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Dear Dish-It, My Mom and I Fight a Lot

Dear Dish-It, is here to whisper "ttyl after I've thought about this some more".

Dear Dish-It,

Me and my mom don't have such a great relationship. We fight a lot and it always seems to be my fault. It is like she never does anything wrong, but I know that she does... and that really frustrates me cuz I don't always do everything that makes us fight all the time. And then my dad is remarried and me and my stepmom don't get along that well either because she thinks I am jealous of her and my dad because she gets all of the attention and I don't get any. So the best thing I have mother-wise is my best friend and she knows exactly what I am going through... but I wanna be able to have a real mom. Please tell me what to do.
iluvkylied

Dear iluvkylied,

Everyone needs a loving and supportive mom to talk to, give us advice and help us solve our problems, so I'm sorry to hear that things aren't going well at home. I'm glad to know that you have such an awesome best friend though!

Your mom could be having a tough time dealing with all the changes - the divorce, your dad's new marriage, his new wife - and is taking her frustration out on you. I know it's not fair, but we all tend to take things out on the people who are closest to us. I think your mom needs a little time to adjust to everything, so just be patient with her, even when she's blaming you for something that's totally not your fault. One way to help her deal is by giving her space, but letting her know you're around if she wants to talk. You could also help her get her mind off the sad stuff by doing something fun together, like going shopping, watching movies or pigging out on cookies and ice cream.

You should also sit down with your mom and dad and have a heart-to-heart. It's best to talk to them when everyone's chill, not during the middle of a heated argument. Be open and honest when you let 'em know how upset you are about the frequent arguments with your mom and the lack of attention from your dad. Hopefully once they see how upset and frustrated you are, they'll see the error of their ways (yes, parents make mistakes too!), be more understanding of you and work out a compromise. I hope this helps, iluvkylied - good luck!

So, ya gotta burnin' question? Need some love directions? Thinkin' 'bout stuff like depression, sex,how ya feel 'bout YOURSELF (that's called "self-esteem"), boyfriends, girlfriends, losin' old friends, bullyin' or peer pressure, but too scared to ask the parents? Don't be scared to here. But 'member, if ya hang out in Chat with other Kidzworld members who know ya by your 'username', ya might wanna use a secret nickname when ya write in. That way no one'll ever know it's you. And, just in case ya don't know, Dish-It gets a lotta letters everyday, and she can't answer 'em all. So keep checkin' the column cuz she's prob'ly answerin' somethin' very similar to your question while you're out doin' somethin' else. K? And Thanks! Ya keep her outta trouble. Oh! And if ya've got words of wisdom you wanna share, We'll dish 'em up, too.

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Have Your Parents Ever Remarried?

  • Yeah, my parents have already remarried.
  • No, but they're divorced and seeing other people.
  • My parents are still married to each other.
  • No, but my parents are separated.

Dear Dish-It In The Forums

drowning
"SatanslilDemon" wrote: Ok so I have a dilemma. I really, and I mean really like this guy. He's considerate of my mental wellbeing and health, plus he's really funny and sweet. He's respectful, loyal, and his hugs are the best ever(he's like a foot and 4 inches taller than me). the dilemma is, he'stwentyandI'mfifteenturningsixteensoon.... I'm not gonna even ask about dating him until i'm sixteen but I've called him in total anxiety attack crying my eyes out and he calmed me down and made me laugh, and I invited him to come see a choir performance so he spent the day with me... My mom ships us... but I'm a little worried because of the age difference  and experience difference and just, I don't want to miss the chance of being with him because of it. ​  any advice??? It's really nice that your mother supports it, that always helps!! I'm glad that your family enjoys his company as well. Being 16 while he's 20 is alright. It's a slight odd age gap. But, I think as long as you both are ready, it's alright. Make sure you're mature and safe with your choices though. Personally, I think you should wait until you're closer to at least, 17. But, as long as you two are smart about what you're doing, it should be alright when it come around to it.
reply 2 days
fitta
"Shygirl15" wrote:I really like this boy in my second period class but i dont know how to tell him because he knows that im transgender do whatever makes you feel comfortable or just wing it and tell him and if he tells you something because you're trans forget about him! He doesn't deserve you. But it's totally okay if you want to play it safe and not go up to him. You do you. :3 
reply 2 days
fitta
"SatanslilDemon" wrote: Ok so I have a dilemma. I really, and I mean really like this guy. He's considerate of my mental wellbeing and health, plus he's really funny and sweet. He's respectful, loyal, and his hugs are the best ever(he's like a foot and 4 inches taller than me). the dilemma is, he'stwentyandI'mfifteenturningsixteensoon.... I'm not gonna even ask about dating him until i'm sixteen but I've called him in total anxiety attack crying my eyes out and he calmed me down and made me laugh, and I invited him to come see a choir performance so he spent the day with me... My mom ships us... but I'm a little worried because of the age difference  and experience difference and just, I don't want to miss the chance of being with him because of it. ​  any advice??? i suggest you wait i mean you are going to be 16 that's way too young to be dating someone who is 4/5 years older than you,no? You can still talk to him when it comes to your anxiety attacks and all of that because I have those too every night so I know how it feels, but maybe you should wait. But at the end of the day it's your decision I'm just here to give advice 
reply 2 days
SatanslilDemon
Ok so I have a dilemma. I really, and I mean really like this guy. He's considerate of my mental wellbeing and health, plus he's really funny and sweet. He's respectful, loyal, and his hugs are the best ever(he's like a foot and 4 inches taller than me). the dilemma is, he'stwentyandI'mfifteenturningsixteensoon.... I'm not gonna even ask about dating him until i'm sixteen but I've called him in total anxiety attack crying my eyes out and he calmed me down and made me laugh, and I invited him to come see a choir performance so he spent the day with me... My mom ships us... but I'm a little worried because of the age difference  and experience difference and just, I don't want to miss the chance of being with him because of it. ​  any advice???
reply 2 days
SmartSunnyShadow
I feel like that too. My best friend will always hang out with her 'new friends' that I have a really bad opinion about. My friend will treat me rudely all the time and sometimes make fun of me with her friends. But, when I needed her the most in my life, she was there for me, and I told her how I felt. She says that she just wants to hang out with more people and apologized, people can be a little teasy at times.  Also, after seeing each other for a long time, people make new friends and start hanging out with them more, it doesn't mean that she doesn't like you.  This may be different for you, but just tell her about it, she will have to know you feelings at one point.  Hope I helped you. 
reply 3 days