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Dear Dish-It, My Dad Hits Me


Dear Dish-It, is here to whisper "ttyl after I've thought about this some more".


Dear Dish-It,

Please help. I don't know what to do. Yesterday I asked if I could go bowling which is only a couple blocks away. The time was like at 9:30pm, so I called my dad and asked. He says no and I keep asking. When he comes home he tells all my friends to leave when they were supposed to be sleeping over. They leave and then he starts yelling at me saying why do I yell at him? I tell him I don't care what you tell me to do I'll do it anyways. He comes up to me and grabs me by my shirt which is pulling on my neck. My mom breaks it up. And then I go to sleep. I ask him, 'Dad, do you want me out of your life?' and he's like, 'I think so.' I was planning on calling abusive parenting or even the police, but I'm not sure what to do. This also has happened before. Ever since I was little he would always hit me and my sister. How do I make him stop or get rid of him and only him because my mom is good to me. My dad is the only problem. So please help me on what I should do to stop the hitting or to even get rid of him.
manarkthar


Dear manarkthar,

It sounds to me like you need to sit down with the 'rents for a talk. It's totally not cool of your dad to be hitting you, but it's also not cool to be disrespectful to your mom or dad. It's definitely your job to challenge your parents when they are being unfair, but telling them that you're going to do whatever you want, whenever you want isn't the way to gain their respect. If you're not comfortable talking to your dad about his temper, you should try talking to your mom by herself. Let her know how unhappy you are with your dad's actions and that way she might be able to smooth things out between you guys.


If you think you've attempted be a more respectful, and you've talked to your mom about how you feel, but still nothing's changed, you might want to talk to a school counselor or call the National Child Abuse Hotline at 1-800-4-A-CHILD. Remember though, reporting that your parent is abusive is a very serious accusation that is never taken lightly. The police might end up getting involved or child services may step in. It's important that you try to talk things out with your 'rents before taking the next step and getting the authorities involved. Of course, you are the only one who really knows how bad things are, so the ball is in your court. Hope this has helped - Good Luck!


So, ya gotta burnin' question? Need some love directions? Thinkin' 'bout stuff like depression, sex,how ya feel 'bout YOURSELF (that's called "self-esteem"), boyfriends, girlfriends, losin' old friends, bullyin' or peer pressure, but too scared to ask the parents? Don't be scared to .


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    Dear Dish-It In The Forums

    PerksBeingABookworm
    Dear Dish-It:  I recently became friends with an upperclassman guy, Tom*, from my high school. We started hanging out about a month or so ago. To be honest, I thought the relationship was platonic: we've never flirted although we've bantered, I don't use flirty emojis with him and although I spend a lot of time with him, he has always said how much I remind him of my brother (who is the same age as me), and he's never stolen glances at me or given me the impression that he was into me that way. I rationalized that he saw me as a little sister the same way as I viewed him as an older brother, since he constantly made references to my brother and never attempted to flirt nor gave off any of the typical visual signals of attraction. I also don't see myself as someone who'd be attractive or crush-worthy from the perspective of a high school junior, since I'm a freshman in high school and definitely not modelesque, and we pretty much stuck to group outings. So when he asked me out 2 weeks ago, needless to say it came as a surprise. We decided to remain friends, but I'm having trouble establishing boundaries, especially since my sister informed me that one of his friends told her that Tom "wasn't going to give up on me" and that Tom was going to adhere to the "Three Strikes Rule": apparently, he can wait and ask me out 2 more times before giving up on pursuing me.  Dish-It, how do I remain friends with this guy without this becoming awkward? What do I do? Just this past weekend he wanted to s**pe call me and kept s.n.a.p.ch*tting me. I literally feigned accidentally sleeping in yesterday to avoid meeting up with him (he invited my siblings and I to go play tennis at our high school), and I haven't talked to him since Saturday (we do track together so it was kind of unavoidable). I need space, and I want to remain friends, but he's really making me feel uncomfortable.  Thanks, -Perks. P.S.: This is the second junior who has asked me out this year (and the second guy I've rejected). Maybe I'm just really naive and oblivious, but I genuinely don't see myself as attractive to guys...how do I stop accidentally leading them on? Because I'm not trying to, really-I'm not flirty or anything. I have no idea why they like me, I don't think I'm being overly nice and I'm not answering texts right away or anything. This guy didn't get my phone information from me, he got it from another person on our coed sports team and he originally texted me 2 months ago to tell me that he was worried about my brother so I didn't think he was making a move on me. *Names have been changed for privacy reasons. (Also: the chat filter keeps unnecessarily censoring my writing).
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    drowning
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