16
KittyChes16 posted in Friends:
So last year my friend got engaged at the age of sixteen to a guy of twenty-one and they only dated for 5 months at the time. I'm afraid she's making a mistake. They're still together, but her guy seems like he has a temper and might get abusive in the future.  What should I do? 
reply about 13 hours
DaEpicMuffin
DaEpicMuffin posted in Style:
50% Tomboy 20% Goth 30% Normal
reply about 22 hours