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Dear Dish-It, My Mom and I Fight a Lot

Dish-It serves up advice about family problems.
Advice About Families

Dear Dish-It, is here to whisper "ttyl after I've thought about this some more".

Dear Dish-It,

Me and my mom don't have such a great relationship. We fight a lot and it always seems to be my fault. It is like she never does anything wrong, but I know that she does... and that really frustrates me cuz I don't always do everything that makes us fight all the time. And then my dad is remarried and me and my stepmom don't get along that well either because she thinks I am jealous of her and my dad because she gets all of the attention and I don't get any. So the best thing I have mother-wise is my best friend and she knows exactly what I am going through... but I wanna be able to have a real mom. Please tell me what to do.
iluvkylied

Dear iluvkylied,

Everyone needs a loving and supportive mom to talk to, give us advice and help us solve our problems, so I'm sorry to hear that things aren't going well at home. I'm glad to know that you have such an awesome best friend though!

Your mom could be having a tough time dealing with all the changes - the divorce, your dad's new marriage, his new wife - and is taking her frustration out on you. I know it's not fair, but we all tend to take things out on the people who are closest to us. I think your mom needs a little time to adjust to everything, so just be patient with her, even when she's blaming you for something that's totally not your fault. One way to help her deal is by giving her space, but letting her know you're around if she wants to talk. You could also help her get her mind off the sad stuff by doing something fun together, like going shopping, watching movies or pigging out on cookies and ice cream.

You should also sit down with your mom and dad and have a heart-to-heart. It's best to talk to them when everyone's chill, not during the middle of a heated argument. Be open and honest when you let 'em know how upset you are about the frequent arguments with your mom and the lack of attention from your dad. Hopefully once they see how upset and frustrated you are, they'll see the error of their ways (yes, parents make mistakes too!), be more understanding of you and work out a compromise. I hope this helps, iluvkylied - good luck!

So, ya gotta burnin' question? Need some love directions? Thinkin' 'bout stuff like depression, sex,how ya feel 'bout YOURSELF (that's called "self-esteem"), boyfriends, girlfriends, losin' old friends, bullyin' or peer pressure, but too scared to ask the parents? Don't be scared to here. But 'member, if ya hang out in Chat with other Kidzworld members who know ya by your 'username', ya might wanna use a secret nickname when ya write in. That way no one'll ever know it's you. And, just in case ya don't know, Dish-It gets a lotta letters everyday, and she can't answer 'em all. So keep checkin' the column cuz she's prob'ly answerin' somethin' very similar to your question while you're out doin' somethin' else. K? And Thanks! Ya keep her outta trouble. Oh! And if ya've got words of wisdom you wanna share, We'll dish 'em up, too.

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Comments

kelsey35

kelsey35 wrote:

im just like my mom so yea there are conflicts some times
commented: Mon Apr 21, 2014

sweetiepie15

sweetiepie15 wrote:

me and my mom fight all the time
commented: Mon Apr 21, 2014

Halley111

Halley111 wrote:

Meow girl I believe her you don't know what other people have going on in there life
commented: Fri Dec 06, 2013

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Dear Dish-It in the forums

jordand08
jordand08 posted in Friends:
"Bwubbles" wrote:My best friend will NOT stop self harming. She's told about 2 other of our close friends and we all tried to work together to make her stop. She'd just lost her favorite cousin, that's when it all started. We tried to tell her that there's better things to do but she just will NOT stop! I've already told her mom, and there's still no stopping her! I'm just really worried for her and I don't know what else to do!  =( =( Tell you're guidance consular at school. That should help. 
reply about 5 hours
Bwubbles
Bwubbles posted in Friends:
I hang out with a bunch of different groups of people.. All of which have drama. And it is NOT fun. They all expect me to choose a side and start making me feel bad so that I would HAVE to pick them. It really doesn't make me feel so good, I don't know what to do. :/
reply about 5 hours
Bwubbles
Bwubbles posted in Friends:
My best friend will NOT stop self harming. She's told about 2 other of our close friends and we all tried to work together to make her stop. She'd just lost her favorite cousin, that's when it all started. We tried to tell her that there's better things to do but she just will NOT stop! I've already told her mom, and there's still no stopping her! I'm just really worried for her and I don't know what else to do!  =( =(
reply about 5 hours
BookwormKat
BookwormKat posted in Friends:
My bestie Lydia's mom, had her when she was 12. Lydia's mom is like the best mom out there. True, Lydia has a hard time not having a dad and having to be real responsible. But Rosalyn is an awesome mom. Don't be so judgy people.
reply about 8 hours
Kirsteeeeen
Kirsteeeeen posted in Friends:
You should go over to her house and ask. Just talk to her. Communication is key.
reply about 13 hours

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