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Dear Dish-It, My Mom and I Fight a Lot

Dear Dish-It, is here to whisper "ttyl after I've thought about this some more".

Dear Dish-It,

Me and my mom don't have such a great relationship. We fight a lot and it always seems to be my fault. It is like she never does anything wrong, but I know that she does... and that really frustrates me cuz I don't always do everything that makes us fight all the time. And then my dad is remarried and me and my stepmom don't get along that well either because she thinks I am jealous of her and my dad because she gets all of the attention and I don't get any. So the best thing I have mother-wise is my best friend and she knows exactly what I am going through... but I wanna be able to have a real mom. Please tell me what to do.
iluvkylied

Dear iluvkylied,

Everyone needs a loving and supportive mom to talk to, give us advice and help us solve our problems, so I'm sorry to hear that things aren't going well at home. I'm glad to know that you have such an awesome best friend though!

Your mom could be having a tough time dealing with all the changes - the divorce, your dad's new marriage, his new wife - and is taking her frustration out on you. I know it's not fair, but we all tend to take things out on the people who are closest to us. I think your mom needs a little time to adjust to everything, so just be patient with her, even when she's blaming you for something that's totally not your fault. One way to help her deal is by giving her space, but letting her know you're around if she wants to talk. You could also help her get her mind off the sad stuff by doing something fun together, like going shopping, watching movies or pigging out on cookies and ice cream.

You should also sit down with your mom and dad and have a heart-to-heart. It's best to talk to them when everyone's chill, not during the middle of a heated argument. Be open and honest when you let 'em know how upset you are about the frequent arguments with your mom and the lack of attention from your dad. Hopefully once they see how upset and frustrated you are, they'll see the error of their ways (yes, parents make mistakes too!), be more understanding of you and work out a compromise. I hope this helps, iluvkylied - good luck!

So, ya gotta burnin' question? Need some love directions? Thinkin' 'bout stuff like depression, sex,how ya feel 'bout YOURSELF (that's called "self-esteem"), boyfriends, girlfriends, losin' old friends, bullyin' or peer pressure, but too scared to ask the parents? Don't be scared to here. But 'member, if ya hang out in Chat with other Kidzworld members who know ya by your 'username', ya might wanna use a secret nickname when ya write in. That way no one'll ever know it's you. And, just in case ya don't know, Dish-It gets a lotta letters everyday, and she can't answer 'em all. So keep checkin' the column cuz she's prob'ly answerin' somethin' very similar to your question while you're out doin' somethin' else. K? And Thanks! Ya keep her outta trouble. Oh! And if ya've got words of wisdom you wanna share, We'll dish 'em up, too.

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Kirsti posted in Family Issues:
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To be honest, this is probably just something you have to bear. I know that sometimes relatives can be irritating, but they only visit often because they care about you and want to see you (: Unless there is a real reason you don't want them to visit - for example, if they are unkind to you - then you should just endure it.  Or you could mention it to your parents and see if they can sort it out? This is something lots of kids have to deal with, me included, and it's just part of life! You are lucky to have grandparents who care about you so much c:
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