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Sindy's Blog - August 14, 2003

August 14, 2003

I don't even know where to begin. I don't think I've ever felt this bad before in my life. How do I even begin explaining what I am going through? I just had this amazing vacation with my fam and my best friend, was feeling on top of the world and then this happens! OMG!

We didn't get home until late last night but I thought, I haven't seen Dylan in weeks, and I'm sure he'll still be awake so I'll just drop by his place for a quick hello. His parents aren't as freaky about late night visitors as my 'rents are, anyway. So, I head on over, knock on the door and do you know who answers? Sara.

Now, for the record, Sara showed up at our school last semester, all alone with no friends, and I hang out with her. I introduce her to everyone - and it seems like we've become really good friends. Well, now apparently Dylan and Sara are more the good friends. Dylan was feeling lonely while I was gone so he started hangin' with Sara a lot and things "just happened".

Dylan explains this to me in the first five seconds that I'm standing there. I couldn't take bein' near either of them so I did what any normal girl would have done. I started to cry and I ran home. Yeah, I'm really proud of myself. I can't believe I started to cry. What a huge loser I am.

I still don't really know why I am so upset. It's not like we were some long-term, exclusive couple or anything - but I did think we had something. I certainly didn't think I had to worry about him finding someone new in a matter of weeks, especially not one of my friends! What was he thinking? What was I ever thinking by liking him?

I'm going to dig into a big tub of ice cream now and listen to some soulful tunes. I'm not even a fan of the ballads, but it seems like it's time for some good wallowing music. And I'm definitely in the mood for wallowing.

Peace Out,

Sindy

Related Stories:

  • Sindy's Blog - August 7, 2003
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    "SatanslilDemon" wrote: Ok so I have a dilemma. I really, and I mean really like this guy. He's considerate of my mental wellbeing and health, plus he's really funny and sweet. He's respectful, loyal, and his hugs are the best ever(he's like a foot and 4 inches taller than me). the dilemma is, he'stwentyandI'mfifteenturningsixteensoon.... I'm not gonna even ask about dating him until i'm sixteen but I've called him in total anxiety attack crying my eyes out and he calmed me down and made me laugh, and I invited him to come see a choir performance so he spent the day with me... My mom ships us... but I'm a little worried because of the age difference  and experience difference and just, I don't want to miss the chance of being with him because of it. ​  any advice??? It's really nice that your mother supports it, that always helps!! I'm glad that your family enjoys his company as well. Being 16 while he's 20 is alright. It's a slight odd age gap. But, I think as long as you both are ready, it's alright. Make sure you're mature and safe with your choices though. Personally, I think you should wait until you're closer to at least, 17. But, as long as you two are smart about what you're doing, it should be alright when it come around to it.
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    "Shygirl15" wrote:I really like this boy in my second period class but i dont know how to tell him because he knows that im transgender do whatever makes you feel comfortable or just wing it and tell him and if he tells you something because you're trans forget about him! He doesn't deserve you. But it's totally okay if you want to play it safe and not go up to him. You do you. :3 
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    fitta
    "SatanslilDemon" wrote: Ok so I have a dilemma. I really, and I mean really like this guy. He's considerate of my mental wellbeing and health, plus he's really funny and sweet. He's respectful, loyal, and his hugs are the best ever(he's like a foot and 4 inches taller than me). the dilemma is, he'stwentyandI'mfifteenturningsixteensoon.... I'm not gonna even ask about dating him until i'm sixteen but I've called him in total anxiety attack crying my eyes out and he calmed me down and made me laugh, and I invited him to come see a choir performance so he spent the day with me... My mom ships us... but I'm a little worried because of the age difference  and experience difference and just, I don't want to miss the chance of being with him because of it. ​  any advice??? i suggest you wait i mean you are going to be 16 that's way too young to be dating someone who is 4/5 years older than you,no? You can still talk to him when it comes to your anxiety attacks and all of that because I have those too every night so I know how it feels, but maybe you should wait. But at the end of the day it's your decision I'm just here to give advice 
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    SatanslilDemon
    Ok so I have a dilemma. I really, and I mean really like this guy. He's considerate of my mental wellbeing and health, plus he's really funny and sweet. He's respectful, loyal, and his hugs are the best ever(he's like a foot and 4 inches taller than me). the dilemma is, he'stwentyandI'mfifteenturningsixteensoon.... I'm not gonna even ask about dating him until i'm sixteen but I've called him in total anxiety attack crying my eyes out and he calmed me down and made me laugh, and I invited him to come see a choir performance so he spent the day with me... My mom ships us... but I'm a little worried because of the age difference  and experience difference and just, I don't want to miss the chance of being with him because of it. ​  any advice???
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    SmartSunnyShadow
    I feel like that too. My best friend will always hang out with her 'new friends' that I have a really bad opinion about. My friend will treat me rudely all the time and sometimes make fun of me with her friends. But, when I needed her the most in my life, she was there for me, and I told her how I felt. She says that she just wants to hang out with more people and apologized, people can be a little teasy at times.  Also, after seeing each other for a long time, people make new friends and start hanging out with them more, it doesn't mean that she doesn't like you.  This may be different for you, but just tell her about it, she will have to know you feelings at one point.  Hope I helped you. 
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