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Dear Dish-It, I'm in Love With My Best Friend

Advice for teens about love, dating, relationships, best friends and other teen issues.
Advice For Teens About Love

Dear Dish-It, is here to whisper "ttyl after I've thought about this some more".


Dear Dish-It,

There is this guy and he has a girlfriend. He is like totally my best friend and I am starting to have feelings for him. He flirts with me and he defends me but then he talks about his girlfriend a lot. I want to ask him out but I don't want him to say no. I don't want to break up him and his girlfriend and I don't want to break up our friendship. Some people say, "Well, he's not worth it." But deep inside I love him so much! And his girlfriend now is a jerk. I just don't want him to get hurt by her. I guess I'm jealous of her but I have a major crush on him! Please help!
KATLYN


Dear KATLYN,

I still haven't figured out why so many girls fall in love with boys who are already taken. They must know they are setting themselves up for heartbreak but they keep on fooling themselves that they are the best match for the boy they are crushin' on. You need to put yourself in this other girl's shoes. How would you like it if your BF's best friend kept trying to put the moves on your guy? You may have a major crush on him but that doesn't give you the right to mess around with their happiness. Even if you don't like this girl, that's not the point. It sounds like your best friend really cares about her and as a good friend you should be supportive of that - instead of trying to break them up. If you and your best bud are meant to be, it'll happen. But for now, keep your feelings to yourself and stop trying to make other people's lives miserable to make yourself happy.


So, ya gotta burnin' question? Need some love directions? Thinkin' 'bout stuff like depression, sex,how ya feel 'bout YOURSELF (that's called "self-esteem"), boyfriends, girlfriends, losin' old friends, bullyin' or peer pressure, but too scared to ask the parents? Don't be scared to .


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    Comments

    Holley12

    Holley12 wrote:

    Um, I would ask him if he ever breaks up with his girlfriend. This happened to me over ...
    commented: Wed Nov 23, 2011

    babysis

    babysis wrote:

    yooo yalllll .... wachin a moviii , ..................
    commented: Sun Nov 20, 2011

    Vampire Girl54123
    Really?
    commented: Sun Nov 20, 2011

    there are 34 more comments

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    Dear Dish-It in the forums

    Boysrock50
    Boysrock50 posted in Friends:
    The perfect friend would always be there to support you when you have a problem, and will offer to help. The perfect friend is someone who guides you to doing the right things, not the wrong things. They would make the effort to talk to you, not wait for you to contact them first all the time, as friendship should be a 50-50 relationship. They would stay your friend for years, not leave you as soon as they find someone 'cooler'. They won't act different around others to impress them and leave you. They would listen to you just as much as they tell you things. They would turn to you as their first choice, not their reserve choice. But most importantly, the perfect friend would be someone who always makes you happy to be with.
    reply about 1 hour
    brunostar
    brunostar posted in Friends:
    You want someone who cares, understands and will be there for you, and not just when you're down. You want someone who makes you smile and laugh at 3 am and you have to try not to giggle in class because of something that happened a weeks ago. Everyone fights, but you don't want someone who you constantly fight with and who makes you feel down or drops your self-esteem. If someone bothers you to do bad stuff, walk the other direction and don't take in the negative force. I'm the type of person that takes people in for who they are, I care and listen and try my best to make them laugh and be happy. I have gotten mixed with bad friends as in talking me into negative things, constantly making me feel down, ditching for other people, insulting other friends. I need to change how I act, I seem to annoy and bother people a lot. And possibly I care too much, I also at times understand too little. I get attached to easily and hurt easily. I don't know what else you asked so imma end this now xD
    reply about 1 hour
    MissD
    MissD posted in Friends:
    Describe the perfect friend in your opinion.  In what ways are you a good friend? What do you need to do to become a better friend?  What do you think? 
    reply about 2 hours
    MissD
    MissD posted in Friends:
    Honestly? They aren't safe for you. Depression is difficult to overcome. Especially when people are negative about it around you. If they refuse to believe you, then there is no point trying to be friends with them again. Some people just don't accept mental problems or swear that they are being faked. I never quite understood why people don't acknowledge it, but whatever. Moving on from that, you should find friends that you don't need to pretend around - depression isn't too uncommon. Look and listen. You'll find the right people - they just proved that they weren't it. No one can go back and make a brand-new start, but anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending!  I really like the post above me, Huntress that was really good advice. I have a theory, there are two kinds of people in the world, Vampires and Sunshine. The vampires, take from us: they suck our self esteem, positive thoughts, smiles, energy.. YUCK. Sunshine on the other hand, gives and gives. You feel warmer just being around sunshine people, they lift you up, remind you about your good qualities, cheer for you and help you be your best most true self.  Here is the other thing about Vampires and Sunshine - Vampires tend to run in packs, they draw their power from taking other peoples away - and IMO they are insatiable. Sunshine people are awesome, even if you only have one in your life - it's enough.  I hope you will look around and see if you can spot the difference, I'd love to know if you have at least one Sunshine person in your life - let go of those horrible vampires, in the end you will feel much better for having made that empowered decision!!  Good Luck! 
    reply about 2 hours
    Huntress
    Huntress posted in Friends:
    Honestly? They aren't safe for you. Depression is difficult to overcome. Especially when people are negative about it around you. If they refuse to believe you, then there is no point trying to be friends with them again. Some people just don't accept mental problems or swear that they are being faked. I never quite understood why people don't acknowledge it, but whatever. Moving on from that, you should find friends that you don't need to pretend around - depression isn't too uncommon. Look and listen. You'll find the right people - they just proved that they weren't it.
    reply about 2 hours

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